ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Darwin Awards

Updated on October 15, 2012

A "Vintage" Darwin Story

This story is "UNCONFIRMED" (it's just circulated as a conversational tidbit) by Darwin - 1982 Darwin Award winner--

Cactus Crunch:

February 1982, Arizona...

The state of Arizona finally had to declare the sport of cactus shooting as a FELONY. Apparently, desert marksmen aim fire onto Saguaro "cacti" so frequently that Arizona had to re-classify the sport in order to try and dissuade marksmen from taking shots at the cacti. (Guns are dangerous to all forms of life, and not just cactus plants).

The new law didn't stop marksman, like David - a 27 year old, considered a sharp-shooter. Now, David tried to impress some friends in '82 with his sharp-shooting, and opened fire on a Saguaro.

The decision and action killed David!

No, he didn't have equipment problems...his gun didn't misfire...

...his shots were bang-on, so-to-speak.

David was killed when the cactus fell on him.

Apparently, he fired two shots at a 27-foot cactus. The bullets hit their mark, but David was only able to utter the first syllable of, "Tim-ber!" before a 23-foot chunk of Saguaro fell on him and crunched him underneath its sharp, prickly skin.

* This story confirmed by someone who called in to a Rochester, New York radio station by the name of Radio-Free Wease. The caller claimed that the incident happened "years ago" back in '82 when he lived in Arizona.....blah blah blah

Darwin Award Nominee - Checking fuel tank using lighter

Arkansas 1996: Frog Giggin' Accident

This story unconfirmed by Darwin...

Won 1998 Darwin Award

Frog Giggin Accident In Arkansas, 1996: A pair of locals were seriously injured early Monday morning. The two men were driving on state highway 38 near Cotton Patch when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree. Deputy Dovey Snider of Woodruff County confirmed details and reported on the incident shortly after midnight on Monday.

Billy Ray Wallis, aged 38, of Little Rock, along with 33 year old Des Arc resident, Thurston Poole are listed in serious condition at Baptist Medical Centre.

Apparently, the accident happened after a frog giggin trip and as the men were returning to Des Arc.

 

Not quite Darwin... let's say "Stupidity Awards," okay?

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      There are some Darwinesque moments from IFOs too (idiots from Ohio). IFFs (idiots from Florida), etc. Thanks for funny stuff!

    • mythbuster profile imageAUTHOR

      mythbuster 

      8 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

      I'm glad you're not reading so much garbage horror stuff before bedtimes anymore, Beth100 - that stuff will give you the nightmares. Honestly, I dont know why people write that stuff lol

      :) Okay - well I know why, but it's NOT so people read it just before bedtime and give themselves nightmares. Ya gotta read that stuff during daylight hours... or and up on Darwin Awards and funny hubs just prior to bedtime.

    • Beth100 profile image

      Beth100 

      8 years ago from Canada

      The Darwin Awards - the best laugh around! Talking about FAIL in neon lights! Thanks for the chuckles (much better than the nightmares from Final Girl "Beth" last night)! lol

    • mythbuster profile imageAUTHOR

      mythbuster 

      8 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

      Hey Jule Romans - thx for the comments. I'm glad your husband will read and enjoy the Darwin Awards (can we call it 'literature'? lol) "stuff." There are some real jaw-drop stories out there. I've been hearing the cactus story for over a decade and usually people come to me, saying, "Omigosh I just found out something awful about cactuses - I needed to come and warn you about..."

      Sometimes I let them tell the whole legend, but occassionally, I answer, "warn me about spiders in cactus plants?" The latter is sort of deflating for others, so usually I listen and take notes - in case the 'legend' has changed lol

    • Jule Romans profile image

      Jule Romans 

      8 years ago from United States

      I enjoy the Darwin awards. Cactus death- very funny. The way you built up to it was good, too.

      My husband, who hates to read, loves his Darwin awards book.

    • mythbuster profile imageAUTHOR

      mythbuster 

      8 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

      Hi habee - glad you liked the silly stories. If you want to really kill a half a day, visit the Darwin Awards site! Make sure you're not supposed to be doing something that day tho' lol

    • habee profile image

      Holle Abee 

      8 years ago from Georgia

      These are great!

    • mythbuster profile imageAUTHOR

      mythbuster 

      8 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

      Thanks Chris - Merry Christmas to you to - no frog giggin' on this merry day, eh?

    • chrismarva profile image

      chrismarva 

      8 years ago

      We’ve all done some dumb shit, but most of us know when to get out of the way. Great hub. Merry Christmas.... Chris

    • mythbuster profile imageAUTHOR

      mythbuster 

      8 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

      dahoglund, when prompt service is not forthcoming at a burger joint and one is extremely hungry - is this not an emergency situation or what?

      Enelle Lamb - "Frog Giggin" is frog hunting!

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frog_gigging#Frog_gig...

    • Enelle Lamb profile image

      Enelle Lamb 

      8 years ago from Canada's 'California'

      Ok - you got me - what exactly is a "frog gigging" trip?

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 

      8 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      darwin awards have a certain fascination. The same thing is reflected in people who call 911 for such things as not liking the service at a hamburger shop.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)