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Funny Things to Write in an Engagement Card

Updated on April 19, 2018
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Barbara has spent over forty years writing poems, lyrics, and sayings for cards, and interpreting the meanings and messages in song.

Funny Sayings You Can Write in Engagement Cards - Find one, Write it As is or Tweak it to Say What You Want it to Say
Funny Sayings You Can Write in Engagement Cards - Find one, Write it As is or Tweak it to Say What You Want it to Say

Funny Things to Write in an Engagement Card for the Bride to Be

  1. So, you've taken the plunge? I knew you'd flush.
  2. If your man is all that, then shouldn't you share him with us?
  3. What made you say yes? Um, don't answer that, we're all using our imagination.
  4. You've been together forever, and now you're finally making it legal, WTF.
  5. So do you have super powers or something? Did you hypnotize him?
  6. He put a ring on it, and you put a leash on it.
  7. He's so hot, you're so lucky, and we have to look and never touch. Not fair.
  8. Sometimes getting engaged means you have to give something up. It's your freedom stupid! Your freeeeeedummmb!
  9. We love him, you love him, your family loves him, so it's official, he's a blow-up doll. Has to be.
  10. Are you marrying your best friend, I think not, cause if you were, you would be hitching that ball and chain to me.
  11. Getting married means you're going to have to delete the word 'Single' from all forms and documents, 'cause you'll never get to say you're single again!
  12. When you get married, you become one with the other. Keep your own name so you at least something left that's yours!
  13. Your light shines bright because you're happy. Or it's because you're now in complete panic mode and are walking around with that 'I just got struck by lightening' look.
  14. In times of trouble, remember you're the one who said yes, so you'll have to kick your own *ss.
  15. Are you really sure you want to do this? Just double checking before you hitch your horse to his wagon.
  16. You're stepping into the unknown with nothing but the confidence that it will all work out. It's kind of like buying a lottery ticket isn't it?
  17. Just think of it, when you've been together for 50 years, you're engagement day will seem like it should be in the history books, until then, you're just another one who is about to bite the dust.
  18. Make memories that your grandchildren can know about.
  19. If you feel you're at risk of being a runaway bride, remember, you could end up with Richard Gere, so don't hesitate.
  20. This is the year you officially said yes to the end of your singleness; remember, it didn't have to end this way!
  21. Congratulations, you're marrying into a triple A family and you won't fit in! But you're the nut everyone needs and loves.
  22. Don't worry, you're going to be a beautiful bride and wife. Not that you were worried about that.
  23. When you walk down the aisle, blink twice if you need a rescue.
  24. Time heals all wounds, but getting married has no cure.
  25. You're an inspiration to most of us - well to those of us who are trying to get hitched and are having no luck whatsoever.
  26. What's your secret, how did you nab him? I want to use your technique to see if I can't get me one of those.
  27. Congratulations, he's incredible. How in the heck did you get him! We're all confused about that.
  28. When you start to have second thoughts, call me, I'll take one for the team.
  29. We heard you got engaged! Answer this one question for all of us, 'how naughty did you have to be to get that ring?'
  30. We know you're a good girl, and we know he's a good boy, so we've come to terms that your wedding may be the most boring in history, so we're suggesting a leather wedding dress for you, and white leather chaps for him, and the cracking sounds of whips when you both say 'I Do'. Whadyathink?
  31. When you lose your way, come to my house, we'll pretend you're single again
  32. Be strong, you're about to say 'I do' to another human being, and that alone can cause a panic attack!
  33. You're WHAT! Engaged?? Girl, didn't you hear anything I said??
  34. In a world of troubles, you've decided to contribute more?
  35. Ok, I'm seriously happy for you. No sarcasm. Nothing funny. Just pure happiness ... that it's you and not me!!
  36. On the bright side, he actually proposed.
  37. This is my third lifetime and he finally popped the question! Thank gawd, 'cause I'm never reincarnating again.
  38. It's no longer a cliff hanger, you're ending this movie!
  39. Love is the way you get through everything. Remember that when you can't stand looking at him.
  40. As his wife, be the opposite of what he expects; barely talk, it'll freak him out.

Funny sayings to write in an engagement card when you're celebrating a couple who appreciates a good sense of humor
Funny sayings to write in an engagement card when you're celebrating a couple who appreciates a good sense of humor

Funny Things to Write in an Engagement Card for the Groom to Be

  1. So you finally did it. You're tagged.
  2. You're so into each other, you should have Tattoos of rings on your fingers, instead of rings: Permanent rings.
  3. Don't cry, it could be worse, you could be getting divorced.
  4. Be happy, 'cause there's no other way to get through this.
  5. All the guys got together and bought you this sympathy card. Ok, it's really a jealousy card. Ok, it's honestly a be happy card. Ok, it's a WTF card.
  6. Congratulations on losing your mind, glad she found it and kept it!
  7. Funny, you don't look any different, wait, I see it now, yes, it's sheer panic.
  8. You're her number 1; yah, just go with that.
  9. Your conversations will be more fun now, you can pretend to hear her and she can pretend you're listening. That's what marriage is all about Charlie Brown.
  10. When the music stops, just dance like it's still playing. Fake it. That's the rule.
  11. When you're ready for a break, like right after the wedding, we can go camping.
  12. For your Bachelor Party we're planning to get you strippers, but your future wife already threatened our life, so it's now stripper puppies.
  13. Self imposed hell, that's what some say marriage is, but we're going with happiness til the end of time. It's the meds talking.
  14. Bachelor parties are only for the wild and crazy, so we're all going, but you don't have to.
  15. Now let's set the ground rules immediately, I'm never helping you move.
  16. You're daring to dream, just make sure it doesn't become a nightmare.
  17. Don't steal all the happiness. We know you're a happiness hog.
  18. She loves you and we're trying to figure out what she sees that we don't, but congratulations anyway.
  19. Can't believe you're getting married, time to drink.
  20. We all decided you're the luckiest guy alive. We don't understand it at all!
  21. Ouch, love hurts. Congrats on getting owned.
  22. You're still single so we're going to help you enjoy this ending of the chapter of your life without getting you arrested.
  23. Congrats on your engagement! She's too good for you.
  24. Next it will be babies, then grandchildren, then retirement, then death. Sorry, didn't mean to speed things up.
  25. For your bachelor party we're going to time travel back to before you were engaged. See you last Thursday.
  26. If you don't think about it too much, you won't panic.
  27. Keep your life simple, because complicated is way too exhausting. Congrats!
  28. You're going to be married soon - don't know why that makes me laugh!
  29. You look great for a soon to be married guy, actually you look terrified.
  30. Marriage is easy, SAID NO ONE!
  31. Don't spend too much money before you get married, cause you're gonna need every penny after!
  32. Before you get married, get a jock strap
  33. Marriage is the only road that never ends
  34. Congratulations, you're foot got snagged in the trap, we tried to warn you! Didn't you hear us screaming 'HEADS UP!!!'
  35. You're entering the married club; it's a special place that only the brightest and best get to go into. Just kidding. Drink, it will help.

Just Married, Finally Hitched

Write something funny in an engagement card for the happy couple, like: "My only tip, keep the Garter off your head"
Write something funny in an engagement card for the happy couple, like: "My only tip, keep the Garter off your head"

© 2018 Barbara Tremblay Cipak

Do your write personal notes or sayings in cards to friends or family?

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    • profile image


      9 months ago

      yes i do..its actual fun writing.

    • Brite-Ideas profile imageAUTHOR

      Barbara Tremblay Cipak 

      16 months ago from Toronto, Canada

      Dianna lol thank you

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 

      16 months ago

      You had me laughing on a few of these. These could help relieve the seriousness of the situation!

    • Ladymermaid profile image

      Lorelei Cohen 

      17 months ago from Canada

      Wow, quite the list of engagement sayings. These would work so well as things to say during the proposal too.

    • Brite-Ideas profile imageAUTHOR

      Barbara Tremblay Cipak 

      17 months ago from Toronto, Canada

      It's kind of quirky knack I have, they just fall off the tongue when I go to write them. I discovered my brother has the sense of humor with voice, and I may have it more with a pen lol

    • aesta1 profile image

      Mary Norton 

      17 months ago from Ontario, Canada

      Some of these are really funny and will make the couple laugh. Sometimes, I write sayings in cards but not as much as I used to.

    • Wednesday-Elf profile image


      17 months ago from Savannah, Georgia

      Funny group of sayings for engagement cards, Barbara. Love your list. :)


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