How to Be Confident in Society?
Worldly self-confidence is to be confident on your external achievements like wealth , social status, profession and good reputation.
There are two types of confidence, the first one is worldly self-confidence. A person feels worldly confident when he has everything he wants in life namely fame, social status, wealth, a noble profession and good reputation. In short, these means are actually source of confidence for him. But the moment he loses one of them he will be anxious and depressive. Worldly confidence is always filled with a sense of emptiness and a fear of loosing. Because no one can have a perfect life in world and no one can hold everything for very long.
Authentic self-confidence is to be confident on "Yourself".
Authentic self-confidence is to be confident on yourself , accepting all your flaws , love yourself without any condition , accept your mistakes and embrace yourself in any way. This is the true confidence we all need in our lives to achieve our goals.It will never lead us to dissatisfaction and despair but it will awake a new sense of positivity and kill negativity in us.
In the introduction of How to Transform Your Life, Venerable Geshe Kelsang Gyatso says:
‘Since this world evolved, human beings have spent almost all their time and energy improving external conditions in their search for happiness and a solution to their problems. What has been the result? Instead of their wishes being fulfilled, human suffering and problems have continued to increase while the experience of happiness and peace is decreasing. This clearly shows that until now we have not found a correct method for reducing our problems and increasing happiness.’
Boost Your Confidence.
If you feel anxious and depressive among people and can not communicate the way,you want, then you need to spend a little time on self-grooming and you should boost your confidence. There are several different ways to boost your self-confidence.
The first and foremost thing is to groom yourself. It doesn't mean that you need expensive dresses, hair gel, or shoes to do this, but it simply means that you need to do things which add goodness and style to your personality.
The second thing you need to do is dress nicely. When you wear a clean and nice dress, you yourself feel comfortable and confident.Dress nicely doesn't mean you need to wear a highly expensive dress, just a simple but clean and thoughtful dress is enough to glamorize your personality.
Thinking positively really help you to boost your confidence. Whenever something bad happens, try to emphasize the positive points, even if these are lesser in number. This kind of attitude will help you to remain positive and comfortable in life.
Be Kind and Spread Happiness
Be kind to others and if something troubles you then leave it and move on, instead of thinking it hundreds of hours just leave it. Don't talk rudely to anyone, If you don't like someone, just say your greetings and walk aside, after a while, they will also realize that you don't wanna see them and they will stop troubling you. Live your life in the way you want and don't let anyone hold the pen of your future. Always remember one thing that authentic self-confidence is different from worldly self-confidence because it is long lasting while worldly self-confidence is fleeting.Authentic self-confidence is to spread happiness in the world on the other hand worldly self-confidence is to find happiness for yourself only.
Talk to Yourself
This sounds crazy but it actually works. Those things, you don't feel confident about, just talk to yourself. After trying it you will feel less embarrass about those same things. Say your flaws to yourself, be your own mentor, listen to your worries carefully and then take a decision with thoughtfully.