ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Five Halloween Costumes For Boys With Hipster Parents

Updated on October 4, 2011

Hipsters are not like regular parents

As hipsters have grown older and started to reproduce, they've quickly created a young generation of hipster offspring. These children, like their parents, are not like regular children. They are only allowed to watch television shows and movies ironically, which means they can't watch what's popular unless they do so with an air of superiority over the masses who just want some genuine entertainment.

Each year when Halloween rolls around the hipster parents are presented with a new challenge: how can they draw attention to their child's costume without just dressing them up in whatever costume is popular that year? Any kid can be Harry Potter, but what are some costumes that none of the other children will "get" but at least some of their parents will?

Let's take a look at some costume ideas for children of hipster parents. For now I'll stick to just boys or unisex costumes, but when I find some more I'll try to do a special list just for girls.

5. The $100 bill costume

It's greedy. It's arrogant. It's a statement on the decline of western society and class warfare. None of these are things than young children will understand, but they'll enjoy being dressed up as a piece of money. The child wearing this costume will likely request the cash equivalent of candy when trick-or-treating. Enjoy it while he's young -- next year he's planning to dress up as Gordon Gekko.

4. The Man-Eating Shark

This one makes the list because it's unnecessarily violent yet it allows us all to have a good laugh at the death of a fellow human being. Hipsters love it because the shark, which was probably starving thanks to the destruction of its habitat and its natural food sources, is taking revenge on the human, who was probably just some tourist trying to take a picture to post on his Facebook wall.

3. The Whoopie Cushion

This costume is fun because it's an item that imitates flatulence. It says "sit on my kid and he'll make a farting noise". My lower class parents wouldn't let me own a whoopie cushion when I was a kid because they thought it was "beneath us". Now people are actually dressing their kids up as these things. What a world we live in!

2. Ghostbusters

Most small children today don't care about Ghostbusters. Most of them don't even know what Ghostbusters was. They are totally baffled by their parents weird obsession with Bill Murray, and why they go hungry some nights while their parents are busy filling out petitions on the internet to get "them" to make Ghostbusters 3. This retro costume was one of the most popular Halloween costumes... 25 years ago! The franchise that died a long time ago is still alive and well in the minds of nostalgic hipster parents.

1. Retro Batman Batsuit

Who cares if all the other kids are going to be dressed as the dark and broody Batman from the Christopher Nolan movies? The cool kids will be the retro Adam West Batman, with the either the black or the blue cape and the tights (is that underwear being worn on the outside of his pants?). This is the Batman that existed 40 years before the children who will be trick-or-treating this year were born, which makes it fun for all the older parents and probably none of the children. KA-BOOOM!

Comments

Submit a Comment

  • Dolores Monet profile image

    Dolores Monet 

    6 years ago from East Coast, United States

    Mr. Cooper, you are hilarious. Funny that you mention the Ghost Busters costume. Not long ago, I discussed that very concept with my grown sons. In these hard economic times, when people in the know suggest that we all start our own business, I though that a ghost hunting/busting business would be just the thing. Ghost sightings and house possessions are on the rise, and I think that such an enterprise would be hugely successful. We could buy some of these costumes at discount on November 1st. However, we could run into some copyright infringement problems.

  • AEvans profile image

    Julianna 

    6 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

    Oh how funny! lolo! The dollar bill? But they re great ideas. mmmmmmm..... Lololo! :D

  • cjcarter profile image

    cjcarter 

    6 years ago

    Love the costume descriptions! HIlarious!

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)