A Letter to My Sixteen-Year-Old Self
Dear Ms. I Think I Know Everything,
It may seem as if your life is spiraling out of control. You don't know who to trust and you don't know where you're going. In due time, all of it will make sense.
I know losing your sister hurt you like a ton of bricks falling on your head, but do you want to know a secret? There will come a day where you will have finally moved on. Her death won't hurt as much as it does right now. You will eventually learn to talk about her without crying. Isn't that awesome to know.
I know this isn't the only thing that is bothering you at the moment. That guy that you're upset over, I wish I could tell you that it gets better, but it doesn't. He gets married and has a child. Do you remember discussing children and marriage with him? Unfortunately, you aren't the one. It may hurt, but you don't let it steal your joy. Yet, in the bottom of your heart, you wish him and his family all the best.
Now you're probably wondering what happened to your best friend. You date, but then you discover that your relationship isn't going anywhere. While you two broke up, he hooked up with one of his friends and he gets her pregnant. You're upset, but guess what? He tells you to get over it. Isn't that amazing? (Can you sense the sarcasm?)
He actually wants you to not be upset about his philandering ways. You already know he was very promiscuous before you two started dating. Somehow, you thought you would be the one worth changing for. Although, he has never cheated on you. Every time he hooks up with another woman, you two are already broken up. Yep, the on and off again relationship continues. But, you'll be happy to know that eventually, it ends for good.
Turns out, when you get older, your values will change and what is okay now won't be okay in six years. Before you break up with him, you have a heart-to-heart with yourself. You know your relationship will come to end, you just don't know how it will end. So you slowly pull away from him and you stop calling and texting him. He will wonder why and all you can say is you're giving him space.
Honestly, the real reason why the relationship must end is because you two don't see eye to eye on anything. That gets annoying after awhile. He wants to have more children, but you know our policy: NO KIDS BEFORE MARRIAGE! He doesn't want to get married, but you do. He tells you that all the time, but for some reason, you never believe him. That, I don't understand. Yeah, we're weird.
I think I'm telling you way too much. But you need to know because you're young and you spent most of your life worrying about guys. However, when you grow up, they won't matter to you as much as they do right now.
Don't worry, it's not the end of the world. You will learn to not settle. At this point in your life, you have always settled for mediocrity. I'm here to tell you, you will have to stop. You have to know your worth. You're more amazing than you give yourself credit for. You can and will do anything your heart wishes.
Do you want to know about college or should I save that for a later post?
Alright, I won't go into all the details, but I will say this: college is fun! You become more of yourself. Since you are promiscuous in high school, you won't be promiscuous in college. Those days are over.
I won't give you any more information than that.
The good thing about growing up and relinquishing your need to please everyone is you become more happier than you've ever been.
You decide to pursue writing full time and you can actually say you're a published writer. Not just writing stuff on Facebook and MySpace. You decide to give it all your all and it is profitable for you.
Isn't it amazing to know you will become better than you are right now? Remember our motto: MAKE EACH DAY AND/OR YEAR BETTER THAN THE LAST.
Some things you won't understand at first, but in due time, it will make sense.
I want you to always look at the sky. That is your view. Always aim high and never low. No more mediocrity!
I love you always.