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Emptiness - A Poem

Updated on March 12, 2011

A Poem:?


I was asked to write a poem containing the following words

soul please apple streets secret dark begging fruit heart

I am not sure if I am a poet but let´s try it. Here it is...


Emptiness


in the dark streets

leading to the secret places

of forgotten emptiness



you meet the old wise man

begging for an apple



please, give me this fruit ...

and your heart and soul

will be free

to join the other universe



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    • I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s profile image

      I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s 7 years ago

      wow, this speeks volumes! Nice :)

    • nextstopjupiter profile image
      Author

      nextstopjupiter 7 years ago from here, there and everywhere

      Thanks for the comment, I just decided to became a poet!

    • kartika damon profile image

      kartika damon 7 years ago from Fairfield, Iowa

      love this! Here I'm giving it a try:

      Walking these apple streets

      I'm begging for the dark fruit

      And my soul asks, please give me the secret

      of your soul.

    • wavegirl22 profile image

      Shari 7 years ago from New York, NY

      I have to agree with I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s . . .it speaks volumes and then some. I really liked it. . and look forward to your new status as a poet!

    • nextstopjupiter profile image
      Author

      nextstopjupiter 7 years ago from here, there and everywhere

      Thanks, kartika, thanks wavegirl22, for encouragement, let's go on!

    • kartika damon profile image

      kartika damon 7 years ago from Fairfield, Iowa

      Poets make the world go round and life worth living!

    • k@ri profile image

      k@ri 7 years ago from Sunny Southern California

      Seems you are a poet! You should try it more often. :D

    • profile image

      Ibrahim Berr 7 years ago

      Great poem very insightful

    • prettydarkhorse profile image

      prettydarkhorse 7 years ago from US

      wow, nice poem Bernd, I dont knwo that you can write too aside from your music, how are you? Maita

    • Ben Zoltak profile image

      Ben Zoltak 7 years ago from Lake Mills, Jefferson County, Wisconsin USA

      You indeed are a poet my friend nextstopjupiter, warm and inviting words!

      Ben

    • Dolores Monet profile image

      Dolores Monet 7 years ago from East Coast, United States

      Lovely poem, glad that I stopped in. You say that you don't ordinarily write poetry? Well, you should do it more often!

    • ddsurfsca profile image

      ddsurfsca 7 years ago from ventura., california

      I am a poet, and it isn't easy. Yours is very good for a first attempt especially. One thing that might make it easier, is after you are finished, read it outloud, to see if the timing is right. That is half the battle.

    • Lita C. Malicdem profile image

      Lita C. Malicdem 7 years ago from Philippines

      That' a nice try. Keep it up!

    • bonny2010 profile image

      bonetta hartig 7 years ago from outback queensland

      what do you mean you just decided to become a poet - think you were born one mate - poetry comes in all forms and the one that comes from the heart is the best kind - thank you for this read.

    • MeditateForPeace profile image

      MeditateForPeace 6 years ago from Maine, USA

      i want to say i like it, but somehow the regular words beautiful, great... just don't capture.. i wonder what your definition of emptiness is here?

    • MeditateForPeace profile image

      MeditateForPeace 6 years ago from Maine, USA

      i think i'm seeing the connection to meditation.. i wonder if you will write a bit explaining the connection so i that i can post the explanation as a comment (or you could) on the Meditate for Peace facebook page where you kindly posted a link to this poem.. just a thought :) very nice work..

    • profile image

      ellinor 6 years ago

      That was a good poem, you are always welcome to stop by,have a bed and a meal.Have an excellent day. (location Denmark, not that far away from you)

    • lxxy profile image

      lxxy 6 years ago from Beneath, Between, Beyond

      Great way to connect them together!

      Awesome poem!

    • michael's son profile image

      Nicholas Michael Gitzinger 6 years ago from the mazes of minds

      Oh wow this is a great prose. Its message is clear, yet encrypted, It is strong, yet silent, It is without rhyme and a beautiful poem. A lot of people have a problem with prose do to the lack of rhyme, they find it difficult to flow. But this is a flawless execution of a prose. I LOVE IT.

    • zduckman profile image

      zduckman 5 years ago

      Beautiful, I love it. thank you.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 5 years ago from South Africa

      Wow! Writing a poem with words given to you is not at all easy. You deserve 'awesome'!

    • Shalini Kagal profile image

      Shalini Kagal 5 years ago from India

      Bernd - that was awesome :)

    • carolp profile image

      Carolina 5 years ago from Switzerland

      You did made a beautiful poem out of those words. A nice combination reflecting a thought, a meaning. Thanks for sharing.

    • NiaLee profile image

      NiaLee 5 years ago from BIG APPLE

      Saying so much

      in a few words

      when given

      a few words

      you just brushed

      a whole world

      you just opened the door to a new world

      apple, old men, wisdom

      you gave us some

      Thank you so much, your poem meets me where I was standing and wandering, your poem is a real jewel that shines like a star, its light showers me and I say: yes, thank you.

    • Ardie profile image

      Sondra 5 years ago from Neverland

      I love this! You were given words and came up with a beautiful poem :)

    • EuroNinila profile image

      Fotinoula Gypsyy 4 years ago from NYC BABY

      Nice! I probably wouldn't know what to come up with if I was given words to put a poem together with!

    • CloudExplorer profile image

      Mike Pugh 4 years ago from New York City

      I just love your poetry its very interesting, and deep, nicely written.

      Thumbs up and getting shared for sure, nice!

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Great imaginations in poetry here thanks

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