"Why?" is a poem I wrote after dealing with, and conquering, an eating disorder that took a year of my life away from me. It was inspired by the pride I felt for taking control of my life back, and from all the emotions I remember from that horrific year. Girls, boys, women, and men, need the chance to live their lives avoiding the distorted self-imagery that currently surrounds us.
He read my weight in kilograms, and you began to cry
As I watched the sad tears well and spill, I pathetically asked myself why?
Why do I continue to harm my health when I see it causes such pain?
What benefit would I achieve? What could I possibly gain?
I write this poem in a healthy weight, one year and four months past
I knew I could never stay that thin, I knew it would never last
The pain and hurt I saw that night in the hospital testing space
I never again want to see the looks I saw in my parent's face
I remember my mother crying in the corner, on the chair
While my father wrapped his arms around me and continuously kissed my hair
I am sorry for all the suffering and the tears I made you cry
Still to this day, and for the rest of my life, I will always wonder why