We all know the serenity prayer asking for the serenity to accept the things you can't change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference. We can read volumes as to how to have the courage to change the things we can, but little on how to accept things you can't change. What do YOU say to yourself, what do YOU do, to accept the things you can't change? I'm specifically looking for NON-RELIGIOUS responses to this question - NOT understanding that God has a plan, NOT prayer, etc., etc. - just everyday cognitive strategies.
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Sherry, thanks. But HOW? I think we do something in our heads to cope. Religious people seem to feel "It's God's will." "There's a reason for everything." "I'll turn this into good." (Opps, just think I found an answer in the latter sentence.)
Thinking about the lesson to be learned - great! I went to a site on finding your purpose and they had a great exercise that people might like - http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/01/how-to-di...
What's odd is that once we go to the opposite extreme like saying it was all my fault even though it was not in the least, the resistence is gone. The energy of the hurt is taken away when we do that. It's a bit of a slippery slope psychologically
Thanks TNT. The focus on the things you can change seems great. It's all a matter of focus.
Thanks residentstone! I just told my adult daughter yesterday to embrace a situation. Of course, I can't do it well! I have a hard time accepting that I'm "divorced." I can type it, but not say it. I can only say "my husband left when I was 42."
Its not easy, but there comes a point, at least for me, when sh*t was so bad, it was either learn to accept it, or off yourself. And after you get to that point a few times in life, almost everything else is easy. These days I'm like teflon:0)
Residentstone, I love your humor! Exactly right "It's either learn to accept it, or off yourself and I don't like the latter option. . Here's to teflon toughness!
That takes a lot of mental strength! I think I've been in a country blues song cycle all my life :) Just asking questions on hubpages does help. You realize like Louisa Mae Alcott says, "Life breaks everyone and many are strong in the broken places.