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Friday Night Train Station

Updated on June 14, 2017

Oncoming Train

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Libran Pendulum

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Crowded Platform

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A free verse Sonnet


Tracks spark like flint; the rats scurry below.

The din of wheels and wind,

Rushes through the tunnel.

I stand at its entrance;

Gaze at the inebriates; the disenchanted…

It is Friday night; the traumas of the day,

Are lost in the revelry of the bottle,

Emptying itself, down many a weary throat.

The train screeches to a halt;

The Libran pendulum swings;

A packed crowd pushes out; another forces in.

“Mind the gap!” Shouts the signalman.

The train takes off;

I hear the noisy wheels, rumbling in the distance.


Manatita, The Lantern Carrier. Copyrighted, June 13th, 2017.

~Awakening The Inner Light ~

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Swinging pendulam

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Swinging Peddulum

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    • Venkatachari M profile image

      Venkatachari M 6 weeks ago from Hyderabad, India

      A beautiful sonnet describing the train journey. I used to travel in the local electric trains during my student life to reach my college for some years. It was a great enjoyment even though the trains used to be packed with people and you have barely one minute to ascend or descend the trains.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Yes. Can be that crazy in London too. Thanks Bro.

    • tsmog profile image

      Tim Mitchell 6 weeks ago from Escondido, CA

      This poem brought to life the experience for me. Well done. Thanks for sharing.

    • Harishprasad profile image

      Harish Mamgain 6 weeks ago from India

      What a vivid imagery, similar to the scene at any railway station in India here ! Brother, you brought the train station just before my eyes. A railway station is a place where you can never feel bored, as so much happens there moment to moment ! Enjoyed reading this beautiful sonnet.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 6 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      A great capture of this centuries old tradition. Out here in the SW US we seem to be attached to our cars even when it makes no sense.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Thanks Tim.

      Me too, bro, me too. Worse after a football (soccer) match, if one is unfortunate enough to get caught up in it. Appreciations.

      Harish,

      I like the idea of never being bored. No, no chance. Quite colourful at weekends. Did you like the idea of me doing something different?

      Eric,

      Spring Valley, eh? A bit like Houston, perhaps,except that there it's very hot. Appreciations.

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 6 weeks ago from Washington DC

      Rush Hour's daily routine except here in DC where a girl's mechanical voice tells us "step back, doors closing" before the rumbling fades in the distance.

      Interesting.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Yes, Bro.

      It looks like all large cities have this problem. Thank you so much!!

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 6 weeks ago from The Caribbean

      The Friday night comes through clearly. So does your crowded platform picture. I hear the noise. Excellent!

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Thank you, Dee.

      One with a difference. Appreciated.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 6 weeks ago from Washington State, USA

      Oh yes, "mind the gap." I once spent a week in London and was terrified of trying to drive on the "opposite" side of the road, so used public transportation everywhere. This is quite a vivid picture of the sights and sounds and humanity in the tube. So many people, all alone.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Ah, Linda.

      So you have visited us? Great!

      You have used those words 'all alone.' We are all so alone, sometimes, even with husbands/wifes/partners. All is in a state of flux and nothing is permanent. The Soul knows this even unconsciously and reflects from time to time.

      We have had some recent and very sad events in London, the last only today, but they all serve as powerful reminders that tomorrow is not ours. So yes, we are really 'all alone.'

      'Mind the gap,' yes. It has featured in many poems and prose. Gratitude ... much.

    • Tamara Moore profile image

      Tamara Yancosky 6 weeks ago from No Idea Where

      I was reading your engaging poem, and was sorry when it ended. I wanted to know what happened next...

      Tamara

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 6 weeks ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Your description is excellent, Manatita. You've brought the scene and time to life.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Ha ha, Tamara.

      I write stories too. So give me a theme and I'll write one for you. Good morning and have a great day!

      Indeed, Alicia,

      Indeed! Thank you so much!!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 6 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

      I love trains. Love the sound of them. They are romantic figures cutting a swath through our lives.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Yes, Bro.

      They are fascinating things. My teacher loved them a lot!! Thank you so much!

    • Tamara Moore profile image

      Tamara Yancosky 6 weeks ago from No Idea Where

      Oh! How lovely! I was thinking of a theme about someone finding their passion and purpose in life. I am still investigating this for myself- how to find my passion and purpose in life. I want to have no regrets that I did not live my life for the greater good. I feel that I want to help people, somehow, but I don't know how.

      Blessings and hugs,

      Tamara

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Pray over it. Then ask God if it's His Will.

      Why don't you attend a meditation class? We can't be all that far from you. Look up Sri Chinmoy Centres in your area.

      Meanwhile, I feel you have the gift to do what me, Gypsy, Jodah, Audrey and others do. Serve through your poetry. Do you feel the call? It must not be what Manatita wants, but what your Soul wishes. Listen and pray; pray and listen.

    • Tamara Moore profile image

      Tamara Yancosky 6 weeks ago from No Idea Where

      Thank you dearly, Manatita! I will ask God! No, you all must not be too far away from me. I will email you my area of present residence so as not to publish it. I have recently moved. I like this idea very much about serving thru poetry! I am going to copy and paste your response to my clipboard so that I can keep reading it as a guide. Thanks be to The Lord!

      Love,

      Tamara

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 6 weeks ago from london

      Gratitude ... much.

    • MichaelValdez profile image

      Michael Valdez 5 weeks ago from bedminster, bristol

      Hello, very colourful piece. I often marvel at the train spotting culture, I am very apprehensive about trains. I truly like the part with sparks flying, rats, inebriates, and the Libran pendulum. Anything I read that adds elements for me to visualize, is something that has a depth to it. Two very crafty parts of this piece is the train arriving in the beginning and then the train taking off at the end, which is a masterful technique of showing the train in motion: from the start, stopping in the middle, and then to finish its journey. That skill of showing this motion true to the nature of the train, must be commended. When a writer shows this ability to do that it leaves a wrap around effect for me where I like to read it again for the effect. Anyhow enjoyed this and thank you for posting it.

      Michael.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 5 weeks ago from london

      Wow! Michael,

      What a great appraisal of my work from you! You seem to understand it well. Bless you, bro. Appreciated!

      My friend in the house has a daughter who grew up in Bedminster. Glad to see that you're from there. I will visit you later, post work and poetry live.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 3 days ago from Central Florida

      Oh my goodness, look at all those people waiting to board the train! Claustrophobia personified!

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 3 days ago from london

      Haha Shauna.

      Big cities are much worse! Thank you so much.

    • Fullerman5000 profile image

      Ryan Fuller 3 days ago from Louisiana, USA

      This poem brings back memories of the first time I was in New York and got to ride on my first subway train. It was a fun experience. I have ridden on multiple trains since then, but that first ride was definitely a fun time. Great work and thank you for taking me back down memory lane.

    • manatita44 profile image
      Author

      manatita44 2 days ago from london

      Ryan, I thank you so much. You're a good man. I used to ride the NY subway too. I'll be there in three weeks. Much Love.

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