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Why Spend a Holiday Alone?

Updated on February 1, 2018
RTalloni profile image

Robertatalloni means creativity. Whether in writing or in more typical art forms, artistry (and a bit of fun) must be part of the work.

Just Live!
Just Live! | Source

Avoiding Holiday Hassles

Holiday hype highlights the word lonely for a lot of people. For the shy that's not such a bad thing, and there are others who are actually happy for the alone time. But if dread is the first thought that comes to mind, think again and plan ahead!

Not Your Grandma’s Take-Out

Eating by ourselves has its benefits, but going to a restaurant on Valentine’s Day is not ordinarily going to be the first choice of someone spending it alone. Sure, planning ahead and making a special meal at home is a good idea with its own benefits, but think outside the box for a gift to self.

Ordering typical take-out is not recommended, but a restaurant meal is. Make ordering a dinner from the best restaurant in town the priority. Plan ahead and spruce up the house or apartment for the day. Make sure candles are on hand and there is music (and maybe a movie) waiting in the wings.

Theme the evening around a trip planned for the future, refreshing a goal for the New Year, or a personal project you want to finish. Spend time focusing on the how, when, and wherewithal of it all.

Don’t wait until the last minute to order or disappointment might be the bill of fare. Consider all the available options--unless you live in NYC or LA. We have to be reasonable! Just think of what sounds like the best meal possible and have a one-time soiree with it.

No need to just make it through any holiday!
No need to just make it through any holiday! | Source

Give to Others

Attention: do not say duh. We’re going somewhere with this. It’s a tried and true method for changing up what some say is a bunch of foolishness. It may also be stepping out of one’s proverbial comfort zone, but everyone knows that taking a gallant step means amazing things can happen.

Be creative in finding out where people are needed. Neonate intensive care units have programs that allow volunteers to cuddle babies so their comfort and well-being are increased. How breathtaking would that be?! And always there are the much more common opportunities present in nursing homes and homeless centers.

These activities require a bit of research and planning, but doing it can give a whole new meaning to Valentine’s Day. Once a person has some experience volunteering they are then qualified to share information and encourage others to do the same. That makes this a gift that truly keeps on giving!

Give Yourself a Gift

Another rather obvious item on the list unless one goes at it in an uncommon manner, but an unexpected gift is difficult to give oneself without some consideration.

A thing is not the particular goal. Think about how extraordinary it would be for a home body to decide to go to a theme park. An exciting experience may be the best choice, but it should be personal, not something decided on just because it is a popular trend.

Maybe learning to draw is a long-wished-for but at-the-bottom-of-the-totem-pole desire. Dare to do it. Sign up for that class before Valentine’s Day, then spend time that day buying supplies, deciding where to begin–portraiture, landscapes, kids toys, greeting card designs...

Spend the big day/evening enjoying some relaxing practice sessions. Let that initial exercise be the beginning of new drawing habits and see where they lead. Laugh, have fun, turn negative feelings into excitement about the lessons.

No matter how this concept is applied, dig in the heels and part ways with everything else for the day. Don’t let previous hindrances block the joy!

Give Yourself a Valentine

Before the big day plan a quiet evening at home. A glorious meal isn’t the focus here. Freshening up the body and mind from the day would be the first priority.

Then, be prepared to settle down with a new, clean notebook, a newly sharpened pencil, a nice writing pen, and maybe some colored pencils. Have some melodic music ready to play in the background. Shut out the rest of the world for this evening.

Begin writing yourself a letter, starting with some history. Include something of where you are and design it to end with where you want to go. Take time to create hand drawn graphs, charts, or lists that help you see things from different perspectives, and be sure to include some drawings just for fun. Don’t worry about a lack of skills, just enjoy the experience.

This project is for a person to create, to hold on to, to continue working on, and to eventually change if they so choose. If done with one’s heart it may, for reasons that can’t be seen now, turn out to be a valuable annual activity.

You CAN enjoy holidays!
You CAN enjoy holidays! | Source

Make Yourself Laugh

Break up the humdrum of the day by doing something unpredictable to reap the benefits of laughter. First, arrange for flowers to be sent to your lovely self. Write a note that amounts to a corny joke from a secret admirer to be included. Send them to your workplace so you’ll have to carry them out of the building at day’s end.

Smile a lot all day long. Say nothing. If questions are asked, roll your eyes. Be sure to leave the note’s envelope open on your desk when you take a break or go to lunch. The most cowardly nosey person will not be able to withstand the temptation. And be ready with some more corny Valentine’s Day jokes for the persistent enquirer.

Here are a couple of jokes to get you started. What are love birds called? Tweethearts. What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? I’m sweet on you. Now get busy looking up more. Be ready to laugh at your own corny jokes and make others laugh with you! Sure, there will be the naysayers, but who cares? Enjoy those who have fun with you!

Find Summer Somewhere, Somehow

Say it slow--s-u-m-m-e-r-t-i-m-e. There’s no better antidote to winter holidays than chillin’ on the beach, but if you can’t buy a ticket to go down by the seaside, find a salty place in your town.

Celebrate with a warm swim in an indoor pool filled with saline water. YWCAs that are switching from chlorine to salt water for their pools could be a fine choice, and New York’s Skyline Hotel is a great example of an indoor salt water pool that is reasonably priced for a splurge.

Some gyms and spas have heated saltwater lap pools and may offer a one-time trial membership. It could be that a better than best idea is to slide over to a place that sells the units. Just slip and slide a bit of summer right on home to stay. Saltwater systems are easy enough to locate these days.

Hmmm...I may have to drive to the coast after I finish this hub!

Do Yourself a Capital Favor

Plan ahead to rethink finances on this holiday. B-O-R-I-N-G? Nope, you’re wrong. And if it’s done right you’ll have done yourself a great favor. Doesn’t everyone need to periodically take stock of where their dollars are at, what their long and short term goals are, and how they can make needed changes?

Have a nice but quick meal at home so you can S-T-O-P and T-H-I-N-K. Take time to do some research on what can be done immediately to stop outflow and build a bigger reserve. Inquire about getting information from an organization like Financial Peace University or 48 Days. Learn some techniques of people who live like the wealthy.

The warning about the love of money is still good advice, but sensibly working hard doing what some will not so that later we can do what will be impossible for those who didn’t really is a smart strategy. Love yourself enough to do it!

Are People Waiting to Hear from You?

So, alone it is and nothing that comes to mind appeals. Perhaps the best thing to do is think of people we’ve been needing to contact for a long time. Writing that relative, friend, or business acquaintance that became not quite a friend but was more than business to us could do us much good.

Preplanning will provide the best outcome for this diversion. Deciding who needs to hear from us will guide in buying the special card(s) or stationery. It might be fun to hand make these or generate them electronically ahead of time. Don’t forget the stamps.

Then, settle in to write the love notes on Valentine’s Day, forgetting self and loving others:

Dear MiMi, Aunt Megela, Rodger, Lupa...

It’s been so long, but I want you to know I love you more than...

Memories of our summer in Twillingate come to mind when I see...

You may not know/remember/realize it but...

The love and care you gave me when I was...

Your kind and generous spirit toward everyone has inspired me to...

I’ve never forgotten how you...

With much fond love,

Your affectionate,

With warm appreciation,

Finish it/them for mailing the next day, then wait for the lovely responses that will surely come. Handwritten letters have a long history of impressing people and they continue to hold their value.

Have you ever spent a holiday alone by choice?

See results

Yes! Celebrate Being Alone!

Celebrate being alone? Why certainly. A person does not have to be an introvert to do it, either. The dimensional reasons to be glad about being alone range from humorous to sad.

Someone hurting from a loss of any sort likely welcomes a day or evening alone to rest and not worry about being interrupted when family or friends are bustling around with a celebration. Unless they have been there, done that, it might be hard for others to understand, but enjoying the alone time rather than having to cheer up for their sake could be something to truly celebrate.

Appreciating spending Valentine’s Day alone and just being glad for not being inseparably attached to someone who is hard work could be a great choice. Too many people cannot be satisfied, do not enjoy the simple things life has to offer, or are so wrapped up in material things they cannot connect with anyone on important levels.

Celebrating alone-ness on holidays is not something that happens every year. But, oh yes, enjoying doing nothing or making it a respect-for-me day is a strategy for raising life’s bar a notch or two.

Dispense with the Silliness

Skip it. Yep, just skip it. Ideas will come once this one is thought out. Read a good book or watch an old movie that used to be a favorite (anything but a romance). It may seem unimaginative at first, but it’s very satisfying.

Take the time to plan a small unValentine’s party with friends. Um, wait...isn’t this about being alone? Yes it is, so the unValentine’s party would focus on anything but being with someone (as in a romantic relationship).

The event’s rule would be that nothing nor no one can wear, bring, speak, sing, eat, drink, or even smell anything about Valentine’s Day no way, no how. To accomplish this set a theme that everyone can participate in together.

An old-fashioned board game night with childhood kids’ games and fun appetizers for the evening might be just the ticket. If it’s girls or guys only, think about a cooking themed evening that everyone can participate in with a plan for conversation around a few unusual topics, or a book.

Don’t forget the corny jokes.

Turn holidays into something to really celebrate!
Turn holidays into something to really celebrate! | Source


Many people find them difficult. Some would say tedious, some might describe pain at the very thought of them. Whatever the case, taking the concept of not celebrating them traditionally but applying an idea like one of the above could be very useful. No matter what a person decides to do, there’s no excuse for not doing something they can enjoy and benefit from in the process.

A Note on Volunteering Your Time

People who are involved in volunteer work need encouragement to stick with it. The book A Servant's Heart might be just the gift you can offer someone who has faithfully been working to help others. Its service focused devotional thoughts could also be used to encourage those who are thinking of volunteering to go ahead and make a positive decision.

Add your ideas for non-traditional holiday celebrations:

Submit a Comment
  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    6 weeks ago from the short journey

    Linda Chechar:

    Hmmm...alone together...not a bad idea at all, especially since you see relatives and friends often. It sound great, not odd! So glad you shared this lovely option here as it may help others in similar situations.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    6 weeks ago from the short journey

    Tamara Wilhite:

    Definitely a great option you shared! Thanks very much for adding this idea to the discussion.

  • lindacee profile image

    Linda Chechar 

    6 weeks ago from Arizona

    My husband and I don't spend each specific holiday with friends or relatives. That's been our tradition for years. The two of us go out to dinner and spend the rest of the day together. We have plenty of time to see our friends and relatives any time. We like to keep these special days to ourselves. I know that probably sounds odd but that's how we are.

  • tamarawilhite profile image

    Tamara Wilhite 

    2 months ago from Fort Worth, Texas

    There are many religious groups that hold holiday meals for members - if you're a member, attend their holiday meal. If you aren't a member, ask friends and neighbors to invite you to such gatherings.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    8 months ago from the short journey


    Thank you for your generous and insightful response. You have added to this post in a lovely way. So glad you were able to celebrate your dad's life. Thank you for sharing about it here!

  • smcopywrite profile image


    8 months ago from all over the web

    I love this article and all of the positive ways to spend a holiday. I sometimes believe people are selfish enough to never imagine there are those out there without the means to spend those special times with the same luster. These are the things memories are built on.

    It is very important for individuals struggling with loss or depression around times like these to make an effort to save good times\memories spent with a lost loved one. In other words, do not imagine this is the first father's day without dad. Think of it as the first one where we remember the great ones we had with him. talk out loud about those days spent together if these were fond memories. Celebrate his life and not his death.

    My personal last one was primarily dedicated to my brothers, husband and brother in law. Afterwards there was a special event for dad. My brothers and sisters along with in-laws (and our kids) all got together and lit a lantern for dad and let it go that evening in the sky. It brought us together and left a good memory of grandpa for father's day.

    A holiday is what you make it to be. Even when you want it to be. Time moves so fast. Make the most of what there is of it.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    9 months ago from the short journey

    Thank you kindly, and good for you. Now, don't wait for a special occasion to do it again! :)

  • LiteraryMind profile image

    Ellen Gregory 

    9 months ago from Connecticut, USA

    Very unique ideas. I have already purchased flowers for myself on Valentine's and Mother's Day.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    14 months ago from the short journey

    What a great memory to have of that special Thanksgiving! I agree that volunteering is most appealing. There are times, though, when closing down for the holiday in order to regroup and recoup is a really necessary thing to do.

  • Peggy W profile image

    Peggy Woods 

    14 months ago from Houston, Texas

    I like the idea of volunteering most of all. It takes away ideas of being alone and turns them into doing something positive for others. There is a great reward in that! The giver gets as much (or even more) back as the receiver. Also friendships can be made of other volunteers if done on a regular basis.

    One Thanksgiving my mother, husband and I went down to the George R. Brown convention center in Houston where food and clothing were given out to those who needed it. Guess who showed up and dished out food for several hours of their time. George H.W. Bush and Barbara! No fanfare or cameras accompanied them. Just plenty of smiles from everyone who saw them.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    23 months ago from the short journey

    Glenis Rix:

    Thanks much for adding your suggestion. Yes, these ideas are good options for singles (and not just for Valentine's Day) but some, at least, are also for those who feel alone within the crowd they are bound to since there can be many reasons for finding oneself in such a position.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    23 months ago from the short journey


    Thanks for stopping in to check out these ways to spend holidays outside the box.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    23 months ago from the short journey

    Linda Robinson60:

    Hope you are enjoying this start to a new year of holidays! :)

  • Glenis Rix profile image


    2 years ago from UK

    Good advice for singletons. Valentine's Day is a difficult time. Love the thought of salt water swimming pools. I've taken several vacations with tour companies that specialise in holidays for single people and can recommend them as a companiable way of travelling.

  • DDE profile image

    Devika Primić 

    2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

    Great ideas! I don't like to spend any day alone unless by choice.

  • Linda Robinson60 profile image

    Linda Robinson 

    2 years ago from Cicero, New York

    Ralph you are so right, I totally agree with you. :) Enjoy your day.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    2 years ago from the short journey


    Thanks kindly for reading and adding your comment. Those two favorites are real help most of the time! Wrapping them around a specific activity can help get people "there" so they can enjoy the benefits.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    2 years ago from the short journey

    Linda Robinson60:

    How nice of you to come by and leave your generous comment. Sometimes a different idea for a holiday is exactly what will make the difference in being lonely or being fulfilled.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    2 years ago from the short journey


    Thanks very much for checking out these ideas. Life can be difficult, but changing our perspective on holidays is sometimes tremendously helpful. Choosing meaningful is possible!

  • MsDora profile image

    Dora Weithers 

    2 years ago from The Caribbean

    Good thoughts for the lonely to ponder. Getting outside the house, and having some good laughs are my two favorites among what you mentioned. Thank you.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    2 years ago from the short journey

    Kaili Bisson:

    Thanks much for coming by. Though you do not need them, the ideas might help someone you know.

  • RTalloni profile imageAUTHOR


    2 years ago from the short journey


    Thanks kindly! So appreciate that you came by and added your comment. That you are able to enjoy holidays because you've learned what works for you is something to relish.

  • Linda Robinson60 profile image

    Linda Robinson 

    2 years ago from Cicero, New York

    Good morning. What an exceptional hub. Very interesting, packed with so much insight and great ideas. Absolutely loved it. Very uplifting and your thoughts and views on celebrations was outstanding. The perfect hub to make anyone feel special. Anxious and looking forward to reading many more of yours. Enjoy your day. And talk to you again. Linda

  • AliciaC profile image

    Linda Crampton 

    2 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

    I love this different approach to celebrating Valentine's Day. You've shared some great ideas for celebrating the holiday alone and in a meaningful but nontraditional way.

  • Kaili Bisson profile image

    Kaili Bisson 

    2 years ago from Canada

    Hello RT,

    This is full of great suggestions. I'm very good at self-amusing, but I understand that not everyone is like that.

  • purl3agony profile image

    Donna Herron 

    2 years ago from USA

    Another great hub! Holidays with my family can be a little stressful. I've realized that my mother is a nervous hostess, always worrying that things are prefect. And her nervousness stresses everyone else. So when I went away to college, I was thrilled to spend Thanksgiving with just a few friends, just eating potluck and watching movies. I now love spending some of the holidays either alone or with a few friends. It's a great way to relax and enjoy yourself. Thanks for posting!


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