my husband verbally and physically abuses me .what shall ido
Is my husband suffering from some mental problem ?
And when his name-calling has caused you to risk your emotional and physical health, or you have come to hate yourself, then you are absolutely involved with the verbally abusive man.
You need support. Marriage guidance councelling might help for both of you. However, it depends on your situation (kids etc) and the level of abuse as to the right action. Whatever, you need to talk about it with an impartial professional.
Have him arrested - he is a criminal - and move home so that he cannot find you when he gets out of prison. If you do nothing he may well kill you. Look at the statistics - most murders are committed within families - and within these it is generally husbands killing their wives.
I think you already know the answer to that question. There are two scenarios here.
1 - your husband abuses you in a shoving, perhaps outbursts of name calling anger sort of way
2 - your husband is full out abusing you, you've lost your self worth, you've lost your initiative, he leaves serious marks on you or causes you serious physical harm, and you receive an onslaught of verbal abuse that calls you down and makes you feel this [---] big.
a - you want to stay with him because you love him, and you know somewhere inside, he loves you back. You want things to go back to the way they once were, or you want things to be the way you know they can be. You want to know the way to make this stop and the way to get him back to the person you fell in love with. You shy away from the thought of leaving because you will feel guilty for leaving, as if you are not simply leaving the relationship, but you are hatefully discarding him from your life and leaving him to the wolves.
b - you want out, you need out, you try to get out and are stopped, you wish every day things would get better, but in that little tiny remaining piece of clarity way down in the bottom of your heart, you know they won't.
When it comes to kids, they are an extension of yourself. If you are being abused, they are being affected, if not also being abused. If you need to leave, so do they. You're not taking your children away from their father. You're protecting your children from someone who is hurting them and planting life long hurt in them.
I'm assuming that since you are asking for outside opinion that you are somewhere between a and b, which means you're still in a place where you can muster up what it takes, stand up for yourself, realize he's not the be all and end all of your life, nor are you of his, and leave the situation before it gets to a place you know it can go. If your husband has lost respect for you enough to be doing this to you, there is nothing you can do at this point to help him, except to leave, and insist that he get counseling. After that, it's a draw. You either give him a second chance when (and only when) you have confirmation from his counselor that he is better, or you leave and find yourself that little piece of happiness we all deserve to have.
Take care of yourself first and foremost or you won't be able to take care of anyone else.
You are the cake, he is simply the icing.
I'm not sure if you can do this or not, I'm new here and haven't looked it up. I wrote a hub on domestic violence from personal experience and thought maybe you'll find it, if not helpful at least interesting. If nothing else, you'll know you're not alone.
http://hubpages.com/hub/brokenapart
when any one beats of verbally abuses someone esle its a form a method rather often used to control the other party it is my beilfe that men who hit women have most likley sufferd from or seen abuse in themselves or someone they love this is a learned behavor like drug addiction it can become habblit forming leaveing the victim in a horrible situation. leaving him is up to you iam not going to tell you what to do you need to make that deshion for yourself if you feel you are in immaite dangor and your life is threatened then you need to go esle where for help. If you want to stay with him my suggestion is therapy and support groups many men deal with this issue and to many women fall victim of this cycle its a patern that needs to stop in oder for you and him to regain a happy and healthy marraige if he loves you he will own and get help for his issues the issue is always deeper than what it seems to be
by marketingskeptic 9 years ago
If you have a verbally abusive boss & can't afford to quit, what would you do?
by ngureco 11 years ago
Do You Consider It Manly For A Husband To Simply Pack And Leave His Wife Never To Come Back Again?The Man Would Usually Leave Without Word After Finding Their Marriage Relationship Isn’t Getting Any Better From His Sharp-Tongued Wife.
by Martie Coetser 13 years ago
Being a Christian, means being a follower of Jesus Christ. Not so? Does this means a Christian has to be a martyr, willing to DIE emotionally or physically in order for others to live, or to have a better life?In a marriage, should/may/must a Christian wife allows her husband to abuse her (and her...
by rosadisiervo 14 years ago
how do you function when your boss is a doctor and is verbally abusive. My body feels like a...ice, sometimes it feels like i don't know were i'm, it is very hard to concentrate and even difficult to breathe.
by William Thomas 13 years ago
No special expertise is needed for this question, of course. Just look deeply into yourself, and tell me what you think the connection is between language and thought (how have you noticed the cycle operate within yourself)? What role do you think it played in human evolution?Do you think the...
by jenniferness25 11 years ago
I have dreams of leaving my husband, What does that mean?
Copyright © 2024 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2024 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |