Funny Things to Write in a Bridal Shower Card
Funny Lines, Blurbs or Sayings You Can Write in a Bridal Shower Card
1. You are officially up the creek without a paddle, row row row your boat gently down the stream, marriage, marriage, marriage, marriage, will sometimes make you scream.
2. Don't worry, when you're married not everyday will be good, but forget about all that, cause today is suppose to make up for it and last you a lifetime.
3. They call it a Bridal Shower 'cause it's suppose to be clean, but we've decided a little filth is necessary for this one.
4. We're celebrating your soon to be new title of 'Mrs.' - actually we're calling this a going away party.
5. When you get married you give up your purity. Ok, we couldn't stop laughing either! Congrats.
6. If you think marriage is the right move, then we're here to cheer you on into battle!
7. Sometimes loving someone means saying 'I Do' and sometimes loving someone means saying 'I Don't'. Looks like you're loving someone.
8. Come on man! Why do you have to go on and do something so drastic as getting married! You could just say you did and don't!
9. I'm so happy for you, you're going to make a beautiful bride, it's the Godzilla wife you're gonna become that should scare the crap out of him.
10. You are creating another line to your family's ancestry, is that wise?
11. You are being showered before you become a bride, that's cause most brides-to-be need cleaning.
12. The reason you're getting married has been spreading like wild fire, that's 'cause we're making *hit up behind your back! We're helping you here, we're trying to put a scar on your perfect, angelic reputation. Nobody is that clean. You don't need a Bridal Shower, you need Bridal mud wrestling.
13. Why are you getting married? Ignore us we're totally jealous about all the gifts you're going to get.
14. He's the apple of your eye, or is he the boot up your *ss?
15. When we know better we do better, looks like you finally figured that little quote out.
16. Congrats, you nabbed yourself the hottest dude in town. You obviously have skills none of us were aware of.
17. Can you give us some tips on how to get us a guy just like you did? Or you could just raffle yours off to one of us? No? Ok, just spitballing.
19. You've gone the distance, you're almost at the finish line. Actually it's the new start line. Your beginning is the end of our childhood. Give that some thought!
20. The gifts you get today are meant to make up for those nightmare days of marriage! Just kidding, we know you're the boss and the nightmares will only be his.
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21. Time heals all wounds, but once you get married, all bets are off!
22. Congratulations on getting tagged, pretty soon you'll be out.
23. You've won the best man, just remember on your wedding day to marry the right best man
24. Let's go two out of three to see who gets him
25. I'm so jealous you're marrying him! I'm fuming mad! How come you get everything you want, and I get nothing! Why? Just tell me why? Never mind I know it's because you're hard to resist. I can't even resist you.
26. This is the most important tip I can ever give you in regards to marriage; when it gets rough, go physical with long walks, swimming, biking, running, jumping jacks, tennis, sit-ups. Just keep moving ... away from the bedroom.
27. He loves you with all his heart, and we're still trying to figure out why?
28. You must be a unicorn, because your man is magical. That's the only way to nab a unicorn.
29. Your wedding night is suppose to be a tender magical time. Forget that. You're going to be so exhausted after the wedding that you'll be lucky to stay awake long enough to remember you're now a wife. Plus if you don't consummate the marriage it gives you one more night to annul it if you want!
30. Give it time, you'll want out.
31. Pretty soon you're getting another ring, yippee!
32. Get ready for the ride of your life, marriage is like a roller coaster, it's filled with ups, downs, dips, valleys, and sometimes you get a break and it's calm for second.
33. If you want everything to work between you and hubby and you want it bad enough, you still won't get it! Crap is gonna happen.
34. We are gathered here today to unite this Bride with her friends so she can have one last hurrah before she bites the big one.
35. Marriage is spring, the honeymoon is summer, staying together through trouble is fall, winter is the final test. If you mess up, rinse and repeat.
36. Crying about your problems won't fix them, marrying your problems is akin to setting your hair on fire! Are you sure about this?
37. As a gift I want to give you my love, best wishes, hope filled prayers and good thoughts. I'm tapped out so I'm going sentimental.
38. You're the kind of woman any man would want, unfortunately you already picked one!
39. Getting married is like baking a cake. Right now you're at the stage where you reach in the cupboard and get the bowl. It's gonna take a lifetime for that sucker to cook.
40. Family is everything, so don't forget us!
41. Train him from the start! Actually forget that. You're the one who needs training.
42. Take a honeymoon because life is gonna get so busy you'll be lucky if you have time to breath.
43. Getting married was an excellent idea. Hope you get a big haul.
44. Brides are bright, cheerful, spectacular, envied and incredible hosts. Then there's you.
45. We love you tons. You are our best friend and we're behind you all the way through this wedding. We'll be there for you even if you back out.
46. You're marrying our best friend. There's a movie about how I really feel about that.
47. Tweet out your hopes and dreams, 'cause Twitter needs some good news fast.
48. Missing your marriage would be like missing the event of the year because no one can believe you finally said yes!
49. Sometimes the road takes you home and other times the road takes you to his home. His is nicer, congrats!
50. Are you marrying for money or love? We have a bet going and I want to win the pool. Do me a solid, say money.
51. Your Bridal Shower is going to be the time of my life, mainly because that's the closets I'll get to marriage and the best part, gifts!
52. You two look so happy together! It has me worried. That's not natural.
53. Brides without the zilla are much nicer to be around
54. We hope you make each other laugh because you're both gonna need those skills to keep the fire going.
55. Stay in shape in case this one doesn't work out.
56. Sometimes it's the Groom who garners all the attention, never mind, that cracked me up too.
57. Marriage is when comedy and tragedy intersect.
58. Stay strong, it's downhill from here on in.
59. You're young, hot, and smart. After you're married the clock starts ticking on everything.
60. Take it from someone whose been married for decades; you're going to have to eat a lot of garbage to get through this.
© 2018 Barbara Tremblay Cipak