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The Evil Side of Christmas (Like You Didn't Know)

Updated on December 15, 2011

Time for Desperate Measures

The Christmas holiday is perceived as a "goody, goody" holiday but there is an EVIL SIDE that most people know about but don't care to admit.

It is not about volunteering and feeding the hungry cause you're a starving college student or a broke single person or a teen who has no idea what to do with his or her life. In fact, life is so bad that you can conceivably see yourself in that same line of hungry needy people.

The holidays is a time for desperate measures and this brings out the evil side of Christmas, like you didn't know!

Starving College Students

If you're a College student, the idea that this holiday is for "giving" is really a mistake. You're a starving student so Christmas is TAKING whatever you can get! Heck, you'll take 2 boxes of Top Ramen as a gift if you have to! Whatever gift you can get, you take . . . except those loud Christmas logo-type sweaters but you may need them cause its going to be a cold winter.

If the relatives give you money, save it cause you may need it to make next month's rent.

Everyone knows you're a College student so you got a perfect excuse not to give anything, which is your intention anyway.

Broke and Single Adults

If you're under 30 and single, the thought of giving anything should be terrifying. This is the time to dump your boyfriend or girlfriend cause you can't afford them during this time. Don't worry, the new year is coming around and you'll meet someone new.

Like a College Student, no one is expecting anything from you cause you're broke and single, so you got the "perfect cover." So take everything and take every offer from any rich relative.

If Grandpa asks if you need "ANYTHING," you give him the amount. Don't be shy. He won't live any longer, so do him the favor and have him either give you that generous check or buy you a new car. Yep, he'll be happy for giving you something and you'll be estatic that you got something that didn't cost you a thing (except maybe your self-respect).

Clueless Teens

Let's face it. You don't get the adulation that once had when you were 10, so "suck it up" and start kissing some serious butt to get what you want!

Getting money is always a good thing from your older relatives, who have cash to burn! Smile a lot and thank the relatives who gave that generous gift. You can cuss the ones who gave that useless gift behind closed doors.

What Christmas Really Means

Returning your bad gifts is what Christmas is all about and exchanging it for something you really want! Heck, if money is really needed, then selling the stuff on Ebay is even better. Sorry, but that sweater with the Giant Santa may not get you much.

The holiday is a "dog eat dog" exercise and if you have to manipulate your way to get the gift you really want, do it! For those in a relationship during the holidays, it would be sweet if you can dump your expensive girlfriend or boyfriend but make sure you get the gift FIRST!

So this Christmas "hit up" your parents, grandparents, friends, girlfriend or boyfriend and their family, extended relatives, and the next door neighbors for gifts. No one is excluded on this list! You deserve better during the holidays cause you're just living the Evil Side of Christmas!

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    • Paul Bisquera profile image
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      Paul Bisquera 6 years ago from Los Angeles

      Thanks Kate. You're right about the good stuff on Hubpages. There are a lot of good writers here and I learn from them as well. You could say that the ones I've read on Hub are like my mentors along with the likes of authors Michael Connelly, Agatha Christie, John Grisham, Nicolas Sparks, Edgar Allan Poe, and Robin Cook. It's always good to learn from the best.

    • Kate Mc Bride profile image

      Kate McBride 6 years ago from Donegal Ireland

      this is a class hub Paul.It is great fun and so well put together.Only problem is I am getting distracted from writing cos there is so much good stuff to read here :-)

      Will pass it on via facebook as per your other hub

    • Paul Bisquera profile image
      Author

      Paul Bisquera 6 years ago from Los Angeles

      Thanks cclitgirl! My teenagers couldn't believe I wrote this. . . but I did, I did! Ha, ha, ha

    • cclitgirl profile image

      Cynthia Calhoun 6 years ago from Western NC

      This is a funny hub. :) We all know there's that *evil* side...hehehe.

    • Paul Bisquera profile image
      Author

      Paul Bisquera 6 years ago from Los Angeles

      Thanks for the compliment, Chaplin. Sorry about being dumped though. This was meant to be funny, not to be taken seriously, of course. I got the idea from my Niece who is a College student when she said that she had to take whatever gift she got for Xmas, at any COST! I took her comment and "ran with it" so to speak.

    • ChaplinSpeaks profile image

      Sarah Johnson 6 years ago from Charleston, South Carolina

      I thought this was funny. Hmmm...maybe this is why I was always dumped right before the holidays!

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