International Fairy Day
June 24th is Fairy Day!
"[W]hen the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies. And now when every new baby is born its first laugh becomes a fairy. So there ought to be one fairy for every boy or girl. " ~James Matthew Barrie, Peter Pan
Alright, James Matthew Barrie. But maybe not every boy and girl WANT a fairy.
Lets take a look at some of the all time worst fairy god mothers.
In honor of fairy day
Here are ten fairies I wouldn't want as my fairy god mother.
The fairy godmother in Shreck - The reason: Totally evil.
This fairy godmother is all about scheming and blackmailing. I wouldn’t
be in her top priorities. She's all about what’s best for son and herself.
Memorable quote: “Let’s see... P-p-p-p-p, Princess. Cinderella... Handsome prince, lived happily ever after... oh, no ogres! Sleeping Beauty... handsome prince, no ogres. Thumbelina, no! Handsel and Gretel, no! The Golden Bird, the Little Mermaid, Pretty Woman... no, no, no, no, NO! You see, ogres don't live happily ever after. "
The "Rock" tooth fairy - The reason: creepiness.
Imagine this: your first tooth just fell out. You are filled with excitement and you can’t stop smiling. When night comes you carefully place the little tooth under your pillow. At first you are too jumpy to fall asleep but inevitably your eyes close. In the middle of the night you hear footsteps. You rub your eyes tiredly and open them slowly.
Standing over your bed with your tooth in his hand is the "rock".
And then comes your scream...
The Fairly Odd Parents (Cosmo and Wanda) - The reason: They are distracted and bring trouble.
Cosmo and Wanda are little Timmy's fairy godparents. However they always seem to get him into more trouble.
The Green Fairy--Absinthe - The reason: Not a good influence.
Glinda - The reason: Watch this.
I just finished reading my little brother the abridged version of the Wizard of OZ. When he discovered that Dorothy could have gone home all along, his reaction was disbelief. I tried to tell him that if she had gone home, she wouldn't have had the adventure--but he wasn’t convinced.
Maleficent in 'Sleeping Beauty - The reason: For obvious reasons.
This woman takes social rejection (not invited to a party) a little too far...
Cinderellas fairy god mother - The reason: Really? Why now?
She shows up after Cinderella is orphaned and enslaved by her evil step mother and stepsisters.
What took her so long?
Barbie fairy - The reason: No offense Barbs but I don't think you'd be up for the job.
I would be the laughingstock of my community if I had a barbie fairy godmother. Geez.
The Cottingham Fairies - The reason: They were faked.
The Cottingham fairies were a big scandal. Five photographs taken by Elsie Wright and Frances Griffiths, (two young cousins who lived in Cottingley, in England) showed the two girls playing with fairies in their back yard. The photographs came to the attention of writer Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. He endorsed the pictures being genuine and proof of the existence of the supernatural world. It was only many years later when the girls grew up that they admitted the pictures had been faked.
the cottingham fairiesClick thumbnail to view full-size
Flora, Fauna and Merryweather (from the sleeping beauty) - The reason: A terrible solution to an evil curse. Plus they get points for being creepy.
The evil fairy Maleficent curses the princess. On her 16th birthday she will prick her finger on a spinning wheel and die. The fairies decide that the best solution is to make her fall asleep instead. They make her fall asleep for 100 years.
They couldn't UNDO the curse? They're fairies aren't they?