ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Days of Despair Parts 1 & 2

Updated on October 24, 2018

Part 1

Why must there

Be days like this

Just deep dark sorrow

Instead of bliss?

Into the bottomless

Pit do I fall

Alone and scared

And oh so small.

No one to love

And no one to care

The weight of the world

Alone I must bear.

There is no laughter,

Only fear

And there is not

One single person near.

There is no one

To share the pain

And I always lose

I never gain.

Life has lost

Of all its reason

No matter the day,

The month, or the season

No one can love

A person like me

If they had a choice

They’d rather I not be.

All I have

Is heartache and despair

Why would anyone

Want to go there?

Sometimes I wish

I had the balls

To say the hell with it

And end it all.

But then I would cause

Others the despair

That I feel inside

Even when others are there.

So that’s why I ask

Are my remaining days

Just deep dark sorrow

Instead of bliss?

When all I have

Is heartache and despair

And why would anyone

Want to go there?

The changes lie within the eyes

Me starting a new life
Me starting a new life
Me two years and a near fatal auto accident later.
Me two years and a near fatal auto accident later.
Me again and a yr or so later. I've finally accepted that things will not ever be the same.
Me again and a yr or so later. I've finally accepted that things will not ever be the same.

Part 2

Just when I begin to feel

That things are getting better

The thoughts come round again and

Days of Despair are there still.

Loneliness washes over me

Even though I am surrounded by

Loved ones each and every day but yet

Days of despair just won’t let me be.

Sadness that just don’t go away

Fills my heart and mind a lot and

Wishing them away do not work so

Days of despair just linger or stay.

While I have everything I need

As well as some of the things I want

There comes a moment in the space of time

Days of despair—my soul does bleed.

Will this cycle ever stop?

It’s almost always the same

A circle going round and round so

Days of despair—up they do pop.

Sometimes I really do wake

With happiness all around

But it doesn’t last long as

Days of despair do a reality check.

I lost my sanity over twenty years ago

And I don’t mean my mind of life’s survival

All beliefs I once held so very dear

Days of despair came and away they did blow.

Learning then that there’s no happy ending

Only eventual pain, hurt, and deceit

So I’ve waded through life for twenty years with

Days of despair being so condescending.

Respite, at times, has come and gone

Good times and memories I do have

The price of which I’ve always been glad to pay but

Days of despair, then and now, make me feel so alone.

© 2012 Ashel Ladyhawke


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • girishpuri profile image

      Girish puri 

      5 years ago from NCR , INDIA

      Accept the life as it comes to you, touching hub, voted up.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)