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A Funny Bone Is Humerus

Updated on September 13, 2016
Jodah profile image

John values the use of humour and enjoys writing and reading limericks and jokes. He is a fan of Monty Python, Mr Bean, Black Books etc.

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John Ernst Steinbeck, Jr. was an American author of twenty-seven books, including sixteen novels, six non-fiction books, and five collections of short stories
John Ernst Steinbeck, Jr. was an American author of twenty-seven books, including sixteen novels, six non-fiction books, and five collections of short stories | Source
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A Funny Bone Is Humerus

by John Hansen © 2013


Orang-utans are orange,

Blue whales are blue(ish)

Black bears are black

Blackbirds are too(ish).


Boxing rings aren't round,

Brass monkeys aren't apes

Friendships aren't love boats

Grapes of wrath aren't grapes.


Ice cream Sundays aren't a day of the week.

Hamburgers aren't made with ham.

Potato gems aren't valuable,

Doors aren't meant to jam.


Butterflies aren't flies (or made of butter).

Batman's not half bat

Silverfish aren't fish

Meerkats aren't merely cats.


Lady birds aren't birds

Rhinoceros aren't dinosaurus

Cat burglars don't steal cats

.A funny bone is humerus.

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    • ocfireflies profile image

      ocfireflies 3 years ago from North Carolina

      Dear Jodah,

      My Man Seuss would be proud as am I. Voted Up and always Shared.

      As you may imagine, my day has started off with smile. Your poem just helps to keep that smile smiling. Thank You.

      Kim

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      How fun. Please do not tell my son that little toads do not sit on little stools in the woods.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 3 years ago from Shelton

      Cute and yes Dr. Suessish..:) voted cute

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I was laughing at the title so the rest of this was a bonus. :)

    • suzettenaples profile image

      Suzette Walker 3 years ago from Taos, NM

      My goodness, this is delightful and whimsical! I so enjoyed reading this!

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 3 years ago from USA

      Very cute! I liked this!

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Dear Kim, glad I could start your day off with a smile. That makes my day. Thanks as always for the vote up and share.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Shhh! Eric, mom's the word. But they don't...lol.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Frank, I've always been a Dr Seuss fan, so am humbled by the comparison.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Bill, yeah the title just had to be written..glad it raised a laugh.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Suzette, glad you enjoyed it too.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Flourish. I think they need a new category for voting up, "cute"...haha.

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 3 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Well this sure struck my funny bone, lol, very good.

    • Nellieanna profile image

      Nellieanna Hay 3 years ago from TEXAS

      You've such a flair for wit and whimsy. I love this! (giggling)

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 3 years ago from Dubai

      Great poem, enjoyed reading.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you,

      Jackie, hope your funny bone recovers soon..

      Nellieanna, good to see you and glad I could get you giggling. I appreciate your comment, yep I'm on a whimsical streak.

      Velour, glad you enjoyed this.

    • Kamalesh050 profile image

      Kamalesh050 3 years ago from Sahaganj, Dist. Hooghly, West Bengal, India

      Beautiful and funny... very much enjoyed the poem. Well done!

      Have a good day. Best Wishes, Kamalesh

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Kamalesh,

      Thanks for visiting and taking the time to read this poem. Your comments are kind. You have a good day too.

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 3 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      This one is charming and so very amusing, one can't help but smile. Nicely done. :)

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey Jo, thanks for reading this and your kind comment. Glad it gave you a smile.

    • Mary McShane profile image

      Mary McShane 3 years ago from Fort Lauderdale, Florida

      Nicely constructed, voted up and funny.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for the vote up Mary, glad it tickled your funny bone.

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 3 years ago from south Florida

      One of your best humerus poems, Jodah. Bravo!

    • jhamann profile image

      Jamie Lee Hamann 3 years ago from Reno NV

      Witty and absolutely entertaining! Well done! Jamie

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Drbj, wow you really think so? Thanks for that compliment. I'm constantly trying to improve my writing, but it is difficult to grow funnier. I just retread your comment...this is my only humerus poem..lol.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Glad you enjoyed it Jamie, thanks for the compliment.

    • wetnosedogs profile image

      wetnosedogs 3 years ago from Alabama

      Talented and funny poem. Brightened up my evening. Thanks.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      It makes me happy to know this poem is bringing a few smiles to people. Thanks for your generous comment wetnosedogs.

    • imocat profile image

      Shellie 3 years ago from Salt Lake City, Utah

      Fun poem! I enjoyed it very much and appreciated the Seussiness of it. It is not easy to write humorous (or humerus) poetry :)

      I have a day off today, and am looking forward to reading more of your writing.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Shellie, just as you were reading and commenting on this hub, I was doing the same with one of yours. You will find quite a few of my poems 'humorous', I hope. I like to make people smile, though I also have my serious side in regard to subjects I feel strongly about.

      Thank you for comparing this to Dr Seuss, I have had a few such comments for this poem, and that blows me away...he's a long time idol of mine. Thanks for your kind comments, have a great day off.

    • Eric Flynn profile image

      Eric Wayne Flynn 3 years ago from Providence, Rhode Island

      Jodah, Jodah, Jodah, Jodah (chant)... Fun one.

      EWF

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 3 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Oh dear, never a disappointment to come back to HP! Very clever! It's not a joke to write something funny, eh? One must possess that certain skill and you're a bang on!

      Voted up and sharing!

      Cheers!

    • word55 profile image

      Word 3 years ago from Chicago

      How about all this. Wonderfully done. Keep up the good work!

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Always good to have you read my hubs Eric, chants are most welcome..haha.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Great to see you back Cris, true it's not a joke unless people find it funny. So being a clown ain't easy...lol. Thanks for your kind comments, voting up and sharing.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey word55, thanks for reading, and your wonderful encouragement.

    • annart profile image

      Ann Carr 3 years ago from SW England

      This is hilarious and so clever! I love it. Like bill, I was already laughing at the title and the rest didn't disappoint. Great. I love plays on words because language is my 'thing'. Thanks for giving me a laugh at the end of the day. Ann

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      My pleasure Ann, it's my aim to make people smile. It doesn't matter if it's to start their day or end it....but a smile's a smile.

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      lol! I love this! and yes its so true! thanks for making me smile!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 3 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Ain't that the truth! Well done! A known fact is the sun does shine! :)

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Nell, the more smiles I am responsible for the better.

      Hey Sunshine, afraid I can't argue with that one..lol. Thanks for you kind comment too.

    • Crystal Tatum profile image

      Crystal Tatum 3 years ago from Georgia

      Very clever indeed! Voting up and awesome.

    • profile image

      Jodah 3 years ago

      Thanks for the vote up and kind comment

      Jodah

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 3 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      This is funny and very clever, Jodah! Thanks for the laugh.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Crystal and Alicia, for you generous comments. Glad you got a laugh out of it.

    • RachaelOhalloran profile image

      Rachael O'Halloran 2 years ago from United States

      I managed to miss this among your hubs, Jodah. You shared it and brought it to my attention and I'm glad you did. This was a hoot. Voted up and funny!

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Rachael, glad it gave you a laugh. I heave been sharing a few of my hubs that have had fewer views on Facebook and Google+ to increase their traffic. Thanks for the vote up.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image

      Victoria Lynn 2 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      So clever! I loved this!!!

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 2 years ago from Nashville Tn.

      Well done Jodah! This tickled my funnybone :)

      Voted up and sharing all around.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 2 years ago

      You are so clever! I had a great laugh on this post.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for loving it Victoria Lynn. Have a great day.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Audrey, for sharing and voting up. Glad it gave you a laugh

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you for reading Dianna, glad it gave you a laugh too.

    • rebeccamealey profile image

      Rebecca Mealey 2 years ago from Northeastern Georgia, USA

      Lot's of fun to read, a nice play on words. You're so talented!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you rebecca. You are too kind.

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 2 years ago from Florida

      Congrats on winning a Hubbie Award! This is just too funny!

      Voted UP, etc. and shared.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Much appreciated Mary, and thank you for reading this, vote up and share. Glad it hit your funny bone.

    • Phyllis Doyle profile image

      Phyllis Doyle Burns 2 years ago from High desert of Nevada.

      I love it, Jodah. Sometimes we just gotta be in a moment of fun. Thank you for this moment, Jodah.

    • Shyron E Shenko profile image

      Shyron E Shenko 2 years ago from Texas

      John, this is so well done and I enjoyed reading from beginning to end. Now every time I see a butter fly I will think of your poem. It is poems like this that stick in my head.

      Wonderful, loved it, voted up across the board and shared.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      A beautiful write here and such a great thought too.

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 2 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Of course I'm not surprised this brought a smile to my face! I want to CONGRATULATE you, Jodah! You well-deserve the 2014 Best Poet Award. I'm happy you will continue to grace us and entertain us with your wonderful talents!.....Up++++ Peace, Paula

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      you are so right Phyllis, we have to make time for a moment of fun. Glad his did it for you.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Haha thanks Shyron, sorry to spoil your image of a butterfly.Thanks for the vote up and share.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you so much Devika.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Paula for the congratulations. I was lucky, and I'm not going anywhere soon...got to try to defend my title next year. :)

      Appreciate the vote up too. peace.

    • DealForALiving profile image

      Sam Deal 2 years ago from Earth

      So imaginative and fun to read. How do you come up with these?

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey DealForLiving. The truth is I never know what my mind is going to come up with next. Thanks for your kind comment.

    • Paula Atwell profile image

      Paula Atwell 2 years ago from Cleveland, OH

      We have a running joke in our house about Sirius Black from Harry Potter and his brother Humorous

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Ok Paula, that's funny.... :) thanks for reading.

    • Shyron E Shenko profile image

      Shyron E Shenko 2 years ago from Texas

      I am back to re-read this, voted up UAFBI and shared.

      Funny bones are not funny,

      I've banged mine a time or two

      Others may think it funny

      I don't think you would if it were you

      But, your poem was funny as can be

      And the funny bones it struck

      they aren't where they use to be.

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      haha Shyron, thanks for revisiting and added your fun verse to it....very funny, but funny bones aren't,I agree.

    • LadyFiddler profile image

      Joanna Chandler 2 years ago from On planet Earth

      LOL so Jodah you see the rubbish they teach us from a tender age? lol because the words aren't even related to the item, thing, animal or place.

      I speak English and sometimes I say it's a stupid language it has same words , same spellings different meanings e.g. "Read etc . Then they tell us the letter in the word is silent then why is it there ? steups

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Exactly Lady Fiddler. Nothing makes sense. I don't see the purpose of silent letters either. It's a funny language.

    • Harry Higinbotham profile image

      Harry Higinbotham 23 months ago

      This reminds me a lot of Ogden Nash. Is he an influence of yours, John?

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 23 months ago from Queensland Australia

      I can't say he is Harry. I have heard the name but I am not familiar with any of his writing as far as I know. I will have to research him.

    • Harry Higinbotham profile image

      Harry Higinbotham 23 months ago

      I highly recommend him. My late aunt introduced my to three wonderful authors: Ogden Nash, James Thurber, and Walt Kelly (Pogo comic strip). They've had a profound impact on my writing style, along with Dr. Suess & Shel Silverstein. BTW- your hubs have inspired me to create my own. I had some initial doubts that my style of poetry would have an audience, but you've proved that it will. I'm excited to begin!

    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 23 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks again Harry, I will check out all three authors, though I am familiar with 'Pogo'. Dr Seuss inspired me growing up. I am glad my hubs have actually inspired you as well and I can't wait to read your poetry. Good luck.

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