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Funny Mother's Day Poems & Jokes

Updated on March 17, 2014
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Mother’s Day is coming, so how are you going to thank the person who gave birth to you? She deserves so much because she has done so much.

From giving birth (which by the way is a very, very long, painful, difficult process) to teaching you how to walk, talk, sing nursery rhymes, your abc’s, manners, how to tie your shoes, what to wear, what not to wear, to scream and run away from spiders, how to cook, how to clean (perhaps for her personal gain, but hey) and the list goes on and on.

Basically, she has taught you how to live, while you taught her patience (i.e. she still has some hair, right?), how to clean faster than kids can make messes (i.e. supermom), how to operate on little or no sleep (i.e. mombie mode), and you forced her to grow a pair of eyes on the back of her head (yes, moms really have those)!

The least you can do is give her a nice day that is all about her for once, where she can kick her feet up and not have to cook or clean anything.

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Poems for Mom

Okay, but let’s be real here. Maybe she can’t have all of that on Mother’s Day, but giving her a few laughs can at least make her day more enjoyable!

Funny Mother’s Day poems are the perfect way to say thank you and make her laugh, all in one long (or short), rhymey message!

Here’s a list of five funny Mother’s Day poems that are sure to make her day:

What are you going to do for Mom this Mother's Day?

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Food

Deatest Mom,
Her cooking's divine,
So delicious,
I must make it all mine.

Meatloaf and spaghetti,
Chicken soup and apple pie,
Whatever she's makin'
I'm excited inside!

Cheesy, crunchy, & yummy,
Not a crumb tastes bad,
But even if it did,
I’d only tell dad!

Never Leaving the Nest

Mom, I know you do a lot
Like cooking all the food,
washing dirty laundry,
to detecting my bad moods.

I try to do my part, too
in between playing my video games
like taking out the trash
and washing the window panes.

Mom, I know that you’ll be saddened
when I have to leave the nest
But right now, I’m only 33
and living at home is the best!

Always Something

Kids are napping,
the house is quiet.

Finally you can pee alone.
Relax on the toilet
and let all go,

Drat! An empty roll!

Mom's the Bomb

It’s Mother’s Day
so, thank you, mom!
I hope you know
that you’re the bomb!

But seriously though
I’ve watched you unload,
pushing every button I could
to make you explode!

I love you lots
I meant no harm.
Growing up with you
was life’s greatest charm!

Beautiful Supermom

Mom is a super hero
who needs no cape,
because no matter what
she can save the day.

Missed busses,
forgotten lunches,
hard punches
from mean punks

and...

Let’s not forget
the hard work she’s done
to raise us kids
without gaining a ton.

We love you mom,
you’re beautiful, no fuss!
You’re the best there is
so thanks for having us.

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Jokes for Mom

Maybe you’re just not a poet. That’s okay! Telling a cute, funny mother’s day joke can certainly make her spirit light up with laughter. Try one of these:

Mommy Clock

What did the baby digital clock say to the mother clock? Look mom, no hands!

Mommy must have been hungry...

Jack, in kindergarten, was always talking to his teacher about how excited he was that he has a little sister on the way. One day when Jack’s mother let him feel the baby moving in her tummy, Jack stopped talking about his soon-to-be little sister in school. His teacher asked, “Jack, you haven’t talked about your little sister in a while, has she been born?” Jack teared up and replied, “No, I think my mommy ate her!”

Writing funny Mother’s Day poems or jokes is typically a welcomed way to lighten the mood with your mother, even after many years of pushing buttons that she probably didn’t even know she had.

So, along with a funny Mother’s Day poem, give her a card, a hug, and a big thank you! Really, it is the very least you can do!

Happy Mother's Day!

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