E.G.G Episode 64: Shadow
AND THERE CAME A DAY, A DAY UNLIKE ANY OTHER. A DAY WHERE THREE FRIENDS HAD DEALT WITH THE IMPENDING DANGER AT THEIR DOORSTEP, AND FINALLY HAD THE TIME TO DO WHAT THEY DO BEST. ON THAT DAY, E.G.G STARTED OVER.
Previously, on E.G.G...
Josh was recruited for a top secret Level 7 mission by the long thought dead agent Phil Coulson of S.H.I.E.L.D. Investigating a seemingly evil Nick Fury, the duo find out that he is actually being controlled by Loki, God of Mischief. They beat him, while picking up that Dr. Doom putting together a secret group...
Click here to read E.G.G Episode 63: #CoulsonLives
“Come on! Come on!” Josh said excitedly as he, Eileen, Acacia, and Kyle went for the teleporter.
“Calm down Josh.” Eileen said. “Geez, Acacia’s usually the one excited about testing weapons.”
“It’s no fun unless it’s in the Feeding Pen.” Acacia replied.
“Yeah, well,” Josh replied. “A: Blowing stuff up in base is ten times more dangerous now that we’re in space. And B: Do you even know where we’re going?”
“A decommissioned nuclear power plant.” Eileen answered.
“Then why the shell are we moving so slow! Let’s go!” Acacia exclaimed, pushing ahead of Josh.
“Her willingness to destroy things makes me uneasy.” Kyle remarked.
“Yeah, well I made your mom uneasy last night!” Josh taunted. “Heyo!”
“You aren’t nearly as funny as you think you are.” Kyle replied.
“Keep telling yourself that.” Josh said. “Why are you even coming with us?”
“You three plus a nuclear power plant equals World War three.” Kyle replied.
“Okay, I chose this location with Acacia’s destructive tendencies in mind, so that won’t happen. And it’s decommissioned anyways!”
“I’ve seen you do more with less.” They got to the teleporter where Acacia was waiting impatiently.
“Come on, come on, move it!” She complained.
“Alright, alright.” Josh said. He turned to Agent Brand.
“Yo Abs, can you beam us down?”
“Sure.” She said, typing into the computer. In a few seconds and a blue flash of light, the four of them appeared the top of a cooling tower. Josh looked down the center.
“Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!” His voice echoed as he shouted into it.
“Stop.” Kyle said.
“You can at least try to pull the stick out of your butt!” Josh replied.
“Ahem.” They all turned to see Squirrel Girl standing in front of them in a S.H.I.E.L.D uniform. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to get started.”
“Who are you?” Josh asked.
“My name is Agent Green, codename Squirrel Girl. I’ll be overseeing your weapons demonstration.”
“Right…” Josh replied.
“Hey Dory.” Kyle said.
“Hi Ky- or, daddy!” She exclaimed. Josh looked at him.
“Daddy? Ha, last I remember Sabrina never…” Kyle gently put his hand on Josh’s shoulder.
“Chose your next words very wisely.” He said.
“I… uh… I…” Josh cleared his throat and put his hands in his pocket.
“So,” Squirrel Girl said, approaching Eileen with her hands behind her back. “What do we have here Director Waterloo?”
“It… It’s Wuthrich…” Eileen replied.
“I like Waterloo better! It sounds funnier.”
“… Okay, well, this is just little something we whipped up for our phase 3 lineup.” Eileen lifted a large metal gun with a glowing blue circle in the center and energy coursing through it.
“We call it the Midsummer Night.” Acacia said.
“You see,” Eileen began. “The energy is based on the concussive blast power put out by Havok, there’s a reserve as cosmic energy stored in the…”
“Yeah, yeah, I don’t care, just show me what it does!” Squirrel Girl exclaimed, hopping excitedly and wagging her tail.
“Okay…” Eileen said. She pulled a lever and charged the gun. It began to hum and glow. She aimed it outward and pulled the trigger. An atom shaped ball of cosmic energy was launched out of the weapon and soared through the sky. It hit a transformer, lit up, then caused a massive explosion. They all shielded their eyes as everything in the area was decimated.
“Wow.” Acacia said.
“Now that’s just the offensive capabilities of it.” Eileen replied. “The practical applications for the Midsummer Night range from…”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever!” Squirrel Girl interrupted. “Just make it go boom again!”
“Something tells me this is gonna be an easy sell.” Josh said to Acacia.
“Alright, brace yourselves.” Eileen said. She shot another blast and blew up an entire bunker.
“Awesome!!!” Squirrel Girl squealed. “Ooh, daddy, can I go see all the exploded stuff?”
“I don’t know…” Kyle said uneasily. “There may be cosmic radioactive fallout…”
“Oh no, there’s none of that.” Acacia said.
“Cause if there were, we’d all be dead right now!” Eileen added.
“Right. Well, I guess it’s okay then.”
“Yippee!” She shouted, leaping onto a power line and scurrying along it.
“Come on Eileen!” Acacia said. “I wanna shoot it from that tower over there!”
“Alright, let’s go.” Eileen said, as they made their way down the ladder. Josh and Kyle stood for a little bit.
“So…” Josh said. “Does Sabrina have a tail, or…”
“Oh for crying out loud, she’s adopted!” Kyle replied.
“Oh. That makes sense now.”
“Idiot.” He grumbled, storming off.
“I heard that!” Josh replied, following him.
“AAAAAHHHHHH!” Squirrel Girl screamed from across the plant. Josh and Kyle quickly turned.
“Was that Agent Green?” Josh asked.
“Dory!” Kyle shouted, running towards her, Josh following him. They approached the destroyed bunker. “Dory! Where are you!” Kyle called. Suddenly Squirrel Girl ran out on all fours and hugged Kyle.
“Daddy it was terrible!” She cried.
“Calm down.” Kyle said, placing his hand on her shoulder. “What did you see?”
“It was a ninja!”
“A ninja?” Josh asked. “You’re sure?”
“Yeah! She was wearing a purple ninja suit and a mask and ninja stars and…”
“We get it.” Kyle interrupted. “You’re sure it was a girl?”
“Yeah! Well, at least she screamed like one when I bit her!”
“Bit her…” Josh said.
“Okay, find safety. We’ll take care of it.” He said. Squirrel Girl nodded and rushed off.
“A ninja? We’re going with that?” Josh asked.
“Are you saying you don’t believe her?” Kyle replied.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. Why would there randomly just be a ninja in an abandoned nuclear power plant?”
“I don’t know, but I’m sure Dory knows what she’s talking about. Now let’s go.” Kyle took out his swords, began to move in, stopped, then turned to see Josh standing there. “Are you coming?”
“Who me? Oh, uh, I was just gonna let you go make sure it was safe first.” Kyle rolled his eyes.
“Idiot.” He said.
“I can hear you!” Josh shouted. Kyle crept into the wreckage. He heard a creaking sound, then quickly turned. “What do you see down there!”
“Quiet!” He called back. He heard another creak. He assumed a fighting stance. “Where are you…” He whispered to himself. Suddenly, in a puff of purple smoke, a female ninja in a purple outfit and mask appeared in front of him.
“Ya!” She shouted, chopping his neck.
“Agh!” Kyle cried, as he fell to the ground. Josh peeked in.
“Rice?” He called. “Kyle… you in there buddy… you okay?” Just then the ninja appeared behind Josh in a flurry of purple smoke. “Aaaahhhh!” Josh screamed as he ran.
“Hiya!” She shouted kicking at him. Josh ducked under her leg, activated the Signal, and continued to run.
“Eileen! Acacia!” He screamed. He looked behind him but didn’t see the ninja. “Where did she…” Josh suddenly saw a shadow on the ground. “Ah!” He shouted, rolling out of the way as she crashed down with her heel. “Guys! Where are you!” He screamed, running away. Then he heard a loud blast. He looked to see another bunker collapse. “They’re still testing the gun! Those jerks don’t even know I’m in trouble!” Just then the ninja appeared in front of him.
“Stand still.” She said, taking out three ninja stars.
“Gyah!” Josh screamed as he turned and ran the other way. “I need some weapons!” She threw the stars, each one barely missing Josh. “Oh, why did I leave my earpiece back at the…” He suddenly spotted something as he passed an office building. “Oh, that’ll do.”
* * *
Up on the other tower, Eileen was reloading the gun while Acacia was scanning the area.
“Ooh, what if we find like, a really old nuclear bomb and blow it up!” Acacia excitedly asked.
“Well, number one, we’d die.” Eileen replied. “And number two, they don’t just leave nuclear bombs lying around like that.”
“You never know…”
“Eileen Wuthrich and Acacia Blanco!” Josh’s voice echoed over the PA system.
“What the…” Acacia asked, as they both stood up.
“If you could please get your heads out of Neverland and COME HELP ME! There’s a ninja here and she… Aaaahhhhh!!!” The PA shut off.
“Josh is in trouble!” Eileen exclaimed, unzipping her uniform. “Cover me.”
“Yeah, sure, uh, you gonna go save the day in your bra?” Acacia asked.
“Wha-” Eileen looked down. “Oh, right.” She zipped her suit back up. “Still getting used to the no powers thing.”
“Maybe it’s time to take the 3.0!” Acacia exclaimed.
“No, it’s not the right time.” Eileen said. Acacia looked at her curiously.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re avoiding it…”
“Josh needs help. Come on.” She said, running down the stairs.
“Right.” Acacia said, following her.
* * *
Josh, meanwhile, was crawling under desks in the office.
“This is insane!” He whispered to himself. “I’m running away from a shelling ninja!” Suddenly the desk he was under was tossed to the side, and the ninja picked him up but the collar. “Oh geez you’re strong!”
“And you’re dead!” She replied, grabbing her sai.
“Drop him!” Eileen shouted, firing her widow stings. The ninja dropped Josh and quickly block each of Eileen shots. She then disappeared in a puff of purple smoke.
“Where did she…” Acacia began when suddenly she reappeared behind and slashed at their heads.
“Whoa!” Eileen screamed, as they jumped back.
“Man we really should’ve brought some weapons!” Acacia complained, as her regulators lit up and she shot fire at the ninja. She swiftly dodged Acacia’s attack and kicked her across the jaw. Acacia rolled back, then slowly stood to her feet with Josh and Eileen.
“Maybe if we started that ninja line I wanted to…” Josh said to Eileen.
“Oh shut up Josh!” She replied. They looked at the ninja.
“What is it you want?” Josh asked.
“Very important people want you three dead.” She replied. “That is all you will know.”
“People like who? Doom? Are you part of his secret group?”
“What?” Eileen asked.
“I’ll explain later.” Josh replied.
“It does not matter.” The ninja replied. “You will not live long enough to find out.” She spun her sais and readied a fighting stance.
“Alright, careful with her guys.” Josh said, as they assumed a defensive stance. “She likes to strike quick and hug the shadows.” The ninja looked down.
“Shadow…” She said to herself.
“Oh shell, you did it again!” Acacia complained.
“What?” Josh asked.
“You gave her a super villain name!”
“Didn’t I tell you it’s a gift!”
“Enough!” Shadow shouted, teleporting in the middle of them.
“Ah!” The all screamed as she spun with her sais, barely missing them. She cut Josh’s arm, then kicked Eileen over a chair. She was about to slice Acacia when Josh sat up.
“Signal, magnetize!” He ordered. The Signal lit up blue and Shadow’s sais flew out of her hands.
“What the-” She asked as Acacia came at her with a punch. Shadow blocked it then reversed Acacia and kicked her over a desk. Acacia rolled and landed on her feet, then kicked the desk towards Shadow. Shadow teleported and appeared behind Acacia, grabbing her arm. Acacia spun free and kicked at Shadow, but she caught her legs between both of her arms and flipped Acacia into the wall. Acacia sat up, her eyes widened in disbelief.
“That’s impossible…” She said.
“What is it Acacia?” Josh asked as Eileen ran to confront Shadow.
“Her fighting style is definitely Cedaren, I’d recognize it anywhere.”
“So what’s that mean?”
“It means I trained with her! Back in Oregon! The weapons and teleporting is something else but her core moves… Headmistress Yamada showed me that kick reversal personally!”
“Alright, get her talking,” Josh said, standing up. “See if you can get us any idea as to who she is.”
“Right.” Acacia said, as they joined the fight. Eileen came at Shadow with multiple jabs, but she anticipated and blocked each one.
“Predictable.” She growled, punching Eileen. Josh screamed and lunged only for her to roundhouse kick him into a water cooler. “Sloppy!” Acacia spun and grabbed her wrists, pinning her against the wall.
“I know you’re from Cedaren, who are you!” Acacia demanded.
“You have no right to demand anything of me, deserter!” Shadow replied, teleporting from Acacia’s grasp and reappearing behind her.
“Excuse me?” Acacia asked. “I came back and saved everyone I could!”
“You fail to understand!” Shadow shouted, as she kicked Acacia. “You did not desert Cedaren, you deserted us! Everyone else who was left to live up to the standards you set.”
“What are you talking about?” Acacia asked, chopping at her only for her to block and punch Acacia in the face.
“It’s no secret you were Yamada’s favorite.” She replied. “But when you left, she acted as if the rest of us were leftover garbage! Nothing we did, any of us, was good enough for her! ‘Acacia did this faster’ or ‘Acacia perfected that move in her first try’. Acacia this, Acacia that! I spent the rest of my days at Cedaren trying to prove to her that I was good enough! That I was worthy of the title Dōshu! That I could be better than you!”
“I understand you’re upset, but it doesn’t have to be like this!” Acacia replied.
“It does.” Shadow stated. “Because no matter how hard I tried, I was always lost in your shadow.” Shadow lunged at Acacia when suddenly her arm was pinned to the wall by a vintage pocket knife. She looked to see Kyle standing in the doorway.
“Did I look like I was done with you?” He asked. She angrily ripped the knife out of her sleeve and charged at Rice. She tackled him and before they hit the ground, they both vanished in a puff of smoked.
“Where’d they go?” Josh asked.
“Out there!” Eileen replied. They all looked out the window to see Shadow and Kyle outside by an electric tower.
“Let’s go!” Josh exclaimed. Acacia grabbed his shoulder.
“Why don’t you call your armor and end this?” She asked.
“I did!” Josh said. “I hit the Signal like an hour ago, but it’s not coming! I think something’s jamming the transmission!”
* * *
Back on E.G.G Station, James was walking by the Hall of E.G.G sipping a glass of root beer when he heard a loud bang.
“Gyah!” He shouted, throwing his root beer into the air. He looked at the door to the Hall of E.G.G. “Really? Again?” He loudly sighed and walked back to the Feeding Pen.
* * *
Shadow readied a fighting stance as Kyle took out his swords.
“You would turn your blade to an unarmed opponent?” Shadow asked.
“No.” Kyle said, tossing her one.
“Why!?!?” Josh exclaimed.
“Shush.” Eileen said. Shadow gripped the blade with both hands as she and Kyle moved around each other.
“Your move.” She said. Kyle dashed forward and clashed with her three times. He then engaged in a hold and pushed against her so hard sparks spewed from the grinding swords. “Gah!” She shouted, kicking him back. Kyle twisted around and went low, only for her to jump the blade. She sliced at his neck, but he blocked it and knocked her off. She jumped into the air, spun, then teleported. She reappeared behind Kyle and finished her attack, but Kyle quickly moved his blade behind him and back-blocked the blow. He then took her arm in arm and rolled her over him. Before she fell to the ground, she teleported, taking both of them to the top of a cooling tower.
“Aw man,” Josh said.
“We gotta get up there!” Acacia called, as they all went for the ladder. Kyle stood up.
“You gonna keep doing that?” He asked. Shadow aimed her blade at him.
“You are a formidable fighter.” She said. “For that, I shall kill you honorably.”
“You can try.” Kyle replied. The two then rushed into it, the swords moving at lightning speed. Kyle struck with no mercy, Shadow blocking his blows. She broke his attack and swung at him only for him to duck under and go for the stab. She teleported behind him and came down with her blade. Kyle quickly spun around and blocked it. She pushed and pushed, Kyle down to his knees, pushing back as hard as he could. Suddenly, he began to stand to his feet.
“Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!” He screamed. Shadow tried to keep him at bay, but he rose up and began to push her down. “Surrender, now!” He ordered.
“Hnnnuh!” She cried under the strain. “Never!” She then swiped Kyle across the face, dazing him with purple smoke.
“Agh!” Kyle screamed, covering his eyes. She kicked his blade out of his hand, caught it, then kicked him in the leg and brought him to his knees. She crossed both swords at his neck.
“It is a shame you must die this way.” She said. “You may have been a valuable asset to our initiative.”
“You dirty cheater.” Kyle growled. Shadow laughed.
“I learned early on that to get ahead, you can’t always play by the rules.” She was about to finish Kyle when she felt a bite on her ankle. “OW!” she shouted, looking down to see a squirrel. “What the…”
“Stay away from my daddy!” Squirrel Girl shouted, surrounded by an army of squirrels. She pointed a Shadow. “CHARGE!” The squirrels scurried forward and swarmed Shadow.
“Agh! Get them off!” She screamed. Kyle spun around and kicked her, catching his blades.
“Mine.” He said. Josh, Eileen, and Acacia finally made their way to the top of the tower.
“Fool!” Shadow shouted. She teleported and reappeared in the air, taking out two ninja stars. “Yaaaaaa!!!!!” She screamed, flying towards Kyle.
“Heads up!” Josh shouted as he fired a blast from the Midsummer Night.
“No wait!” Kyle shouted, as the blast hit edge of the tower and blew the entire structure to pieces.
“Maybe I didn’t think this throoooooooooooouuuuuuugh!” Josh screamed as he, Kyle, Eileen, Acacia, Squirrel Girl, and a bunch of squirrels began to plummet towards the ground.
“No, I will not let it end like this!” Shadow shouted. She teleported and reappeared on top of Josh.
“Ah! Get off me!” He screamed, as the fell towards the ground.
“I will at least take you.” She said, taking out a ninja star. “With your death, my mission will be complete!” She jabbed at Josh’s chest but he blocked her with his forearm.
“Get… off…” He grunted.
“Die!” Shadow replied. Josh then grabbed the Signal with his free hand and attached it to Shadow’s neck.
“Peekaboo!” Josh said.
“What the-” Suddenly the Signal overloaded and electrocuted Shadow.
“Aaaaahhhh!” She screamed as Josh kicked her off of him.
“Whoa!!!!!” He hollered as he hit a wall, rolled off of a shed, and fell into a dumpster. He pulled himself out. “Yuck! Decommissioned for years and they didn’t bother to take out the trash!” He looked around. “Now where did Shadow get off… WHOA!” He looked up to see Shadow lying impaled on a spike to the perimeter fence. “Oh geez, wow, I didn’t mean to…” Kyle rushed up from behind with Eileen and Acacia.
“What happened? Oh…” He said.
“Oh God.” Eileen gasped, clasping her hands over her mouth.
“Serves her right.” Acacia said, turning and walking off. Josh looked back and raised his eyebrows.
“Should we be concerned she seems pleased by this?” He asked.
“Josh, you know Acacia doesn’t like reminders of her past.” Eileen replied. “Just seeing someone from Cedaren could have brought back a storm of bad memories.”
“I guess…” Josh said. Just then Squirrel Girl rounded the corner.
“You are lucky all of the squirrels survived that fall!” She shouted. “I mean, what were you thinking! Oh, and I got your World War II knife daddy…”
“Dory, don’t look.” Kyle said, quickly covering her eyes.
“Don’t look at what?” She asked, grabbing his hands. “Move, I wanna see!” She pulled his hands away to see Shadow. “Ah!” She screamed. Then she fainted.
“Great.” Kyle said, picking her up.
“Well I guess we’ve gotta report this to Fury,” Eileen said.
“Yeah,” Josh agreed. “I think we… Wait a minute, where is she!” They all looked to see the final remnants of purple smoke fade into the night air.
“Ninja in the Order of the Hand disappear into smoke when they die.” Kyle said.
“Yeah, but she’s been doing that all night.” Josh replied. “So I guess the real question must be is she really gone? Or did she just crawl back into the shadows.”
Josh, Eileen, Acacia, and Kyle were making their way towards a spot where they could teleport back up to the Peak.
“I still don’t know why you tossed her your sword.” Josh said to Kyle. “I’d have just cut her head off then and there!”
“That’s why I can do this.” Kyle replied.
“Look, your honor.”
“Where?” Josh asked, looking back.
“Oh, okay, haha, funny.”
“I think we can teleport from up there.” Eileen said, pointing to a ridge.
“Yeah, alright, I’ll catch up with you guys.”
“Where you going?” Acacia asked.
“Just gonna drain the can. Teleporting sometimes makes me pee my pants.”
“TMI.” Kyle said as he and the girls walked off, disgusted. Josh slowly backed up, then took out a small tracking receiver.
“Talk to me Jocasta.” He said.
“Two more yards due east.” Jocasta’s voice replied from the device. Josh walked forward, then lifted a piece of metal to find the Mandarin’s purple ring lying under it. He picked it up.
“Bingo. Jocasta, update Project Ringleader.”
“Updating… Location crossed off of map.”
“Very good.” He smiled. “Two down, eight to go.”
Make sure to tune in next week for an all new episode of E.G.G and Masters of Doom!