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Dear Katie

Updated on July 10, 2010

so first off I guess I have to apologize....I kind of stared at you like an Edward Cullun wannabe....I know...creepy, you already judged me so it doesn't matter.

Next to apologize for: I did cheat.....Cause I was the one to get your heart instead of all the other guys even though the odds were greatly against me...remember how you thought I was ugly and all four years ago. Yeah I had my work cut out for me haha...You know, you were really a hard girl to get. You didn't let me get you too easily. You had me awake for hours almost every night leaving me think of ways to win your heart.

Anyway....I'm still awake as you can tell...I think the room is spinning...no no wait....that's just me!! =/

Sometimes I kind of do wish I get a do over to win you all over again...Not because the excitement of the challenge or that I'm bored or anything...noooo that's not the reason.

The reason is because, knowing what I know now, what would I have done differently to make you fall in love with me. I was so young back then, and you were really the first girl I ever had to "Try" for. I think I did somethings wrong...even though in the end we still end somewhat happily ever after.

I'm listening to all time low, and it reminds me of the summer when you were in jax living with your sister and I'd come to visit and pick you up on the weekends and all. I think that is when our love really started to take root. Us messing around in your sisters house (oh she would hate me all over again if she found out) and just being able to spend the summer weekends driving on I-95 with just my verizon phone and the anticipation of picking you up. The pictures of the sky I would take on the way, and me showing them to you. "The Beauty of Nature" lol remember that?? Good times.

We definitely have changed since then. But I still love you just as much, no...Way more. Remember the concerts we'd go to? lol We saw all time low twice together...I guess that's "Our Band" Since they are the only ones we have really seen.

I remember the night we took my sister to see them in Orlando...The scare of your UTI, and you telling me more about who you are. That's when I learned you drank. It was such a culture shock to me when I heard that hahahah. You definitely have made me break out of my comfort zone with things. I guess my upsetment always stemmed from me thinking too much...I'd have thoughts of you with a bunch of people, maybe a few you were attracted to. You drinking a little too much and then just forgetting about me and making bad decisions with other guys.

But you have to remember, This was a while ago, while I was still learning who you are...If I could go back, I wouldn't worry about it so much I was very young four years ago.

I can remember being at the fountain before I left school, and just thinking about you so much. Listening to my ipod and music that made me day dream in the night.

I don't want you to read this in the morning time, even though you will....you will be getting ready for work, and I don't think you'd really stop to think just what I'm trying to tell you...not verbally....emotionally.

So pinky promise me that you will save the message and re read it again at night....so you know the emotion and feeling I'm trying to say...I'm just reminiscing our first year of actually giving a go at us.

I don't regret a single thing we did back then. All the time we spent together are just priceless memories to me. I wouldn't trade those memories for the world. One day we will be sooo old and we will have kids and Grand kids and no longer will life seem to be about us. We will be so involved with others that we forget about our own story..

Katie...I don't want us to forget about our story and the things we have done or the feelings we use to feel with each other. I don't want to stop making priceless memories either, but I will admit it is harder because of the life we have right now...It's not like you live with Shannon and I drive to see you...I'm looking at you right now with watery eyes...you're on the bed sleeping, and I'm on the floor reminiscing.

I think it is more important now than ever to spend time just each other and no one else...we need to just be young and spontaneous while we have it. We need to make the memories that songs are written about. I love you this much, and don't you forget that. You will always be my "girly" You were the first. and you will definitely be the last.

lol I just had a funny memory...after the 50's themed fall fest at trinity...when we all went out, and then we went to jenny's house where you were staying...I remember thinking, "I like this girl more than I should...I want to spend the whole night with her" Those were magical nights to me.

Yeah that whole spark is gone, the spark you have when you first start liking someone...thinking about them all the time, and just wanting to spend all the time in the world with them just because they are new and you feel like there's nothing more important in the world...but I still have those magical feelings with you all the time...

It makes me so sad thinking right now that we are so stressed about money and life....it shouldn't be like that...We should be with each other just like we were back in 07-08 those were great years for me, years that defined my life, and years that I will never ever ever forget about.

I love you.

Comments

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    • GrapesR4Novelists profile image

      GrapesR4Novelists 

      7 years ago from Poverty

      I've got to be honest, when I first started reading this I wanted to vom, like a lot, but by the end I actually shed a tear. kudos.

    • tjhooper profile imageAUTHOR

      TJ Hooper 

      8 years ago from dublin Ga

      lol no intrusion. I made it public and I allowed comments.

    • Jane Bovary profile image

      Jane Bovary 

      8 years ago from The Fatal Shore

      I feel almost like I'm intruding on something here by making a comment,...just wanted to say, I think that is a really lovely letter.

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