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Funny Pun – Number Eleven

Updated on March 4, 2012
Rodeo Ray needs hazardous pay.
Rodeo Ray needs hazardous pay.

Funny Pun – Number Eleven

Story of Rodeo Ray

This is a Western story.

It took place back in the day,

About a handsome cowboy,

His name was Rodeo Ray.


Back then Ray earned his living

Riding bulls and mean horses.

It was hazardous to his health

So he looked for other sources.


Ray was brave and Ray was bold.

With his horse he searched for gold.


One night he made his camp

On some tree-studded land.

There he was soon captured

By an Indian band.


You might ask what had Ray done?

What crime was so profound?

Unknowing, Ray made his camp

On sacred burial ground.


The Indian chief told Ray,

“White man, you’re going to die.

Since you have defiled our land,

We cannot turn a blind eye.”


Big Chief Medicine Hat

Felt sorry for the lad.

Knowing he would be killed

Made him feel a bit sad.

He said to the cowboy,

“You have three days to live.

So here is the promise

That to you I will give.


You have one wish a day

For any sort of treat.

By sunset on day three,

My son, you’ll be dead meat.”


Rodeo Ray understood

And asked them to fetch his horse.

Under these circumstances,

Ray's horse was his last resource.

Ray then embraced his horse,

Without showing any fear,

And whispered a message

Into his horse’s ear.


Then he slapped its rump

And the horse ran away.

It returned to the camp

Later in that same day.


With a beautiful blonde

Who was naked as a jay.

She joined Ray, the cowboy,

In the teepee they made hay.

The Indians were surprised.

They thought the cowboy loopy.

Instead of trying to escape,

Ray and the blonde made whoopee!


On the second day,

The chief asked Ray his pleasure.

Ray asked for his horse.

It was his greatest treasure.


Ray quickly whispered something

Right into his horse’s ear,

And sent the horse in to town.

What he said, they could not hear.

Ray's Rodeo Job

Later when the horse returned.

The Indians were mute.

Astride was a cute redhead

In just her birthday suit.


Ray took her into the teepee.

The Indians just shook their head.

This cowboy is going to die

But now he just takes her to bed.


Now the third day is at hand,

Ray’s at the end of his rope.

If the horse does not understand,

Then Ray has lost all faith and hope.


Ray asks for his mount once more,

Grabs the ears of his horsey,

Yells, “Read my lips as before.

POSSE, dammit … P-O-S-S-E!!!”

Ray's horse survived but put on a little weight.
Ray's horse survived but put on a little weight.

Indian joke (Warning! It’s a groaner).

Many moons ago two cowboys were riding across the prairie when they came across an Indian lying down with his ear on the ground. They dismounted and asked him what he was doing. The Indian said, “Two wagons, four horses, two men, two women, one small child, one cow, two goats, and one large brown and white spotted dog.”

The cowboys said, “Whoa, you can tell all that just by listening to the ground?”

“No,” said the Indian, “They ran over me half an hour ago.”

© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2012. All rights reserved.

Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So"

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    • Jewel531 profile image

      RJ Groves 

      12 months ago from Maryland

      Hahahaha -- so great - can I share some of these on SaltyPun.com? They are too good not to!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      5 years ago from south Florida

      Surprised, KKGals? Then I have achieved my mission! Thank you, thank you.

    • KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

      Susan Hazelton 

      5 years ago from Sunny Florida

      Here I thought Roy had quite a way of spending his last days. Boy was I surprised at the end.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Awwwwwww, PDX, that's the sweetest thing you ever said to me. Thank you, my friend. I'll try very, very hard not to tarnish!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 

      6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      drbj, people tend to have dirty minds, so, I think you're golden :-)

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Yes, Kelly, I, too, have heard that aphorism about having to have bad days so we could appreciate the good days. Speaking for myself, I would appreciate the good days just as much without the bad days. Who do I tell?

      Happy you are above the weather again and thanks, m'luv, for the return visit. I do appreciate you.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 

      6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Drbj - i am back up and feeling wonderful! Thank you! It's like they say - we have to have not so good days - or how the heck would we know to appreciate all those good days?

      I still read the poem again - I'm not one to lose out on a laugh if there's one to be had:) haha!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Any time, Rosemary, any time. You are welcome for the laughs. Yup, Ray's horse might have been hard of hearing but he did know how to deliver the goodies. I mean, goods. Thank you for laughing, m'luv.

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 

      6 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Hahaha this is so funny, poor dumb horse needs his ears cleaned out. And we got a bonus too with your last joke.

      I must say I laughed at Marties comment too. Lol

      Thank you for the laughs

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      I hope you are rolling on the floor that is carpeted while laughing, Martie, would hate to be responsible for your picking up splinters. Thank you for the up to the stars vote, m'luv.

      Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,thud. What's that? Me laughing at your 'cops' remark so hard, you naughty girl, that my head fell off!!!

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      6 years ago from South Africa

      Whoahahahaha! I am rolling on the floor laughing :))) He-he-he...

      Oh, send me that horse. Maybe he will catch the word 'cops' incorrectly.... He-he :)

      drbj, I've voted you with hub and all up to the stars... :)

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, Kelly, your request for cake with the punch-line has been duly noted. Not acted upon of course (like our government) but duly noted.

      Sorry to hear you were feeling under the weather. Did you know that ancient expression came from the old British sailing ships? When a sailor wasn't feeling well he was confined below decks out of (under) the weather.

      Delighted I gave you a chuckle with that punch line. Hope you are 'above' the weather now, m'dear.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 

      6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Drbj - you do deliver the best punch lines:) lol Next time - how 'bout some cake to go with it?

      I am taking the day off (feeling under the weather) - I knew visiting you would give me a chuckle:)

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      And I love you, Eddy, for loving it. Who says hard work doesn't pay off? Perhaps not in realm of he coin - whatever that means - but certainly in the gracious comments one receives. Especially from you, m'dear. Hope your weekend was pleasant and not too cold.

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 

      6 years ago from Wales

      Great work and oh ow I loved it. Your obvious hard work certainly paid off.

      Thanks for sharing;take care and have wonderful weekend.

      Eddy.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      I will share something with you, PDX. After I finished writing this pun, I had second thoughts. Would the word, posse be passe? Guess my worry was groundless. Folks appear to have received the message. Thanks for the visit.

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 

      6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      boy, if i had a dollar for every time I meant to say posse...

      shared...

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      I dunno, Docmo, from the looks of your avatar, methinks you may have achieved your 'P-M' goal. And you are most welcome for any laughs I can provide. I'll try to come up with some more puns - just for you.

    • Docmo profile image

      Mohan Kumar 

      6 years ago from UK

      I always wanted to be a Posse- Magnet. I mean, I always wanted to play Cowboys and Indians. Thanks for the laughs! You are a veritable mine of these punny verses. More, more.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Your supposition may be correct, Hilary, I just hate to publish negative news. Hahahahahahaha-plop. That's me laughing so hard at your remark about the Chief and his use of Ray's horse that my head fell off.

    • Green Lotus profile image

      Hillary 

      6 years ago from Atlanta, GA

      I'm still wondering if Ray made it thru after all, but i guess not :( I'm sure the Chief made clever use of a horse who could round up good posse. Cheers!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Thank you, Dex, for enjoying my wordspin. Do hope the nonstop laughing is not taking a physical toll on you, my friend. And thank you for the Up!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image

      Dexter Yarbrough 

      6 years ago from United States

      Dr. BJ! Another delightful spin on words! I just can't stop laughing! Voted up, up and away!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      What a delight, Alastar, to find someone who enjoys Eddie Cantor - the comedian with those 'Goo-Goo' eyes. He was one of the first comedians who made a successful transition from the vaudeville stage to the movies. They don't make 'em like that any more.

    • Alastar Packer profile image

      Alastar Packer 

      6 years ago from North Carolina

      Ha ha Drbj! I've loved Eddie Cantor for a long time. Seen all his Goldwyn movies 'cept for one or two. Even turned my little nieces and nephews on to him. One of the nephews can't get enough of the color ice-cream factory fantasy in Kid Millions!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Anyone, Paradise, who enjoys and quotes my punchlines, is a friend of mine, m'dear. Thanks for the LOL at "Posse, dammit, Posse!" Still giggling at that one myself.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, Alastar. You surprised me with your quote of the lyrics from the very old Eddie Cantor song, "Making Whoopee." Musta been your grandpa told you 'bout that song.

      I promise to keep on making these 'awesome puns' as you requested, my friend. Thank you for the 'wicked clever.'

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Thank you for visiting, mamalila - delighted to have you stop by and to learn that you enjoy my hubs. Providing the 'cheer' was my pleasure. So you laughed for days at the Brad and Angie date hub? Do hope that did not result in any health complications.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Thank you, frog, for that vote of confidence! I didn't know you knew how to speak 'cowboy.' Yee-Haw backatcha.

    • Paradise7 profile image

      Paradise7 

      6 years ago from Upstate New York

      LOL! "Posse, dammit, Posse!" What a great punchline!

    • Alastar Packer profile image

      Alastar Packer 

      6 years ago from North Carolina

      Another season, another reason, for makin' whoopie. And he ain't talkin' 'bout the cavalry either! You just keep on makin' these awesome puns Drbj. Wicked clever madam!

    • mamalila profile image

      JNSimmons 

      6 years ago from Washington, DC

      I do enjoy your hubs first thing in the morning. I laughed for days from the Brad and Angie date video. Thanks for the cheer!

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 

      6 years ago from Arlington, TX

      YEE HAW!!! You go Girl!

      The Frog

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Delighted you enjoy coming to my Hubs, b. The feeling is mutual. Yes, I was feeling a bit devilish with this one -happy I didn't let you down with the punchline.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Do I remember Mr. Ed? I've been around so long, amillar, I remember when Mr. Ed was a colt called Eddie. Thanks for the visit and the clever comments.

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 

      6 years ago

      Oh Drbj, you are so Funny and Clever...And I just got the PUNCH LINE...YOU Devil you! Always Love coming to read your HUBS!

    • amillar profile image

      amillar 

      6 years ago from Scotland, UK

      Well at least he didn't bring back a Siamese posse. (They're too ill natured). Or a posse of flowers (half eaten of course; a horse is a horse of course. Do you remember Mr Ed?)

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, Alicia. So you researched the Internet to understand the punchline, m'dear. Now I am really intrigued. What did you type in the search box I am wondering? Could be the inspiration for a whole new hub. Right?

      Thanks for loving the end joke and being entertained by the pun.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, mary. Delighted I gave you a great laugh today ... again. I'll try to keep them coming since you love them. I just have to remember that for inspiration I must stay off my meds!

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, pras. Thank you for enjoying this pun and the 'well done and the up.' (Maybe not as unusual as your story about the boy with night vision though.)

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, christopher. Yes, I know all about your sheltered upbringing and I did give some thought to not publishing this funny pun since I did not want to shock you. But then I realized anyone who loves classical music like you do has a superior understanding of human nature. Right?

      You are spot on. Ray turned a bad situation around, maybe even upside down? Thanks for enjoying the ending joke, too. I'll try to keep them coming ... or going.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Thank you for the hahaha, fp. The funniest yet, eh? Compared to what? No, forget that, just foolin'.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Hi, Ruby. You are so right. Ray's horse needed hearing aids but they only came in small, medium and large. No stallion size available.

      I am so proud to be named your favorite joke teller of all times. It is an honor I will not soon forget. What was your name again, dear?

      Oh, and thanks for the Bravo, Bravo, too.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Thanks for having fun with this punny poem, Linda. Delighted you enjoyed the rodeo. And thanks for the Up and funny.

    • drbj profile imageAUTHOR

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      Ah, Nellieanna - you are a strong, silent woman ... but that G-R-I-N is worth a thousand words, m'dear. Thank you.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 

      6 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      I loved the joke at the end, drbj, but I was annoyed with myself at first for not understanding the pun, since your joke hubs are so funny! So I did some research on the Internet and now I understand!! Thanks once again for a very entertaining article. I'm looking forward to your next pun hub.

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 

      6 years ago from Florida

      You've done it again! How in the world do you think of this stuff????? You gave me a great laugh today. Keep these coming, I love them!

    • prasetio30 profile image

      prasetio30 

      6 years ago from malang-indonesia

      Again...you come up with fun and I really enjoy this hub. Well done and rated up!

      Prasetio

    • christopheranton profile image

      Christopher Antony Meade 

      6 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

      I had to think about it for a minute. But then I did have a very sheltered upbringing. I'm laughing now, mind you. At least the cowboy knew how to make the best of a bad situation.

      The joke at the end was very good as well.

      "Keep em comin".

    • profile image

      Feline Prophet 

      6 years ago

      Hahaha...quite possebly the funniest yet! :)

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      6 years ago from Southern Illinois

      I am LMAO. This is so funny..The poor horse needed a hearing aid HaHa..You are without a doubt my favorite joke teller of all times..Bravo, Bravo..

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 

      6 years ago from Orlando, FL

      This pun was lots of fun! I felt like I was right there at the rodeo. UP! Funny!

    • Nellieanna profile image

      Nellieanna Hay 

      6 years ago from TEXAS

      g-r-i-n . . . .

    working

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