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Taking Back Valentines Day

Updated on February 14, 2013

This morning I woke up to great cuddling. After making a concerted effort to just have a great morning, the wife, Jamilyn, says, "Happy Valentines Day!"

Yep. I forgot it was Valentines Day. I don't really dig on Holidays the way most people do. I feel like we have commercialized them so badly, the point is overshadowed. And V-Day is about candy and "love toys".

Then I see the post by my friend, Ashley, this morning. She commented on how we also make v-day about success in relationships, or being a failure at love. She goes on to say that when we talk about love it shouldn't be about one person. Love is not an exclusive thing. Everyone special to us should be in our hearts, as they truly are on other days.

Thank you, Ashley for the reminder.

A holiday is what we make it. It's personal. It's not lived by everyone in the world within the scope of your life. It's your life. And you are the one living it.

So, I say to you, who are frustrated, alone, or sad on a day like this:
Join me! I am taking this holiday back. Screw the social idioms. I will love and express love as I see fit. Without silly social dogma. Without requirement to buy stuff. Without the requirement to be with someone else on a certain day. I love me. Loving me is all I need to be successful in love. Truly loving oneself is all the love one needs. This will bring happiness. Not identifying oneself by the love someone else brings you. The romance follows. And THAT romance is truly loving.

And for that missing love, sometimes it's just on the horizon. Wait for it. It will come when you love yourself. "I just haven't met you yet."

© 2013 Cole Ikerd


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    • coleikerd profile imageAUTHOR

      Cole Ikerd 

      5 years ago

      Thank you.

    • sen.sush23 profile image


      5 years ago from Kolkata, India

      Cole, I totally agree with you. I somehow feel cheated watching my little personal expressions of love being stolen away and commercially adorned and turned into sloppy and splotchy symbols- teddy bears, and red hearts and chocolates and flowers. Oh! Now I am even afraid to call up my boyfriend on V-day and say, 'How I love you!' .. But here, I am commenting and voting up your hub on the conciseness of the sentiments you have expressed. That makes your point all the more clear. Well done!

    • coleikerd profile imageAUTHOR

      Cole Ikerd 

      5 years ago

      And a Happy Valentines Day to you!

      I see nothing wrong with enjoying the lame things. It's great to express our love, and sometimes the things that become commercialized fluff really are the right sentiment.

      The problem, in my mind, is that we get so hung up on it that we forget what it's truly about. Even something as simple as a hug can mean the world, and buying someone a Ferrari can be meaningless.

      I may put in an edit later. My wife spent all day putting together a fruit chocolate, balloon, party for me and the kids. Her time and effort makes it all that much more personal. It made for a great surprise.

    • aslaught profile image


      5 years ago from Alabama

      I completely agree on how commerialized all holidays have become. I see that marketing has played on our herd mentality and we feel compelled to go out and buy useless stuff to prove our love to folks in our lives. We should celebrate our love for each other every day, and not with silly boxes of chocolates and lame cards. Yet, when my hubby gave me the tradional things, I was happy and felt compelled to go and buy him some of the same lame things.

    • peachpurple profile image


      5 years ago from Home Sweet Home

      Wish I could take back my Valentine's Day which I had 21 years ago... Happy Valentine's Day!!!


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