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Daddy...

Updated on January 27, 2013

Why this Haiku? U ask...

Though he had been around in the beginning of my life, I only remember seeing my Father 2 times in my life. He lived in Tennessee, and I lived in Michigan with my mom and younger Brother who is also his Son. When I was 4 years old, he came to our front door and asked my mother if he could take me with him. I instantly knew who he was...I knew that I was a Part of him, and I felt the Love that was emanating from him to me, and I knew that he would never allow anything bad to happen to me. He was asking my Mother if I could go with him, I'm not sure where...but he told me to go and get my shoes.

Excited, I ran to my room as fast as I could while he stood just inside the door conversing with my mom. I hurried back with my shoes in hand, excited to go with my Daddy. I said "I have my shoes Daddy!"... apparently, my Mom, seeing the car full of friends he had with him, had told him that he couldn't take me, because he bent down until he was eye level with me...looked me straight in the eyes...his eyes were like mine, and I could see straight into his soul...he said "Your shoes are beautiful baby...I Love U"... he rose to his feet, took a last glance at my mother and walked back to the car in which he had arrived. My heart was broken. I watched the car until it was no longer within range of sight. . . I was 4 years old.

Whenever life was extremely difficult for me, when I felt unwanted or unloved, I would refer to this memory, and it got me through a lot of dark times...

Mama always said Papa was a 'rolling stone'. He had a wife and a life elsewhere with other children who had the privilege of having him in their life...and my Brother and I missed out. Such is life...

I saw him again briefly when I was nine, but the memory when I was four is the one that meant the most because on that day there was no doubt in my mind that my Daddy loved me. Had he gotten to know me, he would've been one of the few people in my world who would've understood me, for he and I shared the same heart. All my life I longed for him. I still do...

Although I did get to speak with him a few times in my adult years, My father passed before we were ever able to establish a real relationship. So that same memory will have to carry me on through the rest of my days here.

I hope and pray that when I get to heaven, nothing will prevent us from picking up where we left off. Regardless of the reason why he was not a more active part of my life, I love my Daddy without cost or condition. And I never for one second doubted that he loved me.




\


Some Memories...Due to their Signifigance... Remain Indelibly Printed on the Brain



He came 2 drop off the portion of his heart that rightfully belongs to me...




Holding it tightly within my hand... I watched his car until I couldn't...




Daddy...










Copyright © 2013 Mcway, T.

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    • LisaMarie724 profile image

      Lisa Stover 4 years ago from Pittsburgh PA

      Such a beautiful and sad story, thankfully you have that great memory of him to hold you over until you meet him again when this life is finished.

    • Patriot Quest profile image

      Wayne Joel Bushong 4 years ago from America

      I met my father when I was 21, I think its nice that you believe in him but the truth is he is as horrible as my father is. Any father who abandons their children doesn't rate well with me. I have a text or email relationship with my father now, haven't seen him face to face in 15 years. My mother married a great guy that I call Dad, other than that I don't need my biological father...........and it seems he didn't need me.......

    • TheLady111 profile image
      Author

      TheLady111 4 years ago from The Vortex

      I understand your position. But there are plenty of 'normal' fathers that are just as horrible. My best friend's father was wealthy, gave her everything, and was there every day of her life...He also molested her from age 3 until she left home for college, so I do not complain about my plight. It is painful, yes, but blaming, judging, and witholding love only causes more pain. I know my Father loved me. I choose not to speculate on why he chose the path he chose, but I imagine feelings of inadequacy, and defeat kept him away moreso than the fact that I meant nothing to him. I know in my heart that that is simply not true. I love him without cost or condition, simply because it feels right to my heart. I will not attempt to advise U on your situation, for we are each entitled to our own experience. Thank U for commenting.

      Peace & Blessings

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      Sad but also so beautiful !!

      How heartening that you have kept a place for him in your heart.

      I loved this one and vote up,across and share all around .

      Eddy.

    • LadyFiddler profile image

      Joanna Chandler 4 years ago from On planet Earth

      This is a wonderful story i enjoyed it it's good to still love someone after they haven't been around. Well my father is around he was never a good good father but he still hung around and did what ever he could have. Sad to say about 14 years ago he picked up a young girl and since then everything has seem to changed, she controls him, she hates my sisters and myself and try to ruin the little relationship we had with our father.

      All he cares about is her, her filthy lies etc, now they are married so i guess he'll fall under her spell more he is doomed till death and i am happy for him i know he'll learn the hard way, because just yesterday january 22nd I've closed the door on him. If you love a woman more than your children then go right ahead..................

      I have NO father save the one in heaven. A REAL man don't act like a cece or do as he do.

      Thanks for sharing

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      i'm sorry, but - i am sobbing...tears are running down my cheeks!

      i am deeply touched..

      While you and i have much in common as far as not having a father - at least you KNOW yours loved you! Mine is still alive...

      I recently wrote a poem called 'daddy dearest'...

      Feel free, but - no pressure, dear!

      i am bookmarking this, giving it a place of honor on my fb page - and sharing it forward - it is beautiful..

    • pagesvoice profile image

      Dennis L. Page 4 years ago from New York/Pennsylvania border

      Thank you for sharing such a deep emotional piece with the rest of us. Wow was my first reaction. Sadness, filled with a void of feeling that special relationship between child and parent was my second reaction. Too many people take for granted that everyone has a "Leave it to Beaver" childhood and yet, sadly that is not the case. Although your dad wasn't present in your life, the fact that you felt his love and more importantly that you loved him, is all that matters. I'll end with one word...wow!

    • Nakia Deon profile image

      Nakia Deon 4 years ago

      I wish I had a memory of my father. I see we have a great deal in common. Similar childhoods, similar gifts with the written word. I wonder if we should be thankful for childhood pain? Would we be so creative without it?

    • TheLady111 profile image
      Author

      TheLady111 4 years ago from The Vortex

      Yes Ma'am...I sensed the Kindred spirit the first time I read your work. glad U are enjoying mine. Thank U for reading!

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Memories will always be with you to hold onto but to actually have your dad with you is so important for any child, thanks for sharing your experiences.

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