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Dirty 'Lil Charlie

Updated on January 27, 2016
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(oxigenial.com)

By: Wayne Brown

(Writer's Note: I wrote this one to celebrate my poet pal, Charlie "CC Ryder" Campbell (a.k.a. ralwus). I sure hope he likes it a lot. Maybe this one will butter his biscuits)

 

 

He’s got a lot of women but really wants a Harley

He’s writes of lust and sexual innuendo

That dirty lil’Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and squeeze his jalapeno!

 

 

There’s a purple lizard livin’ in his ‘parley’

He gets him out and plays with him

That dirty lil’ Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and twist his lil’ slim!

 

 

His pomes walk the edge and just pass the rules hardly

He hides the words and uses twisted tools

That dirty lil’ Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and snip his lil’jewels!

 

 

He makes the girls giggle and all the women hotty

Teasing ‘em with sniffs and swirls

That dirty lil’ Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and string his lil’ pearls!

 

 

He likes his honey on biscuits, baked up big and hardy

Wants his women walkin’ on buttered leg

That dirty lil’ Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and stomp his lil’ peg!

 

 

He’s sex on a bulldozer, a hot ‘n sweaty little party

Has all his hot women behind doors shut

That dirty lil’ Charlie

They’ll catch him soon and kick his lil’ butt!

 

 

© Copyright WBrown2010. All Rights Reserved

 

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    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      Hahaha you rat.

    • rkhyclak profile image

      rkhyclak 7 years ago from Ohio

      hahhahahaha I laughed out loud at this :) Nice job, Wayne, rated up for the comedic factor!

    • lalesu profile image

      lalesu 7 years ago from south of the Mason-Dixon

      Bah! Hahaha! You're too funny, Wayne Brown! Charlie deserved this...of course, he's eating it up, as he should be, it's right up his alley. You two are something else. HubPages just wouldn't be the same without you! Now pass that Brandy!

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      He is goading me into doing one on him, maybe I will. I have one about a lil' midget that will fit. LOL

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      a cowgirl midget.

    • samboiam profile image

      samboiam 7 years ago from Texas

      What a fitting tribute to one of the more colorful characters on HP.

    • saddlerider1 profile image

      saddlerider1 7 years ago

      The Ode to Dirty Little Charlie, How fitting, he must be blushing and his lizard to:0) Wayne you are in trouble pard, he is going to get you back of course in a nice way. lol.

    • saddlerider1 profile image

      saddlerider1 7 years ago

      Charlie of course I meant this all in a nice gesture, you are certainly one of our favorite colorful hubbers on here and the gals love ya to:0) keep hubbin

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      Hello everyone! and welcome to the Dirty Lil' Charlie Party. I think I have to far now and it is likely I will be having sex with a midget soon! But what the hell, I'vee probably earned and I will have a place to set my brandy while it is going on! Why is I feel like I might get kicked in the Rockies? Sorry, Charlie! WB

    • Ivorwen profile image

      Ivorwen 7 years ago from Hither and Yonder

      What a perfect tribute to Charlie! :)

    • AEvans profile image

      Julianna 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      lolololo :D Dirty Lil' Charlie , he sure does have a many and we love him dearly! It was perfect Wayne absolutely perfect and you are a fantastic poet, what a gift and what a laugh! :)

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      Oh Charlie...please make it rhyme! I have a hell of time when it doesn't rhyme! You know....I know a cowboy who is a bit of an idjet, got caught in the backseat riding a cowgirl midget....like that!

    • rkhyclak profile image

      rkhyclak 7 years ago from Ohio

      bahaha Wayne, your last comment killed me! I can't wait for Charlie's tribute to you, especially if it has that line :-P You guys are great!

    • billyaustindillon profile image

      billyaustindillon 7 years ago

      Wayne great stuff - dueling poetry - now this should be good. Just like a ring of fire...

    • lalesu profile image

      lalesu 7 years ago from south of the Mason-Dixon

      OH! MY! FREAKIN! HELL! LMAO!! I'm trying to recover from your own bit of rhyme about Charlie's cowgirl midget so I can type this...Charlie's gonna have to be on his toes to top you, I'm afraid!

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      Someone say toes? Midget toes? Right up Wayne's nose with midget toes. roflmao here BTW Wayne, I am 200 lbs little.

    • lalesu profile image

      lalesu 7 years ago from south of the Mason-Dixon

      OMG!!! I don't think I have enough Brandy for this, LMAO! But y'all keep it rollin', boys, I'll make do with somehow.

    • lalesu profile image

      lalesu 7 years ago from south of the Mason-Dixon

      "...with somehow?" Sounds like I've already made do, haha!...It happens.

    • Tom Whitworth profile image

      Tom Whitworth 7 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Wayne,

      I don't know much about you or Charlie but if he's anything like my old friends I'm sure you know payback's a bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 7 years ago

      Wayne,

      Honestly, I think you have to set this poem to music.

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      @everybody above!....I see you all stayed up last night and had a party to the rock n roll sounds of "Dirty Lil Charlie. But I was sleeping in bed with visions of cowgirl midgets dancing in my head. But with the sunrise and the sky azure blue. Ol' Charlie already working on creating my just due. I hope when you read it you won't be floored cause I'm pretty sure I'm gonna get gored! (I never thought that one little poem could create so much flurry and subjects...midgets, cowgirls, brandy, armpits, toes...where will stop...Don't answer that CC!)

    • valeriebelew profile image

      valeriebelew 7 years ago from Metro Atlanta, GA, USA

      Hey Wayne, I've seen you on Charlie's site, and even casted some smart a-s remarks your way. Have never visited your site, or read any of your hubs, but one of my fans wrote a hub about people who had supported her sister's writing, and you were on her list. I decided to come check out your writing, so here I am. I, of course, am a fan of Charlie's too. He is funny, base, and writes exactly what he is thinking at the time. He is not restrained by appropriateness or what people think, and that is a positive in my book, because that is sometimes threatening and hard to do. Now, I shall read some of your others. This one caught my eye first. (:v

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      Hey, Valerie, don't worry about "smart-ass", as I remember it I was "smart-assing" Charlie at the time. Actually, I am starting to catch the attention of some of the loons but I deserve with my political writing. Today, for example, I have already been called an alarmist, "Chicken Little" and I am sure it will get worse (see "Shadow of Marx"). It might have bothered me if they guy doing it could write a reasonable sentence when he leaves a comment. Just some dumbass runnin' his mouth who is too short on ability to write a hub himself. I had another guy actually refer to me as a "lazy writer" because I answered a question about writer block by telling the person to step outside their genre or comfort zone to gain some mental stimulation. He cited all these learned class-room techniques and general bullshit that he had picked up out of some book. I checked his site...2 hubs and 3 fans. I love the hub but gosh when the show up stupid they show up really stupid! Thanks for your kind words, hope to see you again soon. BTW...there are two more poems on here dedicated to Charlie ("ralwus writing" and "Charlie, You Bastard" plus there are a couple that we co-wrote and posted on my site...check them out!) WB

    • ladyjane1 profile image

      ladyjane1 7 years ago from Texas

      How funny Im not too familiar with ralwus but Ill have to get to know him.

      "He’s sex on a bulldozer, a hot ‘n sweaty little party"

      I do believe Im getting the vapors. LOL Cheers.

    • tonymac04 profile image

      Tony McGregor 7 years ago from South Africa

      Hey there - Charlie is my main man! I love his work and I'm delighted as all get out that you have chosen to honour him thusly! Though I think he'll kick your ass sometime soon!

      Love and peace

      Tony

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      @ladyjane1...LJ, Charlie will charm your sox off. There are a couple more poems I have that are dedicated to him. My first was "ralwus writings" and I also did "Charlie, You Bastard"...both are fun and may give some insight prior to visiting him. He will still the vapors! WB

      @Tonymac04....Yes, Tony, Charlie is one of my all time favorites as well. That's why I kid him so much. And you are right. He is very talented and will have a field-day kicking my ass I am sure. But, if I gotta get kicked I sure don't mind the honor of getting it from CC! Thanks much for the read and the visit! WB

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      'tis done Wayne Brown and waiting your pleasure. Tu Pomes and I do hope all the above give it a go. hehe Been a pleasure. I was offline all day yesterday, no phone, no internet but it worked out for the best for the one I had in store is not so good as this one. haha

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      @ralwus...headed that way right now, Charlie! WB

    • profile image

      Pachuca213 7 years ago

      You hit that nail right on the head with this one...thats our Charlie alright! loved it to pieces!

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 7 years ago from Texas

      @Pachuca213...Yes, if you follow Charlie, you can sure find him in there. Check out his site, he nailed me good with one of his! WB

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      Wayne, it is time for a new picture my friend. Every time I see that chin with the hole in it like a 44 I fear it will go off. Point it at someone else please.

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