Valentine's Day; Survival Guide for Women - Spread Love, Not Stress
Love is in the air...
In a time when the world is filled with violence, anger, hate and fear, Valentine’s Day is much needed and we should all take time to exaggerate its importance this year. Let’s just spread the love around and over-indulge on any love that comes our way.
Where'd Valentine's Day Come From?
The history of Valentine’s Day has never been clear to me; does it originate from the Christian realm, Ancient Roman’s or is it just a Pagan Celebration? Depending on where you seek information, chances are you will find a variety of answers. I say; “What difference does it really make?”
Tips for the Ladies...
Valentine’s Day is at the least an excuse to give a little more love and hopefully receive some too. But, buyers beware; and ladies, I’m talking to you. Yes, we get all caught up in the moment, the hope of some romance, attention and a little extra affection. Unfortunately, when that special someone in our life doesn’t live out the fantasy that we were hoping for, we end up disappointed and not only do we feel worse than we would’ve on an ordinary day, but chances are we’re going to frustrate that someone special. So tip one; don’t give clues and hints that Valentine’s Day is coming or what we may want. (At least if you do, don’t make them obvious. When we put all kinds of attention into trying to create an ideal situation and our partner doesn’t catch on, we tend to get mad at him and disappointed besides. Remember; it’s not his fault. Men aren’t wired like us. We want to be treated special on our birthdays, on mother’s day, anniversaries, or any other date we can try to connect some importance to. These are just days on the calendar to men and while they might be madly in love doesn’t mean they’re going to rearrange their schedule to show us how special they think we are. Tip two; Let it go, the smaller our expectations, the smaller the disappointment and we increase the likelihood that we may be pleasantly surprised. Tip three; do NOT expect to receive what you give. We are great at getting all cheesy and making homemade Valentine’s Cards for our lovers; doilies and cutting and pasting. We will prep a little more and put on some red clothes, maybe buy something sexy. We’ll turn down the lights and make a special meal. We’ll bat our eyelashes and expect our men to whisk us away like something out of a romance novel. Chances are, it is not gonna happen. If we choose to put that much time and energy into acknowledging our loved one, that is our choice and it should be because we want to give, not because of what we want in return. Therefore, we cannot allow ourselves to be hurt when we do not receive what we have given. Tip four; whatever he does is good enough and we need to make him think it’s great. Trust me. Men can be a little like kids; they do better with positive reinforcements. If we whine and cry and complain because they didn’t do enough or make a big deal, it isn’t going to teach them a lesson or show them the err of their ways. However, if we make a big huge deal that he picked up a card at the gas station on the way home, he will feel proud of himself and perhaps try to top himself next time around.
Killing the Mood...
It Can Be a Special Day...So Let it
Valentine’s Day is a bonus, it’s an extra. It can either be the same day as any other or it can be better. There is no point in making it a worse day or a sadder day because we have set ourselves up to fail. Don’t exhaust yourself in an attempt to create a day that you are spoiled. If you have that much energy than exhaust yourself in an attempt to be the one doing the spoiling. Don’t expect the unexpected; you get what you get and don’t throw a fit, in fact, appreciate it. Just enjoy the day, let it be a good day for both people involved. Let me know how you make out.