A letter to DEATH – a personal communique
Yeah it’s a letter to you only. You are surprised? Well, should be. But I don’t have any other way to get in touch. I hope you read this. Well if I get a reply from you it will be sort of quite interesting event. Do not know what will be the kind of your response aka reply, nevertheless I am waiting and I think some way or the other I will get a reply.
I came to know about your sudden visit to one whom I never knew. Ranjit, Husband of my maid had an untimely meeting with you yesterday and he is gone. It’s almost twenty four hours of his death; I mean your meeting with him. I somehow could not release my pain deep down in my heart so this option to write a letter to you. What best alternative one may have instead of direct communication? I am using the word communication intentionally as I hope there will be some answers somewhere somehow to reach me.
SSaraswati is my maid who just joined me in the month of June this year. She only cooks for our family. Very lively and she has dignity of her own. She has two sons, may be one 12 years and the other 9 years old. A happy family only with a little problem of alcoholism of her husband as she used to tell me. Very rarely she will tell her sad story but usually she will be at her vivacious best self to make us all very happy every morning with nice food and caring attitude. She specially was very much connected to me the fact, I often found quite amusing as I am not very talkative and remain busy in my own world. May be one week ago she told me that her husband had gone to Delhi with relative and she is not very happy about it as Ranjit was not keeping well. I said its ok he will be back soon. Then yesterday she sent her sons to inform me to make her a call over phone after I reached home in the evening. As I get connected to her, she just started to cry hysterically and said that Ranjit is dead in Kanpur while he was on his way to Guwahati (Assam – we stay in Guwahati) from New Delhi by Train. Oh dear, it was shocking to my core but I had to comfort her. I do not know but somehow I could control her over phone and the time we passed till today morning was really full of so much suffering. Somehow I managed to control my feelings in front of my son but after I sent him to school I cried for her. I talked with her after draining my tears and could console her. The other formalities will be maintained as it was a police case and her family from New Delhi will go for verification and all. She is scattered and all grief stricken. May his soul rest in peace and God bless Saraswati with little strength to live on.
Ranjit is gone like many other whom I never came to meet. But the facts which stroke me is that death is so random. The appointment is so very much one sided. Nobody knows where will be the destined meeting with death and when exactly. But only truth is that we all have a fixed appointment to be there and to go through with it. May be my friend hubbers will find it little weird to go through my feelings on death of my maids husband. Death is death. It comes and takes away all for sure. Many are our own who died and world becomes dark and little emptier for us. Then we overcome the death of our nearest one and move on with life. The dead person remains in our many folded memory depending on the level of attachment one has on individual level. The attachment I feel to my this maid is very unusual which I never express to her as well and well, I am specially strict about the maintenance and timing of usual household chores. Many times she speaks and I listen to her many stories. I hardly comment. But she poured her heart out in the most difficult time of her life that’s how I know that she also feels the attachment though she can’t name may be. She told me today morning that I she wants to come to me. Our nearest and dearest one with an exclusive name of their relationship needs prove of our care and compassion many times in life. But there is bondage beyond everything which does not requires any standard and name to be strength for another person in life.
Death, you are wonderful as you make many things very distinct in life which are otherwise linger quite blur. I am sad but I have to be Saraswati’s strength as I have to respect the faith she has in me. Many relatives do not have that much trust but some relation for me is more meaningful then the usual one for the depth in it. Many people dies and this is the most common thing in life. But then the venue, time and the way chosen by Death to fix every individual life is very extra – ordinary as one may not find any reason thereof. Even I do not know my destined appointment with you, How it wil be, when and where exactly Death will meet me? And very intentionally I will wait for that coveted time.
Thank you and looking forward to meet you. Oh well we are all in waiting line whoever is living here. Time is ticking by and we are going ahead for the interesting(!) meeting for sure. Though it cannot be a pleasure meeting as emptiness of different level follows closely but it is the most evident thing on earth.
Yours MOST truly,
(oh you know me well, for sure)
Date: 13 – 09 -12
Place:- Guwahati, Assam , India