- HubPages»
- Books, Literature, and Writing»
- Commercial & Creative Writing»
- Creative Writing»
- Humor Writing
50 Brilliant Facts (I just made up)
- The organisation of Bees roughly mimics that of the Swedish Government.
- Cats do not have 9 lives. They have only 6.
- Horses have 12 Horsepower. Cats have 0.5 Horsepower.
- Mice live on average for 73 years.
- Tom from 'Tom and Jerry' became a raging alcoholic after quitting the show. His alcoholism caused him to crash his car in the Summer of 1972, after which he was killed.
- Grass is made up of 3 compounds. Horses, Fossils, Radioactive waste. It's green color comes from envy of weeds.
- Dogs can hear a tin of food opening from 3 miles away. However they cannot hear "Come on, back to your lead now." even when said directly to them.
- Cats are an excellent source of potassium.
- Hats make a person 21 times more likely to succeed.
- Superman was real. He came a town in Northern Russia in 1922, however was killed after the great Kryptonite fire of 1945.
- Tents are 3 times more likely to steal your purse than the average man.
- The VCR player was invented before the TV
- The average TV is 21% Plastic, 12% Metal, 67% Awesome.
- Gravy is said to prevent cancer and increase sex-appeal.
- Magnets work by by being sexually attracted to metal objects. Their turn offs are wood, plastic and power-ballads.
- Helicopters work by continuously pressing the "X" Jump button.
- Mobile phones work by harnessing the power of magic.
- Ice-Cream companies invested in £2 million in 2005 to determine whether or not tonsils were harmful. Their findings suggested they were.
- 8.2 Trillion people slip, trip and fall every year.
- The average human spends 2 years looking in the mirror thinking "Phwooar I would."
- Field-Mice have the best health-care in the UK.
- Horses speak in Latvian.
- Computers are filled with chocolate, sweets and dreams.
- Dodgems can be legally driven on roads in Arkansas.
- God's XBOX-Live name is "YrFkinLordAlmighty02"
- Atlantic City was raised from the sea in 1822. The bodies of Mermaids were sold at local fishmongers markets for years to come.
- When first popular, people used to run up and down trains to create lateral movement. Early trains were not popular amongst the disabled.
- SPAM is made from baby tears and puppies.
- In 1987 the Nuclear Arms race reached it's height, when a boy in Russia was born with arms that measured 30 meters long.
- Early Wind-Turbines were used to make sushi.
- Trees have roots so that they cannot walk. Walking trees were a common problem in the early 20th Century.
- Radiators are Radioactive.
- The chief supervisor of the Nuclear Power Plants in Venezuela is named Homer Simpson.
- Xbox Live was first predicted in the Bible.
- The first book ever printed was "The top 10 styles this summer 1633 - Swimsuit edition"
- Darwin invented the first remote-controlled car.
- Horses are made from Children's dreams and Glue.
- The metal Porsche cars are made from are said to reduce the size of a person's penis.
- Mothers day was invented 4,000BC by Eve, after her years of crack misuse had led her to take upon a self-important view of herself.
- Carrots are Blue-Tooth enabled.
- Head-Phones work by having mini-people in each ear which play the songs you wish to hear.
- Pillows are made from clouds.
- Planes used to be launched into the air by use of a giant slingshot.
- Cans of deodorant have snakes inside of them, hence the hissing noise.
- Attics are an excellent place to hide bodies.
- After medical testing, the best way to prevent prostate cancer is by using a plug of some form.
- Donkeys kick because their front legs are welded to their ground.
- Shoe-boxes are ideally used as houses for extremely small people.
- 9/10 cats that read this will be high.
- Mice can't read French.