Fauntleroy and Flossy - Courts? I Don’t Need No Stinking Courts!
Fauntleroy stood, straightening his red tie. He had trouble pulling himself away from the mirror. He walked over to the big brass bed and unfolded what appeared to be a multifold street map. “Help me out Flossy. I had stone cold crazy guy draw me up an organizational chart of the entire world.” He pointed, “There is me at the top. You see the little picture of me there.”
Flossy nodded, like she does, flashing her Slovin Resting Face.
“OK, I am at the top and that so-called judge guy out in the western desert is way out over there. There is no picture of him, you see that. No picture. So answer me this. Why does he even get to talk about the constitution. We here on the east coast wrote the constitution, not the cowboys and Spanish conquistadors. You see my point don’t you? I alone must keep America safe from the Third World Invasion or the brown wave, as Stone Cold refers to it.”
Flossy’s mind wandered off to the Spanish conquistadors. She recovered in time to nod. “Before you run off, Model T and Mr. Model T. seem awfully quiet. I think they are upset. Model T. may need a raise in her allowance. They are not returning my calls.” She pointed to the bank of phones. “Which one of those phones is Model T?” She paused, “Does Stone Cold crazy guy like anybody?”
Fauntleroy flashed her a look, “He likes American Patriots.” And he winked at her. “Gotta go save the world.”
“Wait,” she called. Did you write an Executive Order to move Halloween to February?”
Fauntleroy shot her a soul crushing look, “What are you talking about?”
“Those piles of new robes arrived, with the fancy red cross on the fronts.” She pointed toward the Christian Crusader’s robes used six hundred years ago by the Knight’s Templars.
“Oh, the robes arrived. Great!” He went over and lifted the one that had XXXXL on the collar label. “Can’t run a successful crusade without the right props.” He glanced at his Rolex, “Gotta go. You made me late.” He stopped – “Hey, we saved the country $14.95, in Go-Daddy fees, by taking down the USDA web site. Is someone keeping track. We need to raise one trillion for infrastructure. Mr. Model T. Has contacted every contractor within two hundred miles of the southern border. Oh, are we going to make a mountain of money, selling that wall.” He lifted the pile of robes and carried them off to his cabinet meeting.
This is just a work
to the new restrictions
It may seem
like true depictions
Though just a statement
No reference made
to their addictions
Ignored are lies
Will their trials
It’s just fake news
and my flawed diction
and not predictions
Perhaps a grand wizard
delivers their benedictions
Upon temple steps at
Fauntleroy paced about his office. He looked at the folders piling up with the Alt-Right wish list all made out nice and pretty, just waiting his signature. He estimated just the ceremony of signing three per day it would take a couple of months to work through. His advisors would pat him on the back and say, “Yes, Sir Mr. Fauntleroy, we sure are going to rebuild this carnage strewn country. Yup, that is what we are going to do. Just sign here.”
Fauntleroy flipped open one of the leather covered folders. To sell Federal lands in closed auctions. He closed it and opened another. Shutter the Bureau of Consumer Financial Protection. Defund the Commission of Fine Arts. The stack seemed endless.
He sat down in the chair and attempted putting his feet on the desk, but could not manage it and gave up.
Senator McCarthy said that, “I have here in my hand a list of 205....(communists in the State Department)
Not unlike the claim of unreported terrorist attacks.
History is repeating itself.
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One small step for Checks and Balances.
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.