A bad start to a New Year
I was watching the News on New Years eve day and there was a man on there that said that there is a new approach to the New Year being taken up by thousands of people to live this New Year as the last year of your life.
I thought about it for a few minutes and even went to the website. It really made sense to me and I even told my mom about it. This was the first New Years eve I had ever had that actually went ok. No more alcoholic husband, our divorce is over. No more drama in my life, I just lost my job. My life was actually pretty uneventful New Years eve and then all of the sudden 3 days later, it seems like it is one thing after another.
I don't even know why I am writing this, I guess I am hoping someone out there has a magical answer for my life that will fix everything. Are you there? Can you hear this plea for help?
I have gone from being a normal mother and wife, with a home and nice car and job, to a woman that is divorced, left out in the country living in a 120 year old rental house with chickens in the yard. I have lost my car, lost my job, lost my saving due to the divorce, and all I really have left is my children and cat. I am really grateful to have my children and my cat, but living out here with nothing is feeling very hopeless right now. There is no work, not even at the gas station and all of my college is not helping find anything within 50 miles.
I cannot keep my direct tv, I cancelled my cell phone service, my internet is the only good thing left that I have and I really cannot keep it as I do not even know how I am going to pay my rent this month.
So, here I am.
I woke up to a sermon from Joel Osteen on tv this morning. He said to drive in a nice neighborhood and envision myself liviing there and it will come. That God will bless me and provide the things I need in my life. I am sitting here picturing myself living in a normal house that is not filled with spiders and cold air, to something that has a fireplace and carpet. I am picturing myself owning my own store in town, taking the kids to school in our new car, and having a washer that works.
I am really doing this! I want change so badly I don't know where to start. I don't know what to do. I tried Ebay last week thinking that would help make some extra money, and it cost me more to list what I had for sale than I made. I really don't have anything left to sell.
Would someone please tell me something? Tell me what direction to take in life. What would you do if you woke up tomorrow with nothing? How would you get your life back?