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A Bittersweet Goodbye

Updated on January 14, 2020
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Linda has been writing Poetry & other genre's since she was a young girl. Her passion for writing brings her healing & peace.

Cat Scan

Me getting one of many cat scans.
Me getting one of many cat scans. | Source

Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer

Non-small cell lung cancer is a group of lung cancers that behave similarly, such as squamous cell carcinoma and adenocarcinoma.Symptoms are a cough that won't go away, shortness of breath, weight loss, or coughing up blood.Treatments include surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation. Source: Mayo Clinic

Tribute Poem

I walk into the hospital waiting room with apprehension

I look around and see I’m not the only one with tension

An old lady sits silently in the corner wiping away her tears

Her misery does little to dissipate my fears

I feel sick to my stomach when I see a girl so young

Merely ten years old, her life has only just begun

She looks back at me with swollen red eyes

Her mom sitting next to her, grips her hand tight and cries


I take a seat and try to only imagine the best

I can’t focus on what they found from that blood test

I came in a week ago for a simple check up, not concerned in the least

I can still see the doctor trying to choose his words with care, his brow creased

The words ‘lung cancer’ won’t cease to echo in my head

I hear my name called by the nurse but my feet feel like lead


I get up and follow her through the white halls

My heart hammers in my chest and down my cheek a tear falls

I can’t keep up this stoic facade any longer, I feel the walls I built up crumble

Somehow we managed to make it to the MRI room and I begin to tremble

Inside the large machine I have too much time to think

The stress has drained my energy and into my dreams I sink

I dream I’m with my father who died years ago

He's glowing like an angel, his hair white as snow


My dad looks at me with love and tells me he’ll see me in a year

He fades away and I am left with nothing but fear

I feel deep in my gut I need to turn around

I turn, my knees give, and I hit the ground

I see myself in a casket lying limp and dead

I awake with a start ~sobbing and thinking about what my father had said


Soon I return to hear the results from the test

For weeks I have been awaiting the results in unrest

The doctor tells me the cancer has spread

He gives me no hope, within a year I will be dead

There are no words that can sum up everything I am thinking

I just stare ahead at the wall, not moving nor blinking

Why me? why now? I'm only thirty-seven!

I don’t want to go! will I even get into heaven?


The doctor gets worried and shakes me back to earth

He says he is sorry and he hates giving bad news for what it’s worth

My mom sobbed when I told her the news

First my father, now me, she has nothing left to lose

She held me tight as I murmured how I’m afraid to die

Holding on to my mom for dear life I whispered a final goodbye

I felt the life drain from my body and the image of my sleeping mother faded away

Feeling light, I opened my eyes to see myself standing before a large gateway


The gates open and I’m flooded with the feeling of love

There is a flash of light and before me stands my father and the Lord above

They reach out their hands, I take them and I follow their strut

My breath is taken away at the sight of heaven, and the gates behind me clank shut


*Note* This Loving Tribute poem was Written by my niece, Ellie Arne~in dedication to me- Auntie Linda. Inspired and loosely based on my lung cancer journey in 2004.




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© 2013 Linda Rogers

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