Examining My Close Calls.
We all have them....moents were death taps us on the shoulder and then changes his mind
death can be quite insidiuos and luckily he does not always get his way
Examining my close calls.
Lately I have been
re-examining
my close calls
all those many
wrong numbers
where death
spent a small fortune
dropping change
in the slot of my fate
and putting the
fear of God in me.
Each one carried
profound questions
that have never been
adequately answered
not the final Y of a
man's life of course
that "Y" that they cut
into the grey flesh
of your upper and lower
torso during autopsy.
But rather bone chilling,
teeth chattering
mind bending whys??
that haunt the soul like....
"Why was I spared??"
"Why me when others fell,
never to rise again?"
"What purpose have
I yet to achieve??"
the list of my many
close calls confounds me:
A.-Rickets as an infant
B.-a compound compressed
skull fracture
chrome bumper induced
at the tender age of three
C. a tumble from some monkey bars-
severe concussion- full recovery
D.-holes drilled in my skull,
exploratory surgery
for a tumour at ten
E. baseball bat to
the side of my head
in the projects-Gang related
F. assaulted by
a Hell's Angel
at 14, resulting
luckily in just a
busted nose,
and a bruised ego
G. nearly asphyxiated
by a mistakenly
swallowed jaw breaker
lodged in my
throat in 7th grade.
Saved by an unknown angel
who vanished
before I recovered
enough to thank
her after giving me
a hard slap on my back
when I was inches
from extinction.
H. a fall through the ice,
followed by a
frantic clawing scramble
from a frigid lake
to the later
warmth of an
angry dad's arms
I. an accidental slit wrist
from a friend
using a box cutter at work with me,
blood spurting skyward
all over the inside
of his mustang
as we rushed
to the hospital.
J. U.S. Marines,
Vietnam Veteran,
Military police
club riots,
racially motivated,
our job ...to invade,
divide and control
to reinstate peace,
dodging broken bottles,
fists and professionals
trained to kill,
drunk and in a
rage to do just that.
K. bullets that
whistled by me,
playing a tune
that wasn't yet
bugled as taps for me.
L. a naked
strangle hold
that rendered me
unconscious to
the brink of being
discharged from life.
M. out of control
on black ice
in a Galaxie 500,
spinning into the path
of a Greyhound bus,
the driver and passengers
faces frozen in terror,
then just as suddenly
sliding the opposite way,
as I took out two mailboxes
and a large chunk of real estate,
in an unreal last minute save.
O. pneumonia twice,
once so bad
in boot camp
that I almost drowned
in my own fluids.
P. a near drowning
due to hypothermia
when capsized
in the frigid waters
of the Connecticut River.
Q. food poisoning twice
once from a Las Vegas
Nevada Buffet,
seven days
on an N.G. tube,
after emergency
exploratory surgery.
My only recreation
was being allowed to
suck On Lifesaver candy
and watch the
colors come back up
the stomacher tube
as it was pumped
out continuously.
R. gas leak in a
marina apartment,
electrical fire in the
walls of my parents home,
my shirt also once
burst into blue flame
from chemical fumes
combusting with a Newport.
S. a heart mummer from birth,
a left bundle branch blockage,
and a tiny mitral valve leak...
but my ticker beats on
in spite of all the
cigarettes, booze,
and drugs I abused
in my ill spent youth.
T. lost in the
wilderness twice,
in extreme weather
conditions,
U. -brakes failed twice
coming off mountains,
V. 57 hornet stings
across my abdomen,
non allergic thankfully
W. a fully loaded
logging truck
slamming into
the left front
corner of a Dodge Caravan
I was a passenger in,
bouncing us in
a flight of 150 feet
horizontally spinning
in slow motion,
then landing in a
mountain drainage ditch,
all of us whip lashed, but alive,
though the van was demolished.
Every time I emerged from
each fray with death,
life took on a new persona,
enticing me with its sight,
taste, smell, and touch.
Like a wanton virgin bride,
emanating heat
and whispering
only my name,
I lusted for my my life
after each near miss
I re-pursued it
with intensity,
seizing each moment,
savoring any yet
to be inhaled oxygen,
praising God and fate,
and swearing
off stupidity forever.
I danced, leaped
and cavorted
with the nows which
were then granted me
until I forgot the
proximity of what
I had almost
been destroyed by.
Life went on and I
followed it gratefully
like a wounded
puppy, ignoring
the ringing in my ears
from each close call
as well as any 911
buttons still unpunished.
Oh, sure there will be
other close calls
yet to come that's a given
plus many other
wrong numbers,
for death is persistent.
He's a smooth operator
who will connect
with me eventually,
and who'll be calling collect
and then I'll pay the toll.
I'll hear that
strange white noise
and know that I am
about to be cut off
as I at long last experience
eternal silence,
forever disconnected
from the lifelines
we all are hooked up to.
but for now.................
there's a song I want to share
a love I want to encourage
a picture still unpainted
some clays to mold
some poems to pen
and summer is waiting
to sizzle my sweat
as I am cooled by
those Jumbo Margaritas.
Plus my precious son
who needs his Daddy
and a whole lot of
living to savor! So would YOU mind
taking the next close call??
please??? and if it's for me
just tell 'em I'm stepping
out for a while,
and if it's for you,
hang up and run like hell!!
© 2009 Matthew Frederick Blowers III
