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Avoiding All Those Scams (Humour)

Updated on May 11, 2011

Differentiating Scams From Giving

I wanted to write a simple article about the many scams out there and give you advice whether you want it or not.  I will present the various pitfalls to be aware of and also present you with alternative solutions. 

Nigerian Scam Letters

Mostly a thing of the past, these letters come through explaining that a wealthy relative was recently killed or met up with an accident.  However, a vast secret stash of money is hidden and needs to be transferred over to an overseas account.  Whereupon, the receiver collects twenty percent and the rest is withdrawn by the author. 

I am counseling you to stay away from these types of letters.  I assure you that I have no rich relatives with enormous amounts of money.  I have never been to Nigeria nor do I ever wish to go there.  Lastly, I do not want in on your bank account as I have enough problems running my own.

So the best solution is to send your money to:  RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2.  

Investment Scams

These people ask you for money which promises an extremely high rate of return with no risk to you.  We all know that that is not being honest. 

Let's be honest for a change and just send your money to:  RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2 .  I can guarantee that you will get no rate of return on this and the risk factor could not be higher.  

Get Rich Quick Schemes

Want to make loads of money without making the slightest effort?  I don't believe there is a way to do this.  However, if I can get as many of you to send me money to:  RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2,  I just might be able to send you a note back telling you how I did it.  

Phishing

This one is very tricky.  Emails come in from websites that look identical to banking institutions asking for bank accounts and passwords to update the account.  Never ever give your passwords and banking information through emails.  If you are going to send any money online or transfer money, it is better write your check/money transfer and mail it out the old fashion way to: RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2. That way you know you are parting with the exact amount of money you are specifying. 

Dream Vacation Scams

These come in the form of phone calls, emails, pop ups etc.  They promise that if you send a limited amount of money, you can get an exotic vacation adventure.  This is phony and nothing could be further from the truth.  You would be better to contribute to someone else's exotic vacation (most notably mine) by sending some money over to: RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2. 

Well I hope that I have assisted you by summarizing the pitfalls of the various scams that are circulating out there.  Remember, it is always better to know exactly where your money is going and in this case, it should be going to: RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2. 

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    • Phillbert profile image

      Phillip Drayer Duncan 

      7 years ago from The Ozarks

      What was that address again??? Hahaha good stuff!

    • Terri Meredith profile image

      Terri Meredith 

      7 years ago from Pennsylvania

      Very funny! Got my first smile of the day reading it!

    • LuisEGonzalez profile image

      Luis E Gonzalez 

      7 years ago from Miami, Florida

      Comical yet insightful. To this day I still receive emails from (Nigeria, South Africa etc) telling me that a long lost relative died and left me a vast sum of money..off course I should send my contact info.

    • Robertj64 profile imageAUTHOR

      Robertj64 

      7 years ago from Burlington, Ontario, Canada

      Hi Aslanlight

      You are not bothering me in the least and I have to say...no...no..I am not being inconvenienced. However, I would like to inquire what exactly a "vast amount of money" would entail. Our readers would love to know.

    • aslanlight profile image

      aslanlight 

      7 years ago from England

      You mean I should send a vast amount of money to myself?

    • RTalloni profile image

      RTalloni 

      7 years ago from the short journey

      Feel free to switch your address with mine in this hub. :)

    • aslanlight profile image

      aslanlight 

      7 years ago from England

      I hope you don't mind me bothering you like this but I suddenly have an irresistable urge to send a vast amount of money to: RMJ Productions, 5353 Lakeshore Road, PO Box 84030 Burlington, Ontario, Canada L7L 6S2.

      I hope that this doesn't inconvenience you in any way and if it does you have my sincere and heartfelt apology.

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