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For Me To Live You Must Die
The smell of death lingers in the room. Total silence penetrates the walls. As we both looked lost for words the gory stare at each other seems to be the only thing we can agree on. That once warm and gentle feeling I had for you was gone, and the sudden urge of hate and anger oozed within my flesh. Dark thoughts slowly creep into my mind and the innocent child in me couldn't bare to watch this unlawful sight . As I take a moment to reflect on the man I use to be, the smirk on your face grows bigger doubting whether I can be that person again.
I was the life of the party; my family was pretty cool too they loved having me around. Dad used to say my laugh could light up the room but as the memory fades away the daunting reality hits me… I no longer know how to laugh or smile. All that is left is an empty body whose soul is lost and nowhere to be found.
Looking at you was unbearable, it reminded me of how much I hated myself. I used to run to you like a child not knowing or caring about the consequences. Waking up in the middle of the night constantly whispering into my ear to “Do it just one more time.” I tried to fight this feeling but with every breath I took, the lure of temptation grew stronger and I only had myself to blame.
Struggling to hold back the tears I let go and screamed “Look what you've done to me!”.......
Confused by this sudden revelation I fall to my knees, smacked with the bitter taste of guilt rotting in my mouth. At this point I couldn't feel any worse. You pushed me too far but in the end this was all my own doing.
Unable to take this all in, I look up to see that filthy grin taking center stage and the mournful mood becomes ever present. Resisting the urge to do wrong I make a plea with myself to hold back this dangerous force but I was weak, doubtful and resigned to not winning this battle.
The whispers became darker and cruel, binding me down to the floor .I was trapped and begging for this merciless nightmare to end, when a small voice speaks to me warm and kind. Not sure whether to listen, it speaks to me again but this time it cuts through the sunless atmosphere and rushes straight to my heart.
All I could think of was the cry of these powerful words coming to my rescue .I couldn't understand why someone or something would want to save me , my heart was moved by such love I’d never felt .
Dawn broke out and the skies became clear. Still lying on the floor I look up to see you hiding in the corner scared and worried.Your tricks were out of touch , the whispers were muted and the Juggernaut life figure you walked around in became weak and spineless . There was no place for you here, and slowly you became forgotten until nobody could recognize who you were.
Months had passed and I was enjoying life again with a sense of purpose and responsibility. Sometimes you would watch me from afar hoping that I would fall. I sit alone knowing that at any moment you might try and strike again, but i'm comforted by those words of wisdom and remind myself that
' For me to live you must die’....