ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

A reflection on my father and on being a father

Updated on December 8, 2015

Happy Father's Day

Fathers and the love we hold for our children

I have many fond memories of my dad and as I think back to my younger days I realize how he helped me in becoming a better person. I also must acknowledge my mom for she too played a major role in my life. My dad was a hardworking iron worker and very devoted husband and father. I grew up in Brooklyn, New York with 2 sisters who I have much love and respect for. We all have very busy lives but when we talk about our parents we all feel the same way. We all have a connection to them and know we have gained so much from their love and their commitment in raising us.

A father and son bond is a very special one and I always felt loved by my dad even though he could never say it. He spoke it with his actions. He was a very supportive father and encouraged me in every aspect of my life. I will always cherish the times he would drive me to my baseball games. It was just me and my dad and I remember those times as if they were yesterday. I loved playing baseball and my dad knew how much it meant to me so he always made sure he gave me good advice and always reinforced that it was a game and I should have fun and not burden myself with the pressures we sometimes feel in having to prove our-self. He guided me with his wisdom and he was always there cheering me on and celebrating with me when I made a great catch or got a clean base hit. These are the lasting memories that remind us of how truly special it is to have a dad or someone in our life that we can look up to.

During our childhood years it seems like the time will last forever and we will always have our mom and dad with us every step of the way and if we are lucky enough we will up through our young adulthood. In the back of our minds though we will have to face the prospects of having to say goodbye and live our own lives. We will have learned a great deal through the years and if we are so blessed we will live with our parents memories in our hearts always.

My recollections of my dad are what bring comfort and feelings of happiness to my life and I try to follow in his footsteps in being a loving and caring father towards my son. He has provided me a moral compass that I have lived with in my daily life and has taught me to always listen, obey and respect. I have tried to live within the boundaries that we set in being a decent person, showing respect and compassion for others and being responsible in all aspects of our life. I have learned this since I was a child and I have adopted it into my life. My only wish in life though is that I wish I had not felt so painfully shy which has held me back at times and limited me to some degree. My dad taught me to always trust in myself and my mother always taught me to believe in myself and in the miracles of having faith in God, our true inspiration.

Sometimes when life seems hard I wish i could go back to my childhood to a time and a place when I felt safe and protected. Now I am the protector and I have to be strong in my mind and my actions as I have a responsibility to my son. To me fatherhood is the best gift I have ever been given and I owe special thanks to my wife, to our son and to God for making it all possible. I have been blessed and I realize this each and every day. I am not a perfect father but I know in my heart I am trying to be as loving and caring to my son as I possibly can. From the day our son was born and I peeked in on him as the nurse was cleaning his tiny little feet and hands I was a changed man and I knew from that day on I would love my son and nurture and provide for him until my dying day. I was very emotional when I saw him for the very first time and saw him cradled in my wife's arms soon after she gave birth. I cried tears of joy and I was deeply moved by the miracle of birth. It is something you will never forget and you wish those very special feelings will last forever.

The road in life we take is hopefully long and very satisfying. There will be winding and bumpy parts but with love and trust we will manage and get to a grand place. We are special in that we have the capacity to express ourselves and each tell a story. Our story in life will revolve around our children and our loved ones and those who provided and cared for us as we provide and care for ours. It will give us a renewed sense of who we are and why we are here. We have been given a tremendous gift many times over as we were lucky enough to come into the world and lucky enough to experience the beauty and miracle of precious life that will make us appreciate what our life is all about.

As a father I have come to understand what love truly means and what is required of a parent. We all have to have patience and understanding and the ability to deal with all that comes our way. Our child is our precious gift and we must do all we can in raising them to be confident, happy and healthy young adults. I have learned that all children are special and love will always find a way know matter how difficult the challenges that lie ahead. Raising a son with autism has taught me many things and it is constant learning each and every day and I must realize that even at the lowest points we must be strong for our child needs us and they also need to feel loved and heard. Even if they can't speak with their voice we must show them the way so they can express themselves and tell us what is going on in their life. I have realized this when I created my blog "A Father's Love, My Son and Autism". This is what my story is about. It is about my family and our son who is our priority and our main focus and we must provide him our very best as he navigates life with challenges we never had to deal with.

As I try to provide insight, encouragement and help my son in believing in himself I am struck by his innocence and his courage and I truly believe that he will make strides in his life and achieve great things. I love my son and I try to tell him this every day even when he pushes me away.

The funniest thing I remember in growing up is how my father shied away from discussing matters of the heart. He did say however that there was a girl out there for me and I don't know her yet but one day I will and we will both celebrate our lives together. He would always have me talk to my mother about girls and I remember how my mom would be so sweet in hearing me out about the many girls I had crushes on from the first grade on. It was so innocent but to me it was everything. Now as my son becomes a teenager I have to be mindful and respectful and learn to listen as he grows and experiences frustrations, pressures, school placement and matters of the heart involving girls. We all go through this and would think that we would be better at giving advice then actually going through it because we already have. I am very proud to be a father and I think back to the days I sought advice from my dad and I try to instill in my son the same moral values I learned. I remember that childhood poem that my parents had hanging in our kitchen about what a child learns and I have grown to memorize it and learn from it in teaching my son. He is our greatest joy and he is the center of our life which makes everything come into focus.

Thank you for allowing me this precious gift of fatherhood. I will accept this role with love, understanding, patience, joy, compassion, commitment, sincerity, hope, wisdom and heartfelt emotion and with the hope that my wife and I will see our son achieve all he wishes in his life. We look forward to watching him graduate high school, seeing him off to college, living through his experiencing his first loves, his successes, his triumphs, his joys, his heartbreaks and one day seeing him dance with his future bride. This is every parent's hope. May we live to see our son achieve all these wonderful things and spend many happy times together as a family. God Bless you Matthew!

Love, Dad

Edward D. Iannielli III

Harry Chapin - Cat's in the cradle

In the living years - Mike and the Mechanics

A child learns to live


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)