A Prayer Award for my Lil Sis.
As I sit here on Christmas Eve, alone, and thinking of the few presents I have this year, not for me mind you, but for my kids, and none for the rest of my family, money has been tight and the times tough. And I felt a sadness overwhelming in my heart, one of those that seeps in and almost takes your breath away, and thinking to myself what am I going to do this year for those other special people in my life.
I have nothing to give them, and wish that I could think of a way to show how much I appreciate them. I glanced out my bedroom room and watched the snow tumbling down in its brilliant white covering spreading across the fields, thinking it is going to be a White Christmas this year! And wishing I could celebrate with a more joyful heart, instead of feeling like the Grinch! And wandering back and forth between Christmas, prayers and God, and that led me to thinking of all the prayers I have said over the years, and wondering at times why God doesn’t seem to answer those prayers, well at least some of them. Sometimes I wonder if he is listening. Sometimes I wonder if he cares. Don’t get me wrong, I know he does, but at times it really makes you wonder. I have had many prayers answered but some of the most important ones are the ones we desperately need at times. Sometimes I wonder if his line is busy and perhaps it would be better to “call” back at another time. I already left him many “voice mails”.
See, the prayers aren’t all for me, they are for my family and my lil sis Ang, and I was hoping and praying that he had one of those give-away contests like you see on Oprah, or Tyra. You know the kind I am talking about, those kind where you can send in your letter and explain why you want this for that special person in your life. Why they deserve some miracle of hope in their life. Because if anyone deserves something special in their life, I am sending him one for my baby sister! I didn’t have any money to buy her anything this year and I prayed hard that God would send her something special because I sure couldn’t. And I believe that she should get an award for all her dedication, and the differences she makes in our lives, those lives around her, and some far away. Do you think there are contests in heaven? I hope so, because I am going to put my entry in right now!
This is my entry for my baby sister God, and the reasons why I would you like you to consider her for this special award of miracles. It really is quite simple you see, I think she deserves it and she is the most important person in my life. ( Besides my kids, mom and her kids.) I didn’t have any money this year to buy her anything for Christmas. I know it is the thought that counts, but God if I could count all those “thoughts” I would be rich by now! And no I am not asking for money, (Well you can always send money too!) I am asking for some of those miracles, you know the kind that only you can provide. She is the most wonderful giving person that I have ever had the privilege of meeting, let alone being lucky enough to have her as my baby sister. She has always been the type of person that puts herself last, giving to those in need, and always the first one to be there in my times of need. And as you very well know God, there have been LOTS of those times! Every year all throughout I watch her collect her goodies and treats for her “Christmas Child” project boxes. Always finding the coolest stuff to send to needy children all over the world, and even when they are full, she still wants to do more. She would lavish presents on all the needy children if she could. That is just her way. And the other charities she supports, she never says a word, just gives from her heart with the money she has. And taking care of the family in her own special way, running errands and making sure that everyone’s needs are fulfilled. And we all know how much she hates running errands God! But I know that if I need her in the darkest of night, she is there. I know if I need her in the early morning light, she is there. She is always there for any of us when we call, giving us what she can, her time and her unconditional love.
She is going through some tough times right now God, and she sure could use the support, with John being stricken with MS, and him not being able to work, she has been doing all she can to help the family out in her special ways. But then I watch her when we go out into the world, and people asking how is John, and I wish they would think of her too. I wish they would take the time to ask her how she is doing, and if there is anything she needs. I know how tough is it for her to take care of everyone, and to be the one who drives this person and that person all over the country, making appointments, doing errands, and the many other things she has to do. You know God, you are the one who blessed me with her, and that is why I am entering this contest. I would like her nominated for the most special person in my life award. Because she is, she is like my hero, that only you could create. You gave her a giant heart God, with such an empathic nature that she bleeds for all of us with her gentle heart at times.
And the way she is with her grandchildren that is truly a sight to behold! She loves those babies with every fiber of her being, and if she could give them the world, she would, laying it at their feet. Just as she would wish for her two sons, that same loving devotion I watched her give them all these years, through trials and tribulations, through happiness and sadness. Through joy and gladness, through upsets and downfalls, for her it never ends, nope, not her love. And I am not talking about mere material possessions, I am talking about providing them all with the things they need in their lives, to make their lives a better place. That is her way God as you very well know, that she wants all her loved ones protected, and blessed, their diseases and disorders gone, warm houses to live in, enough food to eat, the simple, no more pain in their worlds. And God, how about if the same was returned to her as your words speak, that really isn’t too much to ask for, is it?
I have never seen a woman with so much love in her heart, to engulf us all in her loving embrace! And it never wavers God, no matter what. I think she is the reason this ole Grinch has so much love in hers. Because of her baby sister, and having it shared all these years. You certainly gave her an abundance God when you were handing out those hearts. I know at times it has been a curse for her, because she feels things so deep and intense, but for those that know my baby sister, it is a blessing. To know that no matter how close or how far, she will love you for who you are, not for what others think you should be. She just loves with everything she is. And what a rare trait that is! I have often envied that someone could give so selfless, but I have known her for 45 years and I have seen it many times over and over. So how about throwing some miracles her way this coming up year God? Please? If anyone deserves them, she does. And not only because she is my baby sister, but what she stands for, love, unconditional and pure, not saying there are not faults, but those don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.
I know at times God she feels like The Disappearing Lady, and that has made me sad, not for me, but for her, because everyone needs their moments to shine! And shine to me she does, every time I see her smile, hear her laughter, see her tears, knowing that she feels pain much deeper than most. But even in that she shines, for I see the worry etched in her eyes, the care in her heart, and the breaking of it at other times. We have so many private jokes that no one else would understand, and during my life at some of my lowest peaks, she would be there making me laugh, holding my hand, seeing me through some of those darkest moments. And she never asks for anything God, not for herself. Not in that way that some people do, she only wants what is best for her family. And she tries so hard, putting herself last.
It hasn’t been easy for her God, and the things she needs are pretty simple for someone like you. I do not have to tell you what miracles I am talking about, you already know. But this is my Christmas wish for her; one of those gifts that just keep on giving. We were taught as children, to have faith as one, and she does, even though she is now grown. That faith that perhaps is simple, and of the little child, but that is all that is needed, I truly believe.
So this is why I am asking for this special award, (prayer) God, that you bless her this upcoming year. That she may have some miracles tossed her way, this I beg you please. For if there was anyone who deserved this, it is my baby sister. I know, I know I am biased a bit, but I will always feel protective of her I can’t help it God, it is my nature. For I love her just as much as she loves me. And I wish that I could load her up myself with miracles, but I don’t have that ability God, that is why I am coming to you. I am not asking for much, all I am asking for is that you can throw her some miracles, and maybe a hot tub too?! We all know how much she wants one of those, so she can ease her pain away, not for the enjoyment of it, but for her physical pain. And God, I also like that song, “The Winds Beneath my Wings”, every time I hear that song, it reminds me of Ang, so can we play that at the ceremony too?
So please God, I nominate her for “The Most Special Person in my Life” Award, because she is.
Laur (The Big Sis)