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39-Love Letters from Vietnam: You Fulfill My Needs
The Power of Love - Andre Bocelli
16 November, 1969
For a Complete List of all of the Tim and Kate Letters, click here.
Dearest Kate, My Love and my Life,
It was so good to talk with you today. The sound of your voice, the love and encouragement you offer gives me strength to face another week.
I hope our calls give you comfort, happiness, and strength also, my love. But sometimes, my life, when my emotions well up inside of me, I’m unable to say what I feel. I want to give you so much. I can’t give anything. Kate, nothing gives me such pain, or makes me feel as helpless as the inability to fulfill your needs because, Kate, that’s all I’ve come to live for. When I fail, as I’m bound to do because I’m selfish and weak, please, please forgive me.
Tomorrow is the start of another empty week without you, Kate. How I need you to fill the void within my being. We are one, and yet because of our separation, we must live the week half complete. United Kate, life would be no challenge for our love. When I’m confused, I’d have your wisdom to guide me. When I despair, I’d have your goodness to reassure me. When I’m depressed, I’d have your smile and sparkling eyes to give me joy. When I’m selfish, I’d have your selflessness to be an example. When I’m weak in my convictions, I’d have your strength of character to reaffirm mine. When the people about me seem too much to bear, I’d have your hand to comfort me. Only you can fulfill my needs. Only you have the keys to my heart and soul. Because I love you so much, Kate, my most important need is to fulfill your needs. I can never be happy unless I’m doing that twenty-four hours a day as your husband.
Even now, Kate, across the miles, you give me so much. Only you and my thoughts of you make the army bearable.
Well, it’s getting late now and I’d better close. Have a good week my love. Be happy.
17 November, 1969
Hello my love and my life. How are you? Happy and well I pray. I hope school has been going smoothly, Kate, and the David situation is well in hand*
Well, we bowled tonight. O’Brien and I didn’t do badly as far as our averages were concerned, but we were no match for the opposition. We was murdered! We lost four out of four games. Before tonight, we were 3rd in the league. Now? Oh well. And I was just becoming thoroughly convinced I’d never have to look for my name on another duty roster again. But all is not lost yet.
I received your letter today, my love, telling me of the first snowfall in Milwaukee. It sounded beautiful. How I long to be able to share that beauty with you. It was the snowy time of the year when we first met. What a beautiful, beautiful season.
O Kate, Kate, how I’ve missed you. My love grows with each hour that passes.
It’s late now, and I’d better get some sleep if I want to stay awake in class tomorrow. Take care of yourself, Kate. You now have two lives in your hands. God bless you.
**(David was a little 10 year old deaf boy who had just transferred to our school from somewhere in the south, maybe Appalachia. He had few oral skills (our mode of teaching before I transferred to a school whose philosophy was to use sign language) and he was emotionally disturbed. His main outlet was to draw any kind of military machinery, mostly aircraft dropping bombs, machine guns firing, and people lying dead. Since my class was designated as emotionally disturbed deaf children, we was assigned to my class. Fortunately, my team teacher, Mrs. A, had a miraculous capacity for patience and love and David often went to her for Math or Reading and came back becalmed!
Index to All Tim and Kate Letters
Click here for Index to all letters from Tim to Kate and Kate to Tim from the beginning of Tim's enlistment to the point of today's posting.
19, November, 1969
Well, my love, today has been boring, routine – as a matter of fact, the only good thing about today is that it’s over, and it’s one day closer to the time I’ll be with you. Now that I think about it, that does make it a good day. O my life, how I miss you. As the weeks become few, time seems to slow down. And sometimes when my heart seems to reach through space and touch yours, time stops. I love you, Kate, with a love that grows day by day, a love that sustains me, a love that has become the object of my whole life. You are my life, Kate.
How have things been in Milwaukee? Any more snow? It’s been getting colder here, no snow though, just cold rain. Sometimes it’s warm enough here to go about in short sleeves. But I’d much rather be chilled to the bone plowing my way through Milwaukee snow. That is plowing my way to your door. How’s your lesson planning coming, Kate? Devoting anymore time to it? You probably do more than enough work.
Kate, I’ve just talked to you. How much you give this poor GI. I hope I can return some of that happiness to you, my love. Our talk made it possible for me to face the rest of the week, for Kate, while I’ve been here at Ft.Gordon, I’ve lived only for your letters and our phone conversations. Thank you. Thank you, Kate, for making this place bearable for me. If only I could give to you all you have given me. Take care of yourself, Kate. Give my love to our family.