Billie Kelpin profile image 92

What are NON-Religious strategies for coping with "the things you can't change"?


We all know the serenity prayer asking for the serenity to accept the things you can't change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference. We can read volumes as to how to have the courage to change the things we can, but little on how to accept things you can't change. What do YOU say to yourself, what do YOU do, to accept the things you can't change? I'm specifically looking for NON-RELIGIOUS responses to this question - NOT understanding that God has a plan, NOT prayer, etc., etc. - just everyday cognitive strategies.

 

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Sherry Hewins profile image95

Sherry Hewins says

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4 years ago
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    Billie Kelpin 4 years ago

    Sherry, thanks. But HOW? I think we do something in our heads to cope. Religious people seem to feel "It's God's will." "There's a reason for everything." "I'll turn this into good." (Opps, just think I found an answer in the latter sentence.)

Faceless39 profile image91

Faceless39 says

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4 years ago
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Rod Martin Jr (lone77star) says

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4 years ago
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    Billie Kelpin 4 years ago

    What's odd is that once we go to the opposite extreme like saying it was all my fault even though it was not in the least, the resistence is gone. The energy of the hurt is taken away when we do that. It's a bit of a slippery slope psychologically

TNT Husky profile image75

Devlin Kendall (TNT Husky) says

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4 years ago
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    Billie Kelpin 4 years ago

    Thanks TNT. The focus on the things you can change seems great. It's all a matter of focus.

residentstone profile image61

Resident (residentstone) says

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4 years ago
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    Billie Kelpin 4 years ago

    Thanks residentstone! I just told my adult daughter yesterday to embrace a situation. Of course, I can't do it well! I have a hard time accepting that I'm "divorced." I can type it, but not say it. I can only say "my husband left when I was 42."


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joyce31202 profile image78

joyce31202 says

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4 years ago
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    Billie Kelpin 4 years ago

    That takes a lot of mental strength! I think I've been in a country blues song cycle all my life :) Just asking questions on hubpages does help. You realize like Louisa Mae Alcott says, "Life breaks everyone and many are strong in the broken places.