New Years Resolutions For Couples
Start over New, for New Years 2011
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Give Yourself a Better Chance and Work the Resolutions as a Couple
Every year we make them and usually break them by months end. I speaking of New Years Resolutions. Specially when in a relationship, New Years resolutions affect more than just the person making the resolution. If you vow to stop eat ice cream-but your partner does not and keeps the freezer fully stocked, you are virtually being set up to fail, even before you began. Making resolutions as a couple can make those goals a little easier to obtain. If you are searching on ways to improve yourself as well as relationship consider making New Years, a joint effort when it comes to resolutions.
Resolution- Quit Smoking…
Every year thousands try and many fail. If both you and your spouse want to quit- do it together. Try fun alternatives that can add to your life experiences or gain you something (other than your lung capacity), rather than despising one another for the next six months.
- Try a hypnotist, reports show that they actually work if you believe that they can. If that is not an option, make it a game of cost and gain.
- Get 2 jars (which must be of equal size, one for them, one for you. Each smoke you have cost you a dollar (a $1 bill-not change) which is put in your spouses jar.
- You can win 1 or 2 ways. 1st way…you quit first, you take both jars… and do whatever you wish with it, as long as it has something to do with you not with your spouse.
- 2nd way to win, the jar with your spouse’s money in it is topped off, unable to fit anything else into it. His jar-you spend, your jar, divide the money up half stays in your jar and half goes to his (you didn’t win-you are just in the lead, so you cant spend it all), and still continue the $1 per smoke for each cigarette each of you smoke
- Doing this $1 per smoke deal, will eventually result in hopefully 1 of the 2 people if not both quitting, even if you end up quitting because your spouse spent all your cigarette money.
Resolution- More Sex…
If you and your spouse can’t seem to find time for intimacy and you both want to, you have to attempt to plan for it (the best you can). If you have sex once a month and want it once a week, as unromantic as it may seem to plan a night for it, planning will give you more romance than not planning it. Planning ahead can be something like picking a day of each week of the month where the two of you can plan to be together.
- 1st week, perhaps you both take off of work about an hour or two early and meet at home for some needed TLC.
- If you have children, ask a friend or family member to watch the kids one night for a few hours (you don’t have to say what for). Even if you can’t find someone to watch over them at night, try in the afternoon. Making love doesn’t need to happen at night to mean something
- If your schedules are opposite from one another, get a hotel room and meet for an extra special lunch hour.
- What is usually family night, or a night that friends come by to hang out-cancel and hang out together? The key is making the smallest adjustments and sacrifices can not only add to the intimacy and amount of sex you have it will ultimately add to the romance and communication the two of you have. Planning something such as sex into a busy schedule-takes team work and communication. Eventually you won’t have to put so much planning and focus into fitting sex into your life; it will be a more regular event.
Resolution-Make it or Break it...
When you come to New Years Eve, and the past year of your love relationship has been comparable to a World War, you need to make some serious adjustments and decisions.
- Sit down and get it out on the table. Get the issues, feeling and everything related to problems out in the open so you both can discuss them.
- If needed, go see a mediator (counselor), to keep things focused on what is actually the underlined issues you need to be focusing on.
- After it is all out, and you have a game plan to improve you relationship, vow to forgive and move on. If you can not move on, it is time to let it go.
- Forgiveness is a key in a relationship. If you set boundaries that are constantly ignored and crossed, and you can not deal with it, stop torturing yourself by staying.
- Don’t be mean; be civil, honest and understanding. You are an adult, this is life. Act as though you are an adult, attempting to keep the love of your life in your arms.
- Make an effort to make it work, just as you did when you began dating. Use your manners; make plans which you keep with one another, blow off your friends for your spouse. Bring flowers, make those surprise phone calls in the middle of the day, just to say hello or I am thinking about you. Do the things that you did to initially win their affection.
- Talk-Talk-Talk….NOT fight. No one ever wins a fight, all that happens is someone gives up. Don’t continue to put your spouse in a position of giving up-they may end up giving up on you.
Resolution- Shed some Pounds
The very popular New Years Resolution of “I want to lose weight”. It is virtually impossible to lose weight and eat right when you are surrounded by all the sweets and treats that your spouse enjoys. If you decide to make weight loss your New Years Resolution, Make it a joint effort.
- Clean out the kitchen together. Go through frig and cabinets and donate/give away or trash all the junk that adds to your waistline.
- Before you go grocery shopping, make a list together. Do not attempt to buy groceries on an empty stomach, temptation will kick in and you may end up reverting back to the unhealthy snacks you need to do without.
- Not only should you change the foods you are eating, but change what you drink. Soda, even of the diet variety, is not a healthy beverage. The more H2O the better, if you need some extra flavor, try a Vitamin Water.
- Plan your week’s meals together. If you know what you are going to eat, before you are standing in front of the open refrigerator door, you will have better luck avoiding Pizza Hut. If you can make a few meals for the week on the weekend, you don’t have to worry about cooking or deciding what to eat, everything is already prepared.
- Take your lunches to work. Make them together, if you usually have to eat in a rush, taking your own lunch and snacks will help keep, McDonalds in the distance.
- Work out a schedule to work out together. Even if it is a quick walk or jog around the block, get up and do it together.
Resolution-Get a Better Job/Get a Job
This is a resolution, although it is you against the job market, you still need your spouses help. By help I mean, support.
- Make sure your spouse realizes that looking for a job is a job all in its own. Have them ask around, put your name and your specialty out there. Personal References go further than some random resume sitting among a hundred just like it.
- If you are a stay at home mom and are looking for a job, ask your spouse to explain to their employer that you are searching. Perhaps see if there is a day during the week that your spouse’s employer could let them have an extended lunch, come in late or leave early, so you can try to schedule interviews on that day.
- Finding a job when you are a couple takes coordinating with one another, just as everything in life does. If your spouse does not want you to work the night shift, try to avoid applying for those positions, there is no need to start a conflict over a position you are just starting.
New Years resolutions are made and broken each and every year by millions of people. Working with your spouse can help ensure that you are able to accomplish whatever it is that you wish to accomplish this year. Good luck and Happy Holidays!