CAPTAIN BUCK NAKED'S ODE
By: Wayne Brown
Can you run through the jungle in your birthday suit?
Without catching your privates on a thorn or a root
Can you swim in the ocean stark naked in the dark,
Without getting a sex change from a lurking white shark?
Can you do cartwheels naked and walk upon your hands,
While you play bass guitar in a three-piece band?
Can you walk totally naked upon the high,high wire?
While juggling sharp swords and swallowing fire?
Do you dream about running around without a stitch?
Do clothes just weigh down your body; constantly itch?
Do have the desire to just throw off all the cotton chains
And go running down the road naked in the rain?
Do all these things keep running around in your mind?
Beggin’ you to jump the fold and get naked anytime?
Though God never made you in the image of a Buddhist
Dr.Freud might say that you are a borderline nudist!
Have you ever wanted to go naked for weeks and weeks?
Or go down the street just a showin’ your lily white cheeks?
Have you ever thought of giving up and becoming a freak?
Running naked in the post office; just a blazing whte streak
Does the desire overwhelm you to run naked at a trot?
Showing all the public most everything you’ve got?
Do you have that burning urge to just go au natural?
And sprint across the food court naked in the mall?
Roger Miller said that you can’t skate in a buffalo herd
But runnin’ round naked? Why he never wrote a word
So maybe there’s a message there for all of us who listen
To oil up that ol’ body and let the naked skin glisten!
Elvis would have loved if he could have rock n rolled nude
Probably would have liked it better than his mama’s food
But he didn’t have the contract to let it hang out on the stage
And Colonel Parker knew it would put all the girls into a rage
Albert Einstein might have tried it in the scientific sense
Naked as a bird while he performed his lab experiments
Exposed there in his naked history for the entire world to see
It just might have helped to shape his theory of relativity
The Beatles could have tried it while they sang all their songs
Sitting around with Ravi Shankar and sucking on a bong
How do we know they didn’t do it while riding on their bus?
Or writing one of those funky songs like ‘I Am the Walrus”?
Could you just imagine how history might have been changed?
If folks had shaped it naked not thinking that it was strange
Washington would have crossed the Potomac just a bit withdrawn
Totally naked in the front of the boat urging his men along
If the world has gone in that direction there’d be no nudist retreats
We’d all be walking buck naked up and down the city streets
Never thinking a thing about it, some natural or with a creative shave
Totally devoid of our clothes but look at the money we would save!
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