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A Poem To Lupus (An Original Poem)

Updated on May 12, 2015

This silence, these four walls

The voice in my head,

I'm breathless, I'm lifeless

Yet I know I'm not dead.

Many times I wonder

How the hell did I get here...

I was happy, I was smiling

Now I don't even care.

You took me, you broke me

When I thought you could not,

I tried so hard to mend me

I gave it my best shot.

It's a battle to keep up with you

The way you want me to live,

All you do is take, take, take

Never wanting to give.

You took over my life

Never once being fair,

I've tried to maintain my strength

But it disappeared into thin air.

I've become someone I don't know

So lost and distant,

So many things have changed

Yet you've remained constant.

The silence is deafening

I have to get away,

There has to be more to life

Than suffering from day to day.

I've screamed out in rage

I've tried to be calm,

I've tried everything with you

Still you won't leave me alone.

"Be rational" I've begged

Just give me a break,

Just one day will do

One day without seeing your face.

You think it's easy for me?

Hurting the people I love?

You think its easy

When it hurts to give a hug?

I've been forsaken by family and friends

Left out in the cold,

A social life doesn't exist anymore

So I spend my days at home.

My body just isn't the same

There's a different reflection in the mirror,

I know I shouldn't be this negative

But my esteem you have devoured.

Lupus, you've stolen so much from me

Things I'll never have again,

But still I remain unbroken

Throughout the tears, the anger and the pain.

I've struggled for years with you

And I know there's more to come,

But I'm prepared to win this battle

Because I know I'm not alone.

God has me surrounded by angels

Each whispering to me,

"Keep strong my lupie sister"

We're gonna beat this chronic disease!!!

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