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Favorite Sayings and Quotes

Updated on September 27, 2012

Favorite Sayings and Quotes

I have put together some favorites of mine with authors as well as a few of my own for the reader's enjoyment. Some are good advice, some are funny and some, well they are just quotes. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed gathering them up to share. By the way only the first one is by Bob Hope.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting to get into the bathroom.~ Bob Hope

" watch out I have a screwdriver... and I WILL use it to unscrew your belly button and watch your butt fall off!"

I figured out why Tiger Woods is playing such a bad game these days... His wife won his mojo and HIS TALENT in the divorce

Anyone remember wearing a Swatch? It was named this because it was made in Switzerland and they put the two names together. Good thing it wasn't named in Croatia...

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather … Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

If everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane!

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

If 4 out 5 people suffer from diarrhea, does that mean that one person actually enjoys it?

Change is inevitable except in vending machines.

Ever burped and got whiplash?


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    • sweetzara profile image

      Zara Rasul 5 years ago from Mumbai, India

      Nice! really funny!

    • Daffy Duck profile image

      Daffy Duck 5 years ago from Cornelius, Oregon

      LMAO! Funny as hell. I love it!

    • kittythedreamer profile image

      Nicole Canfield 5 years ago from the Ether

      Voted up and funny! Gave me a good lil chuckle. :)

    • Smokes Angel profile image

      Smokes Angel 5 years ago from Broke Alabama

      Thanks for stopping by Jackie

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 5 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Fun lines. I saw a picture of Paul Revere that looked just like Paul Revere. I can't say I was a real fan of Bobs being even older than my parents but once all his type die off I think we will have a huge loss in entertainment of what is funny and clean to laugh at. Great hub.

    • Dave Mathews profile image

      Dave Mathews 5 years ago from NORTH YORK,ONTARIO,CANADA

      An interesting collection of lines from good old Bob Hope. I miss him.

    • charfaris profile image

      charfaris 5 years ago

      Cute. Some I've heard before.

    • Smokes Angel profile image

      Smokes Angel 5 years ago from Broke Alabama

      thanks for the comments

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 5 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      very funny..I never heard these before.

    • Barbara Kay profile image

      Barbara Badder 5 years ago from USA

      Good ones.