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About Cancer And Cataracts

Updated on February 8, 2016

A Chinese lady goes to see a Chinese optometrist. He examines her and says;

“You have catalack.”

She thinks a while and answers;

“No Lincoln Continental”

At the start of the second week of December I went to Pretoria. As we were going along the N1 I noticed a black dot dancing on the windscreen, I closed my right eye. In the shock of seeing everything in total blur out of my left eye, I thought of the above story and surmised I probably had a Cadillac in my left eye. The black dot ? They call it an “O Ring”.

When I was diagnosed with bladder cancer, in August 2015, I was to a degree prepared for it, so I wasn’t shocked or scared, I had researched, read up possible causes for my symptoms up to the point I could ask the doctors questions laced with pragmatic dry humor. When I asked of the chances the cancer would breach the lining and go to my lungs, the doctor said not for a long time, if ever. My answer was:

“As long as you can keep me alive to cover the exclusions in my funeral cover which is six months. I can live with that.”

Only when faced with the possibility of a dreaded disease did I decide to take out a funeral policy. Why I don’t know. The only two certainties is death and taxes, the fact of the matter is, you are going to die, I am going to die we are all going to die, just not today. With the cost of funerals, funeral cover makes sense. If you aren’t covered think about it and choose wisely reading the exclusions.

I had two procedures and was awake during both of them; bad move on their part had them answering a lot of questions, and laughing. The second time the anesthetist hands was shaking so much he was having a problem getting the needle into my spine. I put my hand up he stopped. I said

“Hey Doc just chill everything’s cool, well actually bleeding freezing after the local you painted, it’s cool so chill.”

With that they all laughed, I think it was the first time they heard a patient telling a doctor to relax in the vernacular of the younger generation. I didn’t even feel the needle going in after that.

When I went for my checkup I asked the doctor for a referral to the eye clinic just across the passage. The Sister was apologetic to the fact the first available date was 18th July.

I told her;

“Everything happens to the good, for those who love The Lord.”

To be honest I think I said it more for my benefit than hers.

On the train back home, to Berlin, No No not that Berlin, the Berlin in the Eastern Cape South Africa, about an hours ride, I reflected on a story of Mpemba It is about a young school boy in Tanzania asking why hot water freezes quicker than cold water. Everybody tells him it is impossible. One day a physics professor from America visits the school, Mpemba asks him, the professor tells him he doesn’t think it is possible but will look into it. The professor gets someone else to do the tests. A week later the professor phones and asks for the results. He gets told there is something wrong the hot water is freezing quicker than the cold water they will carry on till they get the right answer. The professor told them they had the right answer.

I thought of how often I keep looking for answer to prayer, not realizing if I stopped to think the prayer was already answered, it is up to me to accept the answer and give thanks. I also need to prepare my mind for the answer, just as I need to prepare the soil before planting seeds.

Over the next few months I will be going frequently to the hospital in East London, I enjoy the morning train trip, leaving at 4:30 in the morning. Being the only white person on board, it was with some reservation I boarded the first time only to find as other commuters boarded, they would go and greet other passengers with a firm hand shake, and it wouldn’t be long before they started singing, followed by a prayer then a fervent sermon. Then just before getting to one of the main stops, an enthusiastic prayer to end the service.


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