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Refuse to fight small battles with small, petty people. Your Life is bigger than that!

Updated on March 10, 2018
Pam Morris profile image

Writing is my passion. I have an undying thirst and quest in the field of writing.Some eat, smoke, drink or use drugs when stress, I write.

All of us have dealt with small, petty people before as they are, those individuals who are focused only on themselves. Most of them have this attitude “poor me” as they tend to be consummate victims to try to excuse their inappropriate behaviors. Small, petty people are good at garnering pity and attention from those around them. We all must keep in mind that we cannot “fix” someone else because in an attempt it will only bring us down in the process, rather than lifting the other person up and doing. We cannot let other actions, rewards and encourages bad behavior, in short, refuse to fight small battles with small petty people. Your Life is bigger than that.

Being the daughter of a preacher, I was taught to love everybody and be subject to an authority figure. I grew up in a conservative Christian family that had family values, so I was shaped to know my role.

In a traditional Christian family, such as mine, the father was always the go-to person, and his word was the law. As a result, the role of a female was nothing more than an assistant to the authority mentioned above figure. That is why I never saw my mother refuse my father.

Not that I am complaining, it is just that you need to know how to deny a person if his wishes are going against yours, if the situation impedes your ability to learn and experience new things. The wisdom comes from the way you say it and, more importantly, how you say it.

I could not even imagine my mother refusing authority figure; there wasn’t also an inkling of opposition in my mom’s behavior. Nevertheless, in situations in which she did not agree with my dad, she would still manage to dominate him with such elegance that father did not even know what hit him.

What my mom was doing is refusing to fight small, petty battles that will get the greatest of her, she knew how to decide deliberately which battles are worth fighting. Also, she understood the power of a peaceful way to live; she never overreacts to small, petty things that will create more significant problems. Her life was so much more extensive and better than that.

One of the aspects of our lives that a good number of individuals are not able to handle are which battles are worth fighting and which one they should walk away and not fight. They look for problems even when there’s nothing to fight about. The question is why is it hard for some people to decline small, petty people who will distract them from their significant, meaningful purpose?

The reality is that for some people they feel uncomfortable to have a day without any friction. You have the power to be able to make the choices to feel alive without needing to fight someone to feel important. The reality is that, if you cannot say no to small, petty battles and walk away, you are only betraying yourself. There is a famous quote that says: “Knowing when to walk away, is wisdom. Being able to is courage. Walking away with your head held high is dignity."

What I have learned from being self-employed is that, in most of the cases, I behaved as a “yes” woman. Unfortunately, what I have also learned the hard way is that giving an affirmative answer does not necessarily bring a positive result. Occasionally, refusing the offer is much more profitable than taking it. Putting a high front is what distinguishes successful from an unsuccessful business woman or man.

Know How to Deal With Small, Petty People: It's one thing to deal with small, petty people in your everyday life, but to have to work with them in the workplace is something entirely different and can be annoying, you need to know how to deal with them. Don't ever allow small, petty people to anger or make you have disruptive behavior; you are bigger than that.

While at work we all want to be respectful and steer our conversations toward the task at hand, but we can't control co-workers around us, and some can't avoid being small and petty. Here are a few tips on what to do to deal with small, petty people. Be still and stay grounded, never engaging in toxic behavior. Know when to talk and when to be silent and last know how to take responsibility for our circumstances in the work force and small, petty people lose their power over you.

Is it hard for you to refuse someone? Do you find other people’s happiness more important than yours? The most important thing for you is to learn how to oppose someone and stick to it through thick and thin while pushing all the negativity to the other side.

When your boss asks you to perform a task that is way beyond your reach or to do something that will compromise your chance of success, refusal is the best way to go. However, while doing it, keep the positive attitude and don’t present yourself as disobedient. The way you show it is the way he/she will perceive it. Do not try to share anything with your manager no matter how compelling it might be. It is not wise to make an obligation that you cannot fulfill because If you do, you are expected to perform it. But be glad if someone gave you that respect to ask you to complete a significant task. In any case, don’t take it all upon yourself to try when you can’t succeed.

It is better to refuse someone, even a friend or a relative, in situations when you are sure that you cannot accomplish the task given. From my experience, it is better to keep your thought to yourself in these cases. Think twice before you make a promise and don’t do it in situations when you know you cannot deliver. Being able to refuse or to say no in a proper mannered way could make most of our problems go away and in short always refuse to let small, petty people distract you from your significant, meaningful purpose.

Do you agree it best to refuse to fight small battles with small, petty people life is bigger than that?

See results

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© 2015 Pam Morris

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