It's Valentine's Day - Does Love Mean Husbands Have To Find That Perfect Gift - Again?
Husbands Dread This Holiday
I suspect the most dreaded of holidays for husbands is Valentine's Day. Nearly all the men I've ever known share these feelings. I feel sorry for them as it took all the mental stress they could suffer just to find the perfect Christmas present a few weeks ago.
But that's not enough! The wife has come to believe that Valentine's Day is synonymous with love and if he loves her, he'll buy her jewelry, flowers or a box of chocolates. If the calendar schedules it and every type of ad forecasts it, it cannot be avoided.
The husband can schedule work hours that keep him away on February 14 or claim to have no money, or return on the 15th after having been abducted by aliens, but no excuse will suffice. It's Valentine's Day and he's expected to deliver, thus proving his love.
For years, it was an occasion for wives to be the recipient of gifts. Only recently have women begun to see that perhaps the rules might apply both ways if love will be proven.
Those first years of marriage have put more husbands in the doghouse than Fido spent in a lifetime because of this one holiday. Usually, if hubby remembered at all, on February 14, he would run into a store on the way home from work. There he would join the other husbands desperately trying to choose which of the last five cards might be suitable and perfectly describe his love. Because he knows from experience that a card is not enough, now he must find the perfect gift. Knowing that she had a headache last night, he settles on the bigger box of aspirins.
How many divorces could have been avoided if love was properly understood? Love cannot be measured in carets, flowers or candy. It is spontaneous. It is like breathing and the giver and the recipient both are aware of this. For the definition of love, one only needs to go to the Bible and read I Corinthians 13 where it is fully defined.
For those of us who have been married forty-some years, we learned a long time ago what love means and how to communicate our expectations. For example, if either of us want candy on Valentine's Day, we 'expect' we'd better get down to the drug store and get chocolates while they last...his box a sampler and mine with nuts.