ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Christmas Crumbs and Chocolate Fancies - Short Story

Updated on December 19, 2016
Nell Rose profile image

Nell is a trained Psychologist and lives in London England. She has been interested in Astronomy since a child.

Living in a 1950's dreamworld!
Living in a 1950's dreamworld!

When Gillian decided to cook dinner for 14 people, it never crossed her mind that the day wouldn't be quite what she envisioned.

For starters, her best friend Julie decided that actually it would be a great idea to bring her three kids, two dogs and one irate husband with her.

The husband she could cope with, but Gillian wasn't quite, well lets just say, partial to children! Oh she didn't mind looking after one at a time, but for some reason the blueprint for motherhood had passed her by. Okay, lets face it, she hated kids!

'Ah well' she thought blowing her hair off her face, and wiping her forehead with her right arm while stirring the thick cream blob in the bowl, 'Its only one day. What can possibly go wrong?'

1950's woman on telephone
1950's woman on telephone

Oh yes! the dogs! Where the heck was she going to put them? They were yappy little things at the best of times. Unless she shut them in the study. Yes! great idea! Just as long as they didn't pee on her husbands best Moroccan rug. Never mind we will come to that when it happens. Okay, what next?

Gillian had loved cooking ever since she left school. She had spent three years at culinary college, and came away with an endless supply of cookbooks, loads of ideas, and a brand new husband to try them out on.

She had met Peter just after leaving college and setting up in London. After a short dating life, and even shorter engagement they had settled in quite nicely in Peter's flat in Chelsea. With both of them working, and with the sale of her Flat they had enough money for the rent most months and a bit left over for goodies as she liked to call her new cookery ideas. In fact Gillian was a bit of a 1950's wannabe.

She loved all the old pictures of 'Good wives' looking after their husbands, and cooking 'amazing' food. Heck, she even dressed like 'I love Lucy' the popular TV program, and hated anything to disrupt her fantasy.

And woe betide anyone, and I mean anyone, getting in the way of her baking!

I Love Lucy!

Gillian loves I Love Lucy!
Gillian loves I Love Lucy! | Source

Of course her husband loved her recipes. In fact she couldn't remember him ever disliking anything she had made in the kitchen. His favorite of all though were her Chocolate fancies.

Whipped cream mixed with coco a touch of cinnamon, and the secret ingredient passed down from her mother. Dark and light chocolate mixed with brown sugar. Heat it all up then leave for ten minutes.

Then taking the bowl from the table she began to laddle the mixture into the mini cake tins, and place them in the fridge to set. There! all done. Ready for her guests.

Leaving the kitchen she walked back into the dining room and observed her handy work. Chicken, nibbles, cakes and lots of wine.

'That should do it' she smiled and slowly walked up the stairs to get changed.

Chocolate Fancies Yum!
Chocolate Fancies Yum!

So far the evening was going well. The two dogs were behaving, the children were too, sort of, and Julie..where was Julie? had helped her plan the whole thing.

'This is marvelous Gillian, how do you do it?' Betty leaned over the canapes, her cleavage nearly causing a disaster with the souffle. Gillian swiftly saved the souffle, shrugged and said ,

'Oh you know, I just love cooking. Peter's a darling, he always likes to taste the stuff I make, its a wonder he isn't as fat as a cow'. Grimacing, Betty laughed. 'He is as thin as a rake, what's his secret? lots of exercise, or er...too much sex maybe?' She burst out laughing and walked back to her seat, grabbing another cake as she went.

Dinner party
Dinner party

'What a strange thing to say'! Gillian stopped what she was doing and stared at Betty's back. 'Why would she say that?' thinking about it, Gillian realised that actually it must be exercise that kept Peter thin, because she couldn't remember the last time they had made love.

Was it last week? A month? She startled. No! it was nearly three months ago! They had both been so busy, and...'

Well it was rather difficult trying to get Peter to act like a good 1950's guy too. In his words its rather stupid isn't it sweetie?!

'Darling! have you any more Canapes? Your food is delicious!' Tom, Sara's husband, who always sounded as though he was about to go on stage, called across the room.

As the evening progressed, Gillian was soon caught up in the praise from her guests, and totally forgot about what Betty had said. Time ticked on, and it was soon time to ease the guests out of the house with as least amount of fuss as possible.

Julie's husband had left a while ago with the children, but had left the two dogs for his wife to take home. So far they had behaved themselves and not turned into a yappy horrible nightmare!

Suddenly there was an almighty crash! it sounded like it had come from the kitchen!

Dachshunds dogs misbehaving!
Dachshunds dogs misbehaving!

Entering the kitchen the first thing Gillian saw was the remains of the Christmas cake splayed across the floor. The two dachshunds had escaped and were relishing the free gift of food. Wagging their tails ecstatically while licking crumbs of their snouts.

'Oh hell, how on earth did this happen? Bad dogs, no, no leave it alone, oh don't then...!' Reaching under the table for the dust pan and brush she suddenly saw movement in the study which sat directly across from the kitchen.

'Hello? anybody in there? And what clever person let the damn dogs out? They are eating my cake!'

'Hello? Oh damn and blast and fiddlesticks, are they deaf?' Gillian stomped across to the study, ready to give someone a good telling off. But as she slammed open the door the sight that greeted her choked the words in her throat and all that came out was ..


There on the new Moroccan mat, splayed out in all her full glory was Julie, naked as the day she was born, covered in Gillian's chocolate fancies! And Peter caught like a rabbit in the glare, could only stutter....

'But Chocolates are gorgeous I always love your chocolate fancies? Gillian? Gillian? What are you going to do...? Arghhhhh............!

All the neighbors could hear at 11 pm at night, in a quiet neighborhood was a muffled scream, followed by a loud bang. Then quiet.

Peter was never the same again. Nobody knows exactly what Gillian threatened him with, but from then on Peter came home like a dutiful husband every night, sat and read the paper and quietly went to bed.

Julie on the other hand, was spotted staggering down the middle of the road at 3 am covered in Christmas cake and an assortment of canapes and vol-au-vents filled with chicken and asparagus. Her favorite if Gillian remembered, as she hissed under her breath while wiping the floor clean. There that's better!

Standing up she checked the floor, gave one more wipe and then sashayed across the room till she was standing in front of the mirror. Leaning forward she touched her lips with her fingers, wiping away ...tomato sauce...? And then reapplying her lipstick.

Standing back she gave a sigh, pulled at her dress to straighten it and headed up the stairs.

'I must bake some more Chocolate Fancies tomorrow, such a waste....such...a....waste'.!

Caught having an affair!
Caught having an affair!
Chocolate Fancies and husband!
Chocolate Fancies and husband!

The moral of the story is:

You can mess with my man but you will never mess with my Chocolate Fancies!

You got what you deserved!

Credits- Make your own cartoons from photographs

And - for creating speech bubbles.

© 2016 Nell Rose


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)