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By: Wayne Brown
I got a call from Charlie, his voice whispered quiet and low
Get on over here right away, there something I need to show
Someone just showed up and is right here by my side
Come on over and see, I got me a new mail order bride
Well, I threw down the phone and off to Charlie’s’ I did run
Meetin’ a woman from a foreign country would be a lot of fun
I did not stop to knock the door just ran right on inside
Yelling out to Charlie, where’s that new mail order bride?
I looked all around the room not a woman was in sight
Then I thought, ol Charlie’s pullin’ my leg again all right
Charlie just made all this story up, like a dog he lied
He ain’t never seen the likes of a new mail order bride!
Out of the back room came Charlie dragging a crate
Charlie I need to see this woman, it’s getting’ kinda late
Just help me with this crate and soon she’ll be at our side
You’ll be the first to meet my new mail order bride
Well I was grinning’ from ear to ear like a mule eatin’ briars
We attacked that crate with hammers till it bonds had expired
Charlie reached in the box and move the straw around inside
And layin’ there in the raw was Charlie’s new mail order bride
Gee, Charlie I says, I thought she was foreign, new to the scene
Charlie laughed and said hell no, I got her from New Orlean
Well she sure is a pretty thang with that hair in a pony tail tied
She’s a damn fine lookin’ woman, your new mail order bride
Charlie said hurry, let’s get her out, there’s no need to dally
I think I have a name for her, my little round-mouthed Sally
I gonna buy her a bra to match those red panties he cried
She’ll be the prettiest thang around, my new mail order bride
Look at them fine tata’s CC, you can tell she’s from the south
Oh my God! There’s nothing’ finer, look at that pretty mouth!
She’s built for speed, comfort, and I bet she’s a fun ride
I got to come back over and try your new mail order bride!
Well, Charlie said that he’d think about; right now he couldn’t say
He just wanted to pump some air into her and get ready to play
So he said you run along, get back to where it is you hide
Don’t you see I need to be alone with my new mail order bride?
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