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Women- How to feel better about yourself

Updated on September 25, 2011

The American Women

Most women depend on a man's view of herself. Will this catch his attention? Would my friend think this is cute? Am I trying too hard? The truth is, you are trying too hard. Why does it matter what they think? Will they be the one wearing the otfit? Will he actually be the one? The chances consist of two words, probably not. Even if you do get married, it is a 50/50 chance the marriage will end in divorce.

Because of these harsh facts, it is time some women in America accepted the reality of female empowerment. I am not taking about becoming a feminist. Most of them fight for equal rights until around the ages of 40-50 until they just wish a man would buy them dinner. No, I have a different goal in mind.

The Power of Being a Woman

As a child, I hated being a female. As Freud would say "she had penis envy". He does not mean that I desired the genitals of a male for this is false. The phrase means that I desired the power men had over women. They earned more, were the head of the house, make the big decisions, were the most respected, etc. And yet, what does a woman do? Like in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, "the woman stays at home, cooks for the family, and makes babies".

In my teens, I became even more frustrated. I hated the thought of menstral cycles and began to hate God for making me a female. Not knowing what to do with myself, I hid in my room for years. I still had a life. I was constantly traveling and sticking my nose into books trying to make sense of life. On a trip to France, I realized what to do with myself.

The women in France do not care what other people think about them. They let their power shine from their feminity. Women can birth children, they are the future of our race. A woman knows the people around her typically better than a man. We can do quite a few things men cannot and were created as such. If we do not accept what we were created as, we will remain lost, unknown as to who we are. It is important that we gather ourselves together and have a good identity of us as a person.

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

The only person you need to impress is yourself. If you are dressing for a man to marry, then stop doing so. A man should focus on a woman for who she is. However, he will not know who you are if you are dressing to impress someone other than yourself. By dressing to impress yourself, you are dressing to your personality and enjoyment. He will see a woman who loves herself instead of a woman who cannot handle herself.

Appearance of Adoration

When looking your best there are a few points to have in check such as nails, hair, and shoes. Some women believe they cannot change their appearance as much as they would like to match their personality.

Nails- Always try to have your nails done. A manicure and a peticure can go a long way. Every intelligent male desires a female who has her life and body together. By having nice nails is a sign that you know what you are doing and have yourself put together. Also the style of your nails give a look at your personality and character. Everything about them speaks out; the color, the style, and creativity.

Hair- There is as much to do with hair as there is with nails. You choose the cut. Do you like short hair? This is normally the sign of a busy person who enjoys their life and time. Do you have long hair? The long hair look normally means they are more traditional or used to everything long term, including relationships. The color is also important. Will you go natural or color your hair? Because I enjoy change, my hair is constantly colored every other month. From blonde to brown, I enjoy switching life up every once in a while. Also my hair is long as I enjoy long term relationships and planning.

Shoes- Shoes can sparkle, shine, add color to a plain outfit, or spice up what is already a busy canvas. When you shop for shoes, the goal is to find shoes you adore that can fit you. Do not worry if they will match your clothes. The chance is that you have some clothes to match already. If you have a black dress or outfit, any color will match to make it you.

Clothes Anyone?

Clothes can be confusing since there are so many of them. They are everywhere, at the movies, in magazines, on the television, even at church, anywhere you look. But what do you buy that matches you? Do not waste your money on any piece of clothing you think you will wear. Buy what you adore and love. If you see a top and love the lace, color and cut; then purchase it. If you find a pair of pants that are cheap and you have five other pairs of pants, do not purchase them just because of the price. This hurts your self-esteem every time you wear those pants or see them in your home.

You do not need a hundred or even fifty pieces of clothing. If you can look great and adore yourself in three pairs of pants, two pairs of shorts, and six shirts and them be the only pieces of clothing you own, they are worth it. Quality is better than quantity.

Bra's and Panties

Believe it or not, your under-clothes matter more than you think. Ask yourself a couple of questions. Do your panties match your bra's? Do they fit perfectly? Were they a set? Do you even wear them together? Wearing matching underwear adds to your self-esteem. You have the power of the panties with you. Though no males might see them, you know that they are there.

There are a few more questions that matter when it comes to under-clothes. Do they make you feel sexy or do you just think they are sexy? When you put on your lingerie, you should feel sexy almost instantly. You have a gorgeous body and should feel comfortable in everything you wear. Love yourself for who you are, not what you think you are.


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    • kittyjj profile image

      Ann Leung 6 years ago from San Jose, California

      I definitely agreed with you that "by dressing better, you also feel better about yourself." It's not necessary to put on all fancy stuff. I like the beauty of simplicity. Great hub! Voted up! :)

    • lburmaster profile image

      Leah Lenau 6 years ago from Houston, TX

      I think you are commenting on the wrong hub. However, Freud has many issues. Personally I prefer Yung. Though why would anyone want to know which one is more noticable to a child?

    • ptosis profile image

      ptosis 6 years ago from Arizona

      Freud has been debunked and dismissed on most of his theories. - What is more likely to be noticed as a young child? A mother's unbound bosems during a hug - or a little pouch in a man's pants?

      _For b4 & after photo retouching examples check this out:

      Proof Of Unrealistic Beauty Goals, A Study By Dartmouth College

    • lburmaster profile image

      Leah Lenau 6 years ago from Houston, TX

      By dressing better, you also feel better about yourself. These are advice tips for those who suffer from depression or self-esteem issues. If you are perfectly happy just the way you are, then you do not need these tips. And I'm glad that you are independent enough to have a strong self-esteem without help!

    • Ania L profile image

      Ania L 6 years ago from United Kingdom

      So is it the look only that matters? Still dress to impress...but yourself?

      Well you are probably right, people make decisions based on first impression so once they have seen you for a second, they believe they know your heart.

      Well... we cannot change the world I guess, so I'd rather be myself and do what I want instead of doing my nails, hair, shopping for clothes, etc. There are so many more interesting things to do although I know most women would disagree :)

    • Lord De Cross profile image

      Joseph De Cross 6 years ago

      wow..on the border of mature pics? nice hub..specially for us guys.Voted up!