There is no trying to make a person "see the light" and list all the things because the return answer will be, "But I love him". They will agree with you regarding, the list of things, and then end with, "But I love him.". The person needs to want to get out of the relationship, but if all they do is complain how awful everything but don't leave, then wasting your time being a emotional garbage dump. I tend to stay away from those types, it is frustrating and after awhile If listen to too much of this 'learned helplessness' I become completely unhinged with rage and drop them as a friend forever. Hate it when woman live in denial and don't do anything for themselves with trite excuses of why they stay.
"How do people allow themselves to be used? It is easy to see it in another person's life but not so with ourselves. When we see an emotionally abused person we think to ourselves that, "I would never let that happen to me because I am a strong individual" or we say that the person must have a very low self-esteem.
The problem is, at the beginning of a new relationship, the manipulation is subliminal. If they are good at it then it won't be noticed until long after a pattern in ingrained in the relationship. " - http://hub.me/a5I5n