The Funniest Leadership, Life, and Love Quotes
1. A true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him but because he loves what is behind him. G. K. Chesterton.
2. Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying. Arthur C. Clarke.
3. Always do sober what you said you would do drunk. That’ll teach you to keep your mouth shut. Ernest Hemingway.
5. No persons are more frequently wrong than those who will not admit they are wrong. Francois de La Rochefoucauld.
4. In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods. They have not forgotten this. Terry Pratchett.
6. You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realised how seldom they do. Eleanor Roosevelt.
7. “Classic”: a book that people praise but don’t read. Mark Twain.
8. A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting its shoes on. Mark Twain.
9. I did not attend his funeral but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. Mark Twain.
10. Those that believe in telekinesis raise my hand. Kurt Vonnegut.
1. I have 6 locks on my door all in a row. When I go out I lock every other one. I figure that no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. Elayne Boosler.
2. The statistics on insanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from mental illness. Look at your three best friends. If they’re ok, then it’s you. Rita Mae Brown.
3. Only two things are infinite; the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former. Albert Einstein.
4. I like work, it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. Jerome K Jerome.
5. I always arrive late at the office, but make up for it by leaving early. Charles Lamb.
6. The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. Mark Russell.
7. I love mankind; it is people I can’t stand. Charles M. Schulz.
8. God created war so that Americans would learn geography. Mark Twain.
9. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. Oscar Wilde.
10. I intend to live forever; So far, so good. Steven Wright.
1. Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things. Peter Drucker.
2. In fair weather prepare for foul. Thomas Fuller.
3. People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision. John C. Maxwell.
4. To succeed in business it is necessary to make others see things as you see them. Aristotle Onassis.
5. Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and the will surprise you with their ingenuity. General George Paton.
6. The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud but not arrogant; have humour, but without folly. Jim Rohn.
7. People who enjoy meetings should not be in charge of anything. Thomas Sowell.
8. I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can tell you the formula for failure, which is: try to please everybody. Herbert Swope.
9. The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided. Casey Stengel.
10. There are three secrets to managing. The first is having patience. The seconds is being patient. And the third most important secret is patience. Chuck Tanner.
1. Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life. Confucius.
2. I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. Thomas Edison.
3. Never memorise something you can look up. Albert Einstein.
4. A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it. Albert Einstein.
5. A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends. Baltasar Gracian.
6. Wise men speak because they have something to say, fools because they have to say something. Plato.
7. Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. Ambrose Redmoon.
8. Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. Mark Twain.
9. To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. Oscar Wilde.
10. The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Wolf.
True Love Quotes
1. Love is always open arms. If you close your arms about love you will find that you are left holding only yourself. Leo Buscaglia.
2. You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. Amy Carmichael.
3. Perfect love is the most beautiful of all frustrations because it is more than one can express. Charles Chaplin.
4. To love someone means to see them as God intended them. Fyodor Dostoyevsky.
5. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. Albert Einstein.
6. Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. Kahlil Gibran.
7. A friend of mine once defined love as finding someone you can talk too late into the night. James Patterson.
8. True love begins when nothing is looked for in return. Antoine de Saint Exupery.
9. You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Dr. Seuss.
10. If I had a flower for every time I thought of you I could walk through my garden forever. Alfred, Lord Tennyson.
@ 2013 Brian McKechnie (aka WorldEarth)