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Five Failed Loves - haiku style

Updated on January 12, 2013
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Reached out for your heart
Clumsy in my excitement
One Million red shards


Found you at long last
Journey done, baggage unpacked
Crushed under contents


Just wanted to hold
you in my arms. Childlike grip
smothered your soft heart


Still learning the ropes
Fear I might have made a noose
Instead of a net


Destined as lovers
Souls collide at highest speed
Impact shatters hearts

why do we fall in love so easy... even when it's not right...

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    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      AudreyHowitt - Thank you. These are among my favorites and came straight from my heart. My best work always does.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Jools99 - Thank you Julie, that line is the very first image I came up with. I sort of forgot baout this one. I am glad to have the chance to revisit it.

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 4 years ago from California

      These are really beautifully done!

    • Jools99 profile image

      Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

      "Impact shatters hearts" what a wonderful line, you can hear that collision almost, a very evocative idea.

    • acaetnna profile image

      acaetnna 4 years ago from Guildford

      This is beautiful, so clever and very beautiful too.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Sunshine625 - Hi Linda. Yes. Failed love happens. And sometimes it happens because I acted like a total idiot. Live and learn, right? And then haiku, maybe even while eating chocolate enjoying flowers that I bought myself!... Thanks for stopping by to give me a boost! :)

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Way to go Dana! You really rock your haikus. Failed loves is a great theme. This happens often, so why not haiku about it! Women can buy their own candy and flowers! :)

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Thanks Leslie! There is just something so poetic about clumsy love and breaking hearts... i can see the tiny red pieces everywhere. Sometimes that makes me sad, other times, well serves them right.

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Mmmm...one of my favs...

      must share...

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Debbie - yes. whe you get it right, it is great. even if it starts out a bit clumsy,it doesnt mean it will fail.

      It seems I am a lover of poetry and of love. never woulda saw that coming in a million years!

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Dana you are so right if the love is right it is so perfect.. this Haiku s are wonderful simply amazing

      Debbie

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      prasetio30 - thank you for your sweet comment. It makes me happy to know you enjoyed this.

      Thank you for the vote. Take care :)

    • prasetio30 profile image

      prasetio30 4 years ago from malang-indonesia

      Beautiful and I love this poem very much. Good job, my friend. Voted up and God bless you!

      Prasetio

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      prasetio30 - Thank you for your comment!... One thing I love most about HubPages is the interaction with other writers. It is so encouraging ro get feedback, especially when it is from someone that enjoyed my work. :)

      Looking forward to seeing you around.

    • prasetio30 profile image

      prasetio30 4 years ago from malang-indonesia

      Beautiful poem. I like it very much. Thanks for writing and share with us. Voted up!

      Cheers, Prasetio

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      tobusiness - thank you for taking the time to comment. I am so glad these are being enjoyed. poetry is certainly not a money maker or page view attractor, but I love writing it. Knowing people like it is such a thrill.... :)

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 4 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      Loved them... well done.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Jen Card - I am glad you like the addition of the vidie. There is something about the feel of that song that matches the feel I had that inspired these.... We never know what the outcome will be when we throw our heart on the table, but that doesn't mean we should give up doing it! You are right, we should appreciate the failures.... thank you for sharing your thoughts.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      JayDeck - Love your comment... My personality always seems to come out in my writitng... hope to see you around.

    • JayDeck profile image

      JayDeck 4 years ago from New Jersey

      I enjoyed these little gems! The serious subject and the humorous treatment are wonderfully melded.

      -J

    • Jen Card profile image

      Jen Card 4 years ago

      Beautiful! I love how you added Pink's video...perfection! I believe that we fall in love with Mr. Wrong to learn who Mr. Right is. Its all in how we look at it, its not easy sometimes but if we appreciate it maybe the next time we will see Mr. Right before our eyes! Thank you for sharing this wonderful Haiku.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      teacher12345 / Gypsy Rose Lee - Yes. I suppose most of us can relate to these. Everyone swears it will never be them, or never again, but that truly is life, and love... GRL I am in the odd position of having the heatache and the desire to shake the living daylights out of somebody.... ah. life. love. lunacy. :)

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      HLPhoenix - Yes, who has not felt like at least one of these at least one time. And many of us will experience it again. Funny thing is that when you are going through it, it feels like you are the only one who has ever felt it and it is the worst it has ever been, then you swear it will never happen again. That is life and love.....

      Thank you so very much for your incredible comment. You really understand my little poetic nuggets.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Rusticliving - Haiku is really a fin fomr of poetry. When all the "rules" are followed, it truly is a beautiful work of art. Like any artform though, you can always bend it to your style... I hope you give it a try.. thank you for your comment, it gives me the encouragement i need to keep writing. :)

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Just Ask Susan - I adore writing haiku. I actually like the contraints because it forces me to get the absolute most out of every word, and I think it is fun to fuss with it until it comes out right... I will definitely check out the one of yours that you mentioned.... I also popped over to your profile page. Great hubs. I am now following.

      vocalcoach - WRITE A HAIKU! Just do it. You will love it!! thanks for popping by to read and comment. See you around. I am looking forward to reading your haiku!

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up. Nice haikus. Everyone can relate to a failed love now and then. Have had a few in my early years that I thought would make me die from heartache and a few I just wanted to strangle. That's life.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      Good haiku and very well done on the five failed loves -- it's all stages we can relate to!

    • HLPhoenix profile image

      HLPhoenix 4 years ago

      Each of these tiny stories... hold so much pain, so much opportunity to learn, both from our own mistakes... and the ones we haven't made yet but that you so exquisitely describe.

      "...baggage unpacked

      Crushed under contents"

      Who of us has not been on both sides of the 'baggage issue.'

      I especially liked how your 1st and last Haiku seem to tie together...

      One Million red shards

      Impact shatters hearts

      I too like Leslie's word, brilliant! also Sharing.

    • Rusticliving profile image

      Elizabeth Rayen 4 years ago from California

      That is so pretty Dana. Like vocalcoach, I too love Haiku poetry, but have always been too timid to try my hand at it. I really enjoyed yours. thank you for sharing your talent with us!♥---Lisa

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 4 years ago from Nashville Tn.

      Wow - Dana! Really well done. I love Haiku poetry and one of these days will try my hand at it. Thanks so much!

    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I love to write haiku's and if you don't mind I'll put a link from one of mine (which happens to be shown above) called "Haiku Style Poems About a Broken Heart"

      Voting +++ and sharing. Beautiful!

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      ImKarn23 - WOW! Leslie, thank you! I want to print out this comment and frame it! To start I adore the word "brilliant"! It's meaning, even the sound of it. For you to call me that makes me sparkle from head to tow... "raw emotion" is right. This came right from me being a fool. The firsthaiku came to mind amd the others tarted spilling out. I could have kept going for pages.....

      Thank you so much for sharing this all over town. I appreciate it bunches and I am truly honored by it. Thanks for being a fan. Love ya!

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Laurinzo - "the longing that love can create" - I know that well. And as I express in these haiku, that longing sometimes leads me to careslessness,and heartache. Hoping to mend those broken hearts. Time will tell.

      Thank you so very much for taking the time to comment. Thank you also for sharing, that is the highest of compliments.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      LaThing - "awkwardness in love" - That is exactly where I am right now. I think we all find ourselves there at one time or another..... Tankyou for visiting and for the great comment and vote!

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      CloudExplorer - "a sense of intense emotional attachment that is far to hard to let go" - wow! That wipes out any doubt of this piece being effective. I am blown away by your comment..... :)

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      James-wolve - Oh my, what a beautiful comment! And so true. A life of fear is not a life lived well. Fear is never an acceptable reason to avoid something. You could miss out on something beautiful, like love. Or you could fall flat on your face, in wich case you just get up and do it again.....

      Thank you for voting. I left you some fan mail too. Excited to be following you.

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      DanaTeresa: This is simply brilliant, my friend! Absolutely took my breath away with it's depth and raw emotion!

      You are a poetress - without doubt - don't EVER sell yourself short!

      up and sharing everywhere..

    • Laurinzo Scott profile image

      Live To Write 4 years ago from Phoenix, Az.

      ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL DANA... this is an incredible tribute to both the longing that love can create and the style of haiku

      Definitely voting uop and sharing...

    • LaThing profile image

      LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

      This is beautiful, Dana! Very well written...... What an inspiring haiku, describing awkwardness in love :) enjoyed it as always. Voting up and ++

    • CloudExplorer profile image

      Mike Pugh 4 years ago from New York City

      Love is climatic at times isn't it, and I love your personification of it all throughout this poem here. You leave the reader with a sense of intense emotional attachment that is far to hard to let go.

      Nicely done Dana, thumbs up and outta here!

    • James-wolve profile image

      Tijani Achamlal 4 years ago from Morocco

      Beautiful and nicely put.Bertrand Russell says: To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.

      When fear drives our life we stagnate and die. we don’t live our true purpose and we become dark and heavy and the world suffers as a result.When we think we have love that we ever wanted to have,We must stick to it and never let it go.We should drop fear aside.I voted up.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Gus!!! What a great comment! Yes, these are all those things that we do when we are too eager or too "dumb"... Good for you and the Mrs. that you will stick together as she instructs you ;o)

      Can you believe that I haven't been following you?! Talk about screwing up! I have fixed that... see you around the hubs.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
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      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      Mhatter99 - thanks for stopping by. The idea just popped into my head and I went with it. happy to please.

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      xstatic - Love doesnt always lead to passion, or ebd in happily ever after. Looks like you and I are unlucky enough to know about htat first hand.... Wishing you the lucky kind of love!

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      Good use of haiku to reflect on failed love. Thank you.

    • GusTheRedneck profile image

      Gustave Kilthau 4 years ago from USA

      Howdy Dana (DanaTeresa) - Good stuff here. My favorite is the one starting with "Still learning the ropes..." I discussed the lines with my bride, and she agrees that it will take me another 60 years to do the necessary learning. :-)

      Gus :-)))

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      Really good, meaningful Haiku! Anyone who has been there can relate, so that includes me.