Multigenerational Family Living
One Roof - Three Generations
More than 6 million American families ( Via AARP), that's 1 in 20 households. have more than two generations living in the same home. And my family is one of those. For my family and for many other families, what might have started as just a answer to a problem or crisis, turns out to be one of the positive joyful experiences of a lifetime.
Most of us think of the past when we think of granny and gramps living with their children and their children's children. But there is a very modern and increasing trend of merging families under one mulitgenerational roof. Largely thought of due to the latest economical crisis but really for a multitude of very good reasons.
For us to come to this decision it was mostly economical. I had been laid-off from a high paying job and had tried to start my own business. When the housing market crashed my home went into the foreclosure process. With the added challenge of getting hired again as a 50+ woman in an already difficult job market pushed me into considering alternative solutions. My son and daughter-in-law offered to let me live in their guest suite. However, this situation turned into something beneficial to the entire family.
As a young two-income upwardly mobile family, my son and their wife were always struggling with day care, school drop offs and pick ups, after school activities, and just the day to day care of a busy family. My new career as a real estate agent gave me the flexibility to step in when needed. And having a loving family member as their stand in gave them a sense of security.
As for me, well, I was raised in a Multigenerational household. My single mother raised me and my siblings in her Parents home. We felt loved, cared for, and the luckiest kids around. Now I get the chance to enjoy not only observing my son and his young family grow and thrive but be an active and welcome participant which is the greatest gift I could ever imagine.
Why a Multigenerational Household?
What Are You Daffy?
I get this response all the time. But there are many very sane and excellent reasons to create a multigenerational household. Any particular family will have their very own specific reasons but here are a few of the most often stated.
*Unmarried 20-Something children are choosing to live with their parents while finishing completing education, getting settled into careers, economic related or just by choice
*Immigration. Immigrants are more likely to live in a multigenerational household.
*An aging population. Fortunately the Baby Boomer generation are more financially stable and are able to offer their parents a safe loving home in their old age and at the same time provide a place to live to their own children.
*Economic - Sharing household bills and expenses can offer a solution to many economic issues and help family members save for future large purchasing events.
*Child Care - Many parents prefer to have a loving grandparent or other relative as a secondary child care provider for small children and teens.
The Return of the Mulit-Generational Family
Guides for Successful Multigenerational Living
My 5 Best Tips to a Successful Multigenerational Household - Space, Space, and More Space
- All adults (even include older children) should have a clear understanding and agreement on the particulars of the situation. Everyone should be on the same page as to why the family is doing this and how.
- Determine the responsibilities or each individuals. Who pays what bills or portions of bills. Who maintains the home, takes care of the children or elderly parents, who shops, and who cooks.
- Allow the parents to handle the parenting Is should clearly be agreed upon first as to who and how discipline will handled. Also I would suggest a family meeting policy where the adults can discuss household issues such as any possible disciplinary issues that effect the entire household.
- Privacy and boundaries. Grandma's room should be respected by all as well as a married couples quarrels and discussions.
- Take a breath and count to 10..maybe 20. Now is the time to be calm, listen more than you speak, let others live their own lives, and let things roll of your back.
The Family That Sticks Together
Tip # 3
Let Parents Raise Their Own Kids.
This can be a big source of discourse. But all adults must agree to let the parents be the parents.
Famous Families Living Multigenerationally
There are some very famous households that choose to live with several generations under one roof.
Fictitious or Real, some Good Examples some Bad.
1. President and First Lady Obama. Obviously the Obama's did not ask the First Lady's mother to join them at the White House for economic reasons. There situation was one of wanting a loving grandmother to help stabilize a challenging transition.
2. The Walton's. A story based on a real family during the great depression, a very real reason to form a multigenerational household. The TV series often showed the wisdom of Grandma and Grandpa being a huge benefit. And do you remember that huge caring family sitting around the family dinner table, hashing out their day's problems and successes.
3.Joan and Melissa Rivers. When Joan Rivers moved to Los Angels again, instead of purchasing her own L.A. condo, she moved in with the single daughter Melissa and her son Conner. A hilarious and successful realty show ensued. Joan Knows Best
Multigenerational Families on T.V.
The best example of Multigenerational Living
Modern Version of a 3 generation household
How to Live with Your Parents for the Rest of Your Life
Great new comedy based on the Multigenerational Family Trend.
Don't Forget to Have Fun
Whether for just a few short months or for years to come, the most important thing is to have a good time. Enjoy the situation while you can. Take pictures, give hugs and kisses. Make time for special family fun. Set aside one day a week for family game night, movie night, even theme dinner night. This is your family, love it.