ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

My Battle with Autism

Updated on April 22, 2018


Hello. My Name is Erick Ivan Hernandez, but for this article, I'm going to use my real first and last name. I like to play Computer Games like World of Warcraft and Sim City 4 Deluxe Edition. I've lived in a group home that's been providing me with great care for the past 8 years. I've been to college twice but haven't figured out how to apply my guts to my college work.

I love to go out and have fun watching movies with friends and family. I have a flaw, though, and that's my behavior, but I'm working towards a goal to behave well. I want a girlfriend who can accept me for who I am and even though I behave badly, she'll still stand by me. I am also really good in computers. I can also do many things that normal people can't do. I can play World of Warcraft very well. So, that's it. That's my introduction.

Autistic Brain

This diagram represents the autistic brain in detail.
This diagram represents the autistic brain in detail.

What is Autism?

Autism is a disorder in which some parts of the brain are affected mentally, emotionally, and sociably in a massive way. If you want to find out more about autism, go here for the answer. Basically, the type of autism I have is normal. I am a highly intelligent autistic man, and I've been known to have an advanced brain.

In 8th grade, I was already studying the quadratic formula while studying Pre-Algebra at the same time. Autism Spectrum Disorder is, and has always been, quite exciting. I've gone from moderately severe autism back to a mild one thanks to therapy and help from my mom.


My mom told me that when I was a baby, I did not cry like most babies. I was quiet. Over the following months, my mom knew that something was amiss. So, over the next 3 years, my mom went to multiple doctors, but no doctors were able to explain what's going on with me. When I was 4 years old, I left the country where I was born to go to America to live there. My mom followed me home after 4 months of being separated from her. When I was 5, the doctors properly diagnosed me with Autism. By 1999, My mom got told by experts that I would not make it into High School and that if I did, I would need a special diploma, but my mom fought with them and started to care for me and fight with me to study.

Early Troubles

When I was 4 years old, I had what's called Echolalia. It's basically a fancy way of saying I repeated every word the adults said. I couldn't even speak right until around 6 years old. My mom taught me not to repeat words that the other adults said.

It took me a while, but by the age of 7 to 8, my speech got better. I started speaking in complete sentences, and it became easier for me to speak. Still, I had trouble speaking right.

I had trouble with the s sounds. Instead of saying snake, I said "thnake" and "I thaid the thong for the thcool dance" instead of saying "I said the song for the school dance." Obviously, it was a tough year. As I went on though, excitement came over me when my dad came on October 29, 2001. It was a day I'll never forget.

But before that, though, September 11, 2001, happened, and my mom was watching it all unfold live on TV, and my mom said to me, in Spanish, "Please Erick, don't watch it. It's too dangerous." My mom protected me well enough from that day. Even before that though, came a conversation that my mom told people multiple times.

Creation of another sibling (Kaesly)

When I was 7 or 8 years old, I was watching an episode of Jimmy Neutron titled, "I, Brobot" and I was sitting there wondering "I need another sibling"! So, I came up with my mom, and I said "I want a sister" and my mom said "you want a what? don't you want a brother or a doll?" and I screamed "I want a sister!!", so my mom said "fine, If that's what my son wants, then that's what my son shall get." On December 14, 2001, my mom and my dad remarried, and by January, my mom found out that she was pregnant.

So, one cold day in Miami, I sat down with my mom, and said "What are you going to name her?" and then she said "I'm going to name her Kaesly Barbara Hernandez", and I said "Why Kaesly?" and then she told me about a relative of hers whose last name was Kaeslyn and that she was originally going to put that name into the baby, but she dropped the "n" at the end to make it look cuter.

So, we waited 9 months for Kaesly to fully develop, and sure enough, on September 9, my mom went into labor, but complications arose on September 11 as she had Preeclampsia. They operated on her and out came baby Kaesly on September 11, 2002, which, ironically, was the 1 year anniversary of the September 11, 2001, attacks.

I visited Kaesly the day after. I remember that day very well. I had a cold that day, so that made it impossible for me to see her. I nearly got overwhelmed with excitement when I saw her for the first time. During the next couple of years, my sister was growing into the person I'd hoped her I would see. I helped her stand up at the age of 9 months. She walked soon after that, and she talked at the age of 18 months.

At the Age of 3 years, though, I told my mom that I wanted god to take my sister back. My mom told me "No, Erick. You wished for her, and you got her. Now deal with her"! I've dealt with her antics for almost 15 years as of this writing, but we mix well.

Kaesly (My Sister)

This is my sister in 2009 getting her communal
This is my sister in 2009 getting her communal

Middle School

In Middle school, I had a lot of help from my tutors and my mom, but my dad was ever vigilant on my behavior. Sometimes, my dad would just hit me with belt shots when I behave badly. Meanwhile, I have kept up with math and science. It's the other subjects in which I didn't have those kinds of good grades.

In the first half of 7th Grade, I had a lot of trouble concentrating in on stuff. I got obsessed and fell in love with a girl, and I fell in love with her in September of 2005. Also, we were in the middle of the worst hurricane season on record, so we had a lot of missed days.

I remember Katrina just battering the area in which I lived in on August 2005, and I was actually in the eye of Katrina. I experienced Katrina and Rita and Wilma. Wilma was very severe. There was a lot of damage to the neighborhood in which I lived in. That didn't stop me from obsessing over the girl, and my grades suffered for it. By January 2006, I got suspended, and then I got expelled because I couldn't handle my behavior. During the last 4 weeks of my McMillan days, I got hospitalized twice for bad behavior.

I then went to Paul Bell, where I made new friends almost immediately. There, I received medals for excellence in both science and math. I had A's in Math and A's and B's in Science. I also met friends from the past as well. Then came the hardest part....Graduation. I had to let go of many friends I've ever met. When I graduated from middle school, I graduated knowing that I would meet new friends in high school.

High School (Part 1)

In 9th Grade, I was lost, but a friend helped me find a way to survive high school. I was immediately put into a senior class (Web Design) and I had trouble with that class. That's the first time in which I made friends with seniors. Also, I found an old friend in the form of a man named Joshua. We were really good friends in 2001-2004 and I wanted to communicate with him, so I communicated with him on October of 2007.

In September of 2007, Antonio, another friend I was with in elementary school (a different one) invited me over to a friend's house and along came Daniel, a friend who was a fan of WWE. In June of 2007, I heard Antonio talk about WWE and I was not familiar with WWE, so I started watching it. Anyways, he showed me the way of WWE.

In November of 2007, Danny Invited me over to Best Buddies, a group in which I signed up in September of 2007 to experience a buddy. He told me about a meeting coming up on November 16, 2007. At the time, I accepted it. On November 16, 2017, I met a group of friends. Then, I met Gaby and Ximena, two really nice people who I thought were normal. But, over then next few months, I learned that they were lesbians.

Over the next couple of months, I struggled with comprehending that they were lesbians because I was in love with Ximena and not Gaby. Then, The next year started, and Ximena still visited the school, but not as much as she used to. Still, we communicated.

The other big story was that my behavior was so bad that my dad had to call my mom and force her to give me up to the group home. Eventually, by the end of June and the beginning of July, I moved out of my first group home into my current group home. On August, I decided to go into an all-black school named Norland Senior High School.

High School (Part 2)

When I went to Miami Norland Senior High School, I was alone once again, until I found some friends. During that time, I had my proudest achievement ever. since 2nd grade, I failed the reading FCAT and passed the Math FCAT. So, I took action. I went into reading camp and studied for the FCAT. When I took the FCAT, I read carefully to make sure I didn't make any mistakes. When I finished the FCAT, I had low confidence that I was going to pass.

In December, when the results came back, a friend said that I passed, but I did not believe her, at first. Once I got to the intensive reading class, I discovered that I had a 327, which is borderline Level 3, which meant that I passed the FCAT. I was crying with joy that night. But, then love struck me again.

In January 2010, during the coldest month on record in Miami, I fell in love with Shanice after she was crying, and I gave her a $20.00 bill for her birthday, but I took it back from her. What I didn't know was that she got sick very easily, so I just, in no regard to her health, followed her.

Over the ensuing months, I kept getting in trouble with her. I had C's in Math and A's and B's in Science. I had an F in Drama at one point, but I recovered nicely. I had B's and C's in forensics with my Forensic Science Teacher, and she was kind and gentle, but dissatisfied with the current generation of kids always disrespecting adults. By the beginning of 12th grade, I made a vow to only get A's in Science, which, at first sounded impossible, because I haven't gotten straight A's in a Subject through every 9 weeks including the midterm and the Final Exams

During the course of the year, I almost pulled off getting A's and B's in one 9 week Period. There was a C in that period. In the first half of the year, I had all A's in Science, including the midterm. During the 2nd half of the year, I got more A's and B's and C's and even a D in there as well. The only class that was constant was Science, which was A's throughout the board, so my science teacher of 2 years gave me a certificate of excellence.

Something happened to me that changed my life forever, it was Grad Bash time, and I didn't get to go. When I saw the images of people having a wonderful time, I got traumatized. I had an anxiety attack at high school. During that time, they hospitalized me. Then, prom came. I was expecting Shanice to come, but she didn't come. It was only after I left that she came. When I found out, I was mad. Then, I went to the hospital again for saying that I wanted to kill myself.

Then, came graduation. My Mom was there and the Special Education teacher came with me as well. I was graduating at the same time as another person, although we were getting different diplomas. I was getting a regular diploma and he was getting a special diploma.

We walked down the aisle, and we received our diplomas, and when we finished, we went out to eat. I told my mom that she believed in me no matter what and that she was the only one who believed in me, and she cried. It was a happy ending.

Mom's songs

Little known fact, my mom is a composer, an artist, and she can sing. She sings Spanish songs, so Hubpages, please don't cut these three videos. These songs mean something to her. There are three songs in which she has recorded just for her two children.

These first two videos are my songs, a special birthday present for my 18th birthday. I'll play the Telethon version. The Third video is a video of my sister and a song. The first song's called "Mi Pequeño Principe" (My Little Prince), the second song's called "Cuando Tu Crees en Mi" (When you believe in me) and the third song's called "Mi Hermosa Princesa" (My Beautiful Princess). She even edited the videos herself.

My Little Prince (Telethon) (Autism)

Rough Translation Of Mi Pequeno Principe

My little prince has eyes so deep like the ocean, a look so irresistible to copy, only understands truths of real things that God could only touch. He is not from this world, but he understands the language of universal love. My little prince, with your wings, you went and sheltered me, and with my touch of love, God came to your rescue, falling under the spell of motherhood. My prince is you, my sky is clear and blue, a lighthouse that guides me, my universe is you. My prince is you, my sky is clear and blue, a lighthouse that guides me, my universe is you.

My little prince, you are my child my angel with a golden heart, you only look at the way your life is getting so old (and better), nobody understands why are you getting so cold. You're not from this world, but you speak with love and with a mind and soul of gold. My little prince, times have changed, the two of us have grown, despite crying and suffering from your condition, I've always known that you are like one of my own. My prince is you, my sky is clear and blue, a lighthouse that guides me, my universe is you. My prince is you, my sky is clear and blue, a lighthouse that guides me, my universe is you.

My Little Prince. My Little Prince. My Little Prince is you.

When You Believe in Me (Autism)

Rough Translation of Cuando Tu Crees en Mi

Don't stop being the bridge between your world and mine. Don't let my voice be forgotten and be a distant memory. Don't stop having the strength and one thousand words of courage, when the sun rises each morning when you believe in me. Don't let my absence deter my future. Don't let my battles limit what I feel. Don't let ignorance deter me from my good spirits when the sun rises each morning when you believe in me.

When you believe in me when the wings of confidence take flight when we construct new worlds together with you, every day more sensible and more human. When you believe in me when the wings of confidence take flight when we construct new worlds together with you, every day more sensible and more human.

Don't let the years pass without making your mark, Don't let others come before me, Don't let other people know that special people are substandard when the sun rises each morning when you believe in me. Don't let history show that I'm not productive. Don't let my dreams be forgotten and incomplete. Don't stop letting me be who I am because you are my everything when the sun rises each morning when you believe in me.

When you believe in me when the wings of confidence take flight when we construct new worlds together with you, every day more sensible and more human. When you believe in me when the wings of confidence take flight when we construct new worlds together with you, every day more sensible and more human.

When you believe in me, the world is a better place.

My Beautiful Princess (Kaesly)

Rough Translation of Mi Hermosa Princesa

My beautiful Princess, my queen my rose, a cocoon of my joy, I have you in my heart. I only want you, my baby, to always be blissful, when the sky falls down on the earth, simply for you. When you grow up my wonderful princess, you will understand your mother better. I give handfuls of my life and my love. When I die I will be your angel and follow you anywhere. I know that by ear, that I'm proud of you.

I'm not wealthy (money), but I am wealthy in love. I'm going to teach you, my baby, to live with passion. Educate yourself (intelligence is key), reap the benefits of love. To be beautiful both mentally and emotionally, my princess, when you are older than about 35 years old.

When you grow up my wonderful princess, you will understand your mother better. I give handfuls of my life and my love. When I die I will be your angel and follow you anywhere. I know that by ear, that I'm proud of you.When you grow up my wonderful princess, you will understand your mother better. I give handfuls of my life and my love. When I die I will be your angel and follow you anywhere. I know that by ear, that I'm proud of you.

Because you are my princess, you are the digital impression of my love.


All of my high school achievements, including getting a Level 3 in the Reading FCAT and projects and everything, including every project that I worked hard for, and getting a 33 out of a 36 in the Science Portion of the ACT, plus everything else, including all my forensic work, are due in part to me, but mostly to my mom, the teachers who helped me at Norland, and the very good and wonderful angels of Toirak Group Home #3, including my Two friends at the group home. I would like to thank them for everything that has happened in high school, even though we fought a lot, they are really good angels.

Amazon Capsules.

Here are the amazon capsules that come with this hub. I encourage you to buy the products so that you can appreciate Autism a little more.

I Am Special (Spanish Edition)

Soy Especial (Spanish Edition)
Soy Especial (Spanish Edition)

This book is a personal book of mine. My mom made this book for me when I was very young. This book is for Spanish-speaking parents of autistic individuals.


Soy Especial (Spanish Edition)

All Spanish and Bilingual Readers are encouraged to read this to their autistic children.

Cuando Tu Crees en mi.

Cuando Tu Crees en Mi
Cuando Tu Crees en Mi

This song is one of three songs I showed you last year, but better. It's digitally remastered. The voices are correct, as well as the tone and pitch.Supposedly, an autistic kid was supposed to sing it. That kid would've been me, but I chickened out.


Cuando Tu Crees En Mi

This song was meant for an autistic individual to sing this song.

Mi Pequeño Principe.

Mi Pequeño Príncipe
Mi Pequeño Príncipe

My mom made this song for me on my 18th birthday. This song defines her undying love towards me. I want you to listen to this song very carefully. She put a lot of effort into making this song the most wonderful song ever.


Mi Pequeño Principe

This song is a personal favorite of mine. My mom made it just for me.

Mi Princesa

Mi Princesa
Mi Princesa

This is a song made by my mother to my sister. My mom put a lot of heart into this song for her.


Mi Princesa

This song was meant for my sister. My Mom loves my sister and I very much. She'd die if one of us got hurt.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Ivan Hernandez profile imageAUTHOR

      Erick Hernandez 

      7 months ago from Maintaining The Ivan Brand in Total Nonstop Ivan

      Thank you, Helen. I tried to translate the videos as best as possible.

    • HoneyBB profile image

      H Lax 

      8 months ago

      What a beautiful tribute to your Mom who I'm sure is incredibly proud of all you have accomplished. I hope your behavior has improved. You are an amazing writer and your story will help others who follow in your footsteps. I have two grandsons with autism and it helps me have a better understanding of what challenges they might face as they get older. Thanks for sharing.

    • LauraTallo profile image

      Laura Tallo 

      16 months ago from Louisiana

      I went through Katrina too! I really enjoyed your article. I used to teach autistic boys who lived in a group home.

    • Karen Hellier profile image

      Karen Hellier 

      17 months ago from Georgia

      I enjoyed reading this story very much, Ivan. I used to work in a high school with students requiring special education services. Many of them had some form of autism, so I am familiar with your struggles. Congratulations to you for graduating from high school. Your mom sounds wonderful and you are fortunate to have her in your life!

    • theraggededge profile image

      Bev G 

      17 months ago from Wales, UK

      Fascinating story, Ivan. I'm going to make two suggestions: 1. remove the surnames of all the people you mention (unless they are famous). Ordinary people may not like being written about without their permission. 2. Delete all but one of the Amazon capsules. They could make your article become unfeatured. Pick the best item and get rid of the rest.

      Good luck in your writing career.

    • Ivan Hernandez profile imageAUTHOR

      Erick Hernandez 

      2 years ago from Maintaining The Ivan Brand in Total Nonstop Ivan

      I remember you.

    • profile image


      2 years ago

      Do you remember me erick? im very Happy to see how you have grown up

    • Ivan Hernandez profile imageAUTHOR

      Erick Hernandez 

      2 years ago from Maintaining The Ivan Brand in Total Nonstop Ivan

      Thank you for your comment.

    • profile image


      2 years ago

      I congratulate you, you're a champion


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)